


something's gotta give (something's gotta break)

by goesonandon



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Cheryl Blossom Needs a Hug, Choni Angst, Established Choni, Eventual Smut, F/F, Toni Topaz Needs a Hug, Top Toni Topaz
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-16
Updated: 2019-04-01
Packaged: 2019-11-20 14:55:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 43,386
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18127838
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goesonandon/pseuds/goesonandon
Summary: “We just…we want different things.” She finally said. “She moved out of Thistlehouse a couple of days ago. She said it was ‘too soon’ for her. We broke up.”“I’m so sorry, Cher.” Archie said.“Me too, Arch.”-Picks up right after the last fight at the speakeasy, kind of canon-compliant, where Cheryl thought they broke up and Toni just wants her own space. I'm kind of in need of choni angst. Sorry.





	1. no reason to stay

**Author's Note:**

> hi! i'm raging about the lack of choni fanfic after that fight at the speakeasy so i kind of made one for myself. plus, i needed to get some things out. i'm not picking sides, and this is my take on what happened between them based on the last episode, added some things on there as well. enjoy my fellow angst monsters.

It was all making sense now. Everything. At first, Cheryl thought it was just a rough patch, so she tried everything in her power to fix things with her girlfriend, at least in the little ways that she knows. But when Toni made it clear that them moving in together was just “too soon” and “too fast”, it all made sense.

They haven’t been on the best terms lately. She thought of their first fight in the girls’ bathroom. That’s where it all started. And Cheryl will be damned to say she didn’t try. She did try. She tried seeing everything in her girlfriend’s perspective, especially after knowing about her previous situation with her uncle. She tried to make up for all of it. She knows she did.

And she totally sees it now. It’s like patching up leaks of a sinking boat with cheap wood. Every time she tries to fix things with Toni, the more they sunk. She was willing to go impossible amount of measures to try again, and again, and again until it’s fixed, until it works. She did love Toni, probably even more than she loved anyone else.

But if it’s Toni that wants to do this, then there’s absolutely nothing that she could possibly fucking do anymore. And god, to be absolutely fucking honest, she’s tired.

It wasn’t even the closeness her girlfriend and Veronica shared during that song number that sends her to tears every night after their fight. She wasn’t jealous of the fact that Toni’s arms were wrapped around Veronica’s waist. It’s not even that stupid song that they were singing in that stupid stage and that stupid speakeasy. No, not even close. It was the happiness and carefree in Toni’s eyes while she was singing her heart out, just having fun with “their” friends, something that she hasn’t seen in her girlfriend for a while now, at least not around her. It was the fact that she was more interested in going to her road trip with the Poisons instead of spending time with her.

She still loves her.

She still loves her so when Toni arrived that morning in Thistlehouse to get the rest of her stuff back, Cheryl has graciously collected all her stuff and put it in a bag so Toni wouldn’t have to go around the house to pick up bits and pieces. She even made sure to put extra toiletries supplies like toothpaste, shampoo and conditioner, and soap so she would have something to use. Plus, she couldn’t dare to see Toni if she had to move around the house to pick up her things. She locked herself in her room as soon as she heard the motorcycle rumble outside. She couldn’t look at Toni then, because Cheryl knows. She knows that just seeing Toni would’ve made her beg for dear life, beg for her to stay and try to fix things again. And Cheryl Blossom isn’t a beggar. She was raised to believe that.

And so, the moment she heard the door close for the second time, she buried herself in her blankets and broke down.

_Mother was right._

These are the thoughts running in her head as she dries her hair. Getting out of bed today was incredibly harder today, almost impossible. Since, Toni wasn’t there to wake her up. She’s gone.

She carefully applied make up on her face so to cover up her swollen eyes. She dressed up, looked at herself in the mirror, and held her head high.

_I’m Cheryl Blossom. Cheryl Blossom. HBIC Cheryl Blossom._

One last look and she was ready to go. She headed straight to where her car was, not even bothering with breakfast because Toni is, and will always be, _everywhere_ in this god dammed house. She tries to shake the thoughts in her mind before they even formed. Not today. Not right now.

As soon as she stepped foot inside Riverdale High, she gets rid of absolutely everything and anything that might show off weakness.

This is easier, she thought. It’s easier to put up a front as if she doesn’t care instead of crying. What will that do? It hasn’t gotten her anything for the past few days, did it? It certainly didn’t bring Toni back.

“Out of my way, bottom feeders!” She was queen bee Cheryl Blossom again and it felt nice. It’s not nearly enough for the emptiness that she has been filled for the past few days but at least it’s something. She gave her most powerful walk and for once she felt like she’s untouchable again.

_And the she sees her._

She sees her at the corner of her eye. She’s right there, standing in front of her locker with Veronica in tow.

 _Veronica Lodge._ Ugh.

She stopped in front of her own locker just a few inches from Toni’s, her face showed pride and power, determined not to pay them any attention. Toni wanted space, she’s gonna give her some. Lots of it, in fact.

“Hey Cheryl.” Veronica greeted.

Cheryl hummed in response, dismissing her friend. She can feel Toni’s eyes burning the side of her face. She took what she needed, slammed her locker door shut as loud as she can and then left.

“ _Hey Veronica. I’m doing good this morning, how about you?”_ The raven haired girl said, doing her best impression of her friend. “What is her deal?”

Toni just sighed. “Things between us are…I don’t even know, Ronnie.”

Concern took over Veronica’s face. “Toni, what happened?”

Toni shrugged, clearing her throat, not knowing exactly how she’s going to go through this information to her friend and boss. But she figured she might as well tell her now instead of Veronica finding out from Reggie or anyone else. “I know you’re probably going to be mad but…let’s just say I’ve been staying at the speakeasy for the past couple of nights now. I moved out of Thistlehouse.”

“What?!” The other brunette exclaimed. “Are you serious? Hashtag Choni is over?”

“No!” Toni answered. “No, of course not. We’re just taking a small break I guess, we’ve been fighting nonstop for the past couple of weeks. I just want her to realize some things. But no, we’re not broken up. I will never let that happen.”

“I can’t believe you were staying at the speakeasy. That explains why you’re always the first one there. You’re sneaky, Topaz.”

“I’m sorry, Ronnie. I just have nowhere to go. I’m not in the best terms with Sweet Pea and Fangs either considering, you know…”

“Oh, it’s totally okay, T. You’re welcome to stay there for as long as you want, with all the help that you and the Poisons are providing, it’s cool…you can,” Veronica paused. “You’re even welcome to stay with us in the Pembrooke. B and I are having sleepovers every night. “ She smiled.

“Um, I’m not sure Betty will be comfortable around me, Ronnie. With all the serpents and poisons drama…Plus, I don’t know if Cheryl will be happy to know that it’s slumber parties every night for me with her friends. It’s just not appropriate, but thanks I appreciate it.”

Veronica sighed. Toni has  point. “Okay then, T. But you’re still welcome to join us if you’re up for it. I’m sure Betty won’t mind.”

The bell saved Toni before she could even say anything. Both girls rushed to first period.

 

* * *

 

The rest of the day went entirely slow for Cheryl. She managed to make it half of the day without having to see Toni. During lunch, she sat with the Vixens and Toni sat with the Poisons. She can literally feel Toni’s eyes on her, as well as the wondering eyes around them. People are starting to wonder why President Blossom is without her first lady Topaz.

Cheryl thought she’s doing a good job with hiding what she’s going through, but when Archie Andrews sat beside her during Chemistry, she couldn’t help but frown and sigh when he asked her how she was doing. In some weird way, she’s comfortable around Archie, partly because he looks a lot like Jason. Ever since that day on Sweet Water River where the redheaded boy saved her life, she feels as if they had formed some weird connection. This boy did nothing but defend her, with what happened with Nick St. Clair and all  

“I’m…I’m okay, Archie.”

“Are you sure? You don’t look okay at all, Cher.” He placed a comforting hand on her shoulder. “I’m here if you wanna talk about it.”

Tears started to form in her eyes.  Archie Andrews is just so pure. Nobody could replace Jason in her heart but this boy, this boy is something else. “Oh Archie, as much as I appreciate it, Mr. Gibson’s Chemistry class isn’t the right place to have this discussion.” She said wiping her eyes.

“Well, Josie and I are going to Pop’s after school. You wanna come? I’m sure Josie misses you. She’s worried about you too.”

 _Josie_. With all the craziness happening in Toniworld, she can’t believe came to a point where she forgot that she has a best friend. She’s sure Josie’s dealing with a lot of things for herself either, and she’s happy she’s got Archie to help her now.

Cheryl paused, contemplating if she wants to intrude their date. But it’s Archie who invited her and so perhaps this is what she needs. “Okay.” She responded, _third wheeling to her best friend. Okay._

“Okay.”

 

* * *

 

“So, when did this…” Cheryl motioned to the two of them. “…happen?”

Archie chuckled while Josie’s eyes widened. “What ‘this’? There’s no…” Josie pointed to the two of them.

“Oh please, I see you two doing heart eyes on the hallways at school. Plus, I can feel the sexual tension from across the table. You do not fool me, Josephine.”

The two seemed flustered and just smiled at the teasing of the redhead.

“Well, I’m happy for you both, really.” And she means that, genuinely. Even when her own love life is non-existent and floating on the void right now. “Josie, you deserve to be happy. You too, Arch. Cheryl Blossom approves.”

There was silence between the three of them. A silence not even the music at Pop’s could fill. She looks at where the people will be lining up to enter the speakeasy later. A few hours from now, Toni’s going to be here. She works for Veronica. It’s a bit risky, what she’s doing. Toni might pop in anytime there. 

She’s worried about Toni. She knows the girl is not on speaking terms with Sweet Pea and Fangs, she can’t go back to her tent, she has absolutely nowhere to go. But then again, maybe Toni was bold enough to move out because of the money that comes from her job at the speakeasy.

 _She’s probably renting somewhere_. Yeah, Cheryl’s just gonna go with that. It doesn’t help that she’s envisioning worse for her… _ex?_

“Cheryl…we’re here if you wanna talk.” Josie prompted. “What happened between you and Toni?”

Cheryl looked at her neatly polished nails. She doesn’t know where to start. Everyone knows how madly in love they were. They were _the_ power couple. It’s going to be impossible talking about it without the tears, but she wants to do it. She’s not gonna regress and deal things on her own again. At least, she’s gonna try to let people in. _She’s gonna try._

“We just…we want different things.” She finally said. “She moved out of Thistlehouse a couple of days ago. She said it was ‘too soon’ for her. _We broke up._ ”

“I’m so sorry, Cher.” Archie said.

“Me too, Arch.”

“I’m sure you two are going to be okay. You’re going get past this. You’re Cheryl and Toni.” Josie offered. That last part made Cheryl sad. Yes they were, and now they’re not.  “We’re here for you, okay?” Josie added. “I can sleepover at your house if you want.”

Cheryl looked at the both of them and she knew exactly what they were thinking. Archie Andrews was the person to save her from it after all. “I appreciate that Josie. I really do. But it’s fine. I’m going to be fine. I’m not thinking about it, I promise.”

She meant that. She hasn’t been thinking about it. _She tries hard not to_. She’s going to be fine.

“Cheryl, please. We need to be sure. We’re just worried about you.”

“I know, but really, it’s going to be fine. I’m going to be fine. I have Nana Rose. I just need to focus on taking care of her.”

Josie paused for a second. It must have been a discussion for the two of them. Archie must’ve talked to Josie about it. She’s grateful, though, to have the two of them right now.  

The couple sighed simultaneously, convinced that Cheryl won’t do anything…for now. “Okay, but you need to have your phone on you at all times, girl. Or you’ll see me barging in the doors of Thistlehouse with all the stuffed animals that I need to sleep.”

Cheryl laughed. “Okay, relax Josie. You’re not my mom.”

She mentally kicked herself. Her mom doesn’t even worry about her. And Josie and Archie sensed that that’s causing her anxiety so they tried to change the topic.

“Well, we’re also going to the Bijou to see a movie called Five Feet Apart after this. It’s about two sick kids who fell in love. I understand if you’re not up for that right now, you know but still. Come with us.” Archie offered a smile.

And who can say no to that smile. She needs this distraction.

 

* * *

 

Toni sighed. It was her turn to tend the bar tonight. And tonight has been the slowest. She knows better than to get drunk herself. It doesn’t feel nice, the thought of her and Cheryl being separated. But she’s convinced this is going to help them. Everybody needs a healthy amount of space. But fuck, that doesn’t mean she can’t miss her girl.

She understands why Cheryl doesn’t want to talk to her. In all honesty, Toni just wants Cheryl to realize that she is half of their relationship too. She just wants to start doing things for herself again. Not that she hates it when they do things together, it’s just…she’s starting to feel like she’s somehow lost herself in her relationship with Cheryl.

“You okay there, boss?” She heard Peaches from the opposite side of the bar.

“Yeah, just…Yeah.” She said because what’s the point?

“Okay then. But you must know, that someone’s been eyeing you all night. He’s looking at you like you’re a full course meal, boss.”

She looked at where Peaches was pointing and saw a tall, muscular man looking in her direction. He had a dirty smirk in his face and a bottle of beer on one hand. He pointed the beer in her direction and motioned to cheers.

“Ugh, gross. Get back to your post.”

The rest of the night went by smoothly, hardly any fights. The creepy dude kept on eyeing her all night. Toni doesn’t bother with him because she knows if he so does make a move on her, his face will be planted onto the nearest flat surface around.

Toni looked around. She couldn’t believe the last time she and her girlfriend were both here. They definitely debauched each and every flat surface in here. _On the counter…over the stage…the tables…Cheryl on a blindfold sitting on chair while she goes down of her…the sweet, sweet noises that come out of her girlfriend’s mouth with every touch…_

_What the fuck, Topaz? Stop._

She couldn’t help but miss her even more.

Toni can admit that she was a little hard on her girlfriend. Cheryl just wanted to spend some time with her and she shut her down. Cheryl walking in on her and Veronica singing didn’t make it better. Come to think of it, she is kind of an asshole on that bit. She should definitely talk to Cheryl and apologize for that. They were on a break but she’s still her girlfriend after all.

It was closing time when someone placed a hand over her shoulder. The people were clearing up and it’s time to lock up.

“What do you want?!” Toni asked hastily.

“Woah, relax I just want to tell you how I much I enjoyed staying at your speakeasy. I just moved here. I thought you were the manager.”

Having a closer look, Toni can’t say the boy was not good-looking. He had curly blonde hair and piercing blue eyes. “I’m not the manager. Veronica, that girl over there, talking to the bouncer, Reggie, she is the owner of this place. If you want to give compliments to the place, you should talk to her.” Toni said turning around, dismissing the efforts of the boy.

“Wait, I just want to…” The boy grabbed her arm and Toni looked at him sharply, contemplating if the faceplanting should be done now or a deep breath is necessary. “I just want to introduce myself.” He let go of her arm, (thankfully) and said, “I’m…”

“Leaving. You’re leaving. I’m not interested. Reggie!” She called the attention of the bulldog.

“It’s Tom, actually. But yeah, I’m gonna go. I’ll see you at school, Toni!” He said, leaving before Reggie could even get there.

Toni’s eyebrows furrowed. How could he possibly know her name? And _see you at school?_ Who the fuck was that? But he’s the least of her worries right now. She needs to talk to Cheryl.

 

* * *

 

“Are you sure you don’t want me to stay the night?” Josie offered a warm smile from the passenger side of Archie’s truck.

“I’m sure. Thank you both for that. I enjoyed my time. Who knew thirdwheeling was so fun, right?”

The couple laughed. “Okay, we’re gonna go now.”

“See you at school, Cher.” Archie waved. “Call if you need anything, okay?”

The redhead nodded. They drove away and Cheryl watched with a small smile on her face as it disappeared from the distance. She is alone again.

It was nice spending time with her friends, but nothing compares to the time she spent with Toni. So as she lay in bed that night, opening her phone and scrolling through a bunch of voice messages she couldn’t help but wallown in the sadness. Out of the bunch, there is one that she couldn’t absolutely get rid of. Hugging Toni’s pillow, she clicked on the screen of her phone, a tear slowly falling down the side of her face….

_“Cheryl, this is like, the tenth message I’ve left. Wherever you are, I hope you’re hearing this. My voice telling you that I’m right there, right by your side. You’re not alone, Cheryl. Not ever again.”_

_Where are you now Toni?_


	2. u shaped space

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> toni realizes cheryl thinks they broke up when they didn't and they talk...but just a little.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Where are my fellow archosie warriors at?
> 
> Also, more cheryl x archie interactions because i love my redheaded children. I feel like what they need aside from therapy is each other. I love a good brotp. I kind of wanted them to have this friendship where they talk about each other's traumas and yall know it's what they deserve. Also, this chapter is more Toni centric. I kind of wanna do a back and forth POV cuz u know i aint really picking any damn side.
> 
> also, can u tell i love camila cabello? chapter is kind of, a little based of THAT song.
> 
> So yeah. Without further ado.

Toni woke up today with a terrible back sore. She's slept in much horrible places before but she guesses it was because her lower class back got used to her girlfriend's super  _upper_  higher class' mattress. _Damn,_ Toni thought.

Despite that, she's sort of in an okay mood today. She's gonna try and talk to her girlfriend today, try to sort out things little by little. She does miss Cheryl.

It's crazy how a few weeks ago, she wants nothing but her own personal space, wants nothing but to establish herself, and do things for herself. But now all she wants is Cheryl. She misses all the little things about her girlfriend. Like how she never fails to give Toni a kiss in the cheek right after her morning jog. How she sleeps with her mouth slightly hanging open, not in a weird way but in the cutest possible way. How super obsessive she gets when studying for a test. How she takes care of her.  _God, she misses everything about her girlfriend._ Her smile, her laugh... _oh god, that sexy laugh. And those lips._ Toni still thinks it's illegal to possess such sexy and kissable lips. And the brunette knows exactly how they feel on her neck...on her stomach...on her— _oh sweet baby Jesus._

Toni's thankful the speakeasy has showers. For showering and...other things like, you know...trying to ease the tension.

 

* * *

 

Archie and Josie offered to pick her up to school. Cheryl said no. Not because she's trying to shut them out but she really, genuinely feels fine driving on her own. In fact, she's kind of warming up to the thought of going places alone. She was so used to having Toni with her that doing things by herself feels like new territory.

**Archie Andrews [6:55am]: are you sure, cher?**

**Me [6:57am]: yes, archie. I'm sure. I'll see you at school.**

It feels weird getting attention from people other than Toni. It's a weird feeling, but not at all unwelcomed.

She arrived at school a little earlier than she should and surprisingly enough, Josie was there before her. She waved, waiting for her at the front door.

"Hey you." She said, greeting her friend.

"Hey."

"Never thought I'd see the day Josie Mccoy become the early worm."

"Figured we could walk to class together. And hey! When was I ever late?" The brunette laughed as the two stepped foot inside the halls of Riverdale High.

"Um...Josie—"

"Yeah no, don't answer that."

The two girls laughed. Cheryl couldn't remember the last time she spent time with Josie and they just talked about what normal teenagers talk about, not like serial killers or weird board games that push people into suicide. Not her heartless mother sending her to conversion therapy.

She thinks she needs to do this more often.

When Cheryl got to her locker, Toni wasn't at hers, thankfully. It wasn't long until she felt Josie lurking behind her, with Archie in tow.

The redheaded boy walked the two women to where their first period is but not without Josie planting a 'see you later' kiss on Archie's cheek.

 

* * *

 

 

Toni sat with the Poisons during lunch. She thought it was weird seeing Cheryl, Archie and Josie sitting together. More importantly, she thinks it's weird seeing Cheryl laugh like that in front of anyone else but her. For a moment there, she felt jealousy bubbling in her stomach. But she does look good. It does look good on her.  _Happy looks good on Cheryl Blossom._

" _We've been through this, babe. Everything looks good on me."_

She didn't even realize she's zoned out and staring at her girlfriend creepily. Not until Peaches threw a fry on her face.

"Yo boss. When are you getting back with Red? We kind of like you more when you were together. The pining kind of does not look good on you."

"What do you mean?" Toni asked, throwing a french fry back at her.

"I mean, you both look miserable—"

"No, I mean…"  _oh shit._ Why the fuck is she just realizing this now? "You think we broke up?"

"Uh...didn't you? It's what everyone's been talking about. Hashtag choni is no more."

"No!" Toni exclaimed. "No. We didn't break up. We just needed to take a little break."

Peaches and the other Poisons looked at her like she grew a second head. "Uh, well that's not what everyone thinks?"

"What? She's still my girlfriend, it's just—we just...I just thought living together isn't the best for us right now."

_Of course, it's what everyone thinks. Wait, does Cheryl think—oh no, of fuck no._

Toni is standing up before she's fully aware that she is. There's nothing on her mind but Cheryl. Cheryl. Oh god, her girlfriend thinks they broke up. She needs to get to her girlfriend.

Still dazed, Toni's legs started moving and walking to where Cheryl is seated with Archie and Josie. Somewhere along the way, their eyes met and Toni knew what a scared Cheryl Blossom looks like. But before she could get there her view was blocked by tall figure.

"Toni."

It was the boy from last night, at the speakeasy. What the fuck does he want now? Irritated, Toni yelled. "What?!" She yelled a little too loud and now everyone's eyes is on her, including Cheryl's.

Toni looks at her. She looks at her while Josie whispered something in her ear and now the three of them were standing.  _Shit, they're leaving._

"What do you want, Tim?" She doesn't wanna seem like a bitch but boy, right now isn't really a good time for this.

"Um...it's Tom. And uh, I was just kind of saying hi?" He said, balancing the tray of food in front of her. "I don't really know anyone yet so I was kind of wondering if I could sit with you."

He interrupted her for this?! Toni isn't a bitch, but this shit is really fucking irritating. She was on her way to her girlfriend to clarify things and all this boy wants is to say hi?!

"Well, you really can't 'cause I sit with my gang and you're not exactly Pretty Poisons material so you're gonna have to find a different table, pretty boy."

He smiled at that. And god, does Toni want to wipe that stupid grin on his face right now with that stupid dimple on his right cheek using her fists. "You don't have to be a bitch about it, you know." His voice was mocking.

Toni rolled her eyes. "Are we done?"

"You're not gonna ask why I know you're name?"

"Would I like the answer?" Toni replied, folding her arms.

He chuckled, shaking his head.  _He's totally flirting with her._ And if he thinks this tactic is going to work on her, he's an idiot. "Don't worry, I'm not some psycho stalker. I asked one of the girls wearing the exact same jacket that you are."

Toni sighed exasperatedly, "Why are you so interested?"

"Maybe you remind me of someone."

Toni eyed the boy carefully again. He's really not bad in the eyes. He's actually really good looking. But having a second look at him, he kind of does look familiar. Like she's seen him before. Maybe the Southside?

But onto more important matters, she can't do this right now. She needs to figure out ways to talk to her girlfriend. They have the next period together. Okay, right, she's going to start there.

Toni left not even bothering to say another word to the boy.

 

* * *

 

 

"Hey, we still up for Pop's after class?" Josie asked.

After Toni's little outburst at the cafeteria, the brunette suggested that they leave, sensing both Cheryl's anxiety at the possibility of talking to Toni and curiosity to find out who was the guy she was talking to.

"Actually, I really have somewhere to be after class. After the red paladin quest, Mr. Lodge left me this really old gym at Seaside. The place needs a little more fixing and cleaning." Archie said. "You guys go without me."

Right. Archie has that thing...he went to juvie for a crime he didn't commit and got branded as sacrifice there. That's all Cheryl knows.

"What happened, Archie?"

"Well, me, Jug and Betty got the word out for all G&G players who have the quest to kill the Red Paladin that there is some kind of tournament. I have to beat them all at boxing to get them to give up their quest cards." The redheaded boy explained. "So yeah."

"Archie...I'm...I'm so proud of you." And Cheryl meant that. He was so busy checking in on her and Cheryl forgot he's got some stuff too. It wasn't easy what he went through, having a gun pointed straight to his head, rushing his father to the hospital, and god only knows what happened to him in juvie. "Let us help."

"What?" Archie laughed.

"Let me and Josie help. With your gym or boxing ring or whatever."

She saw Josie nod at her peripheral vision.

"The cleaning?"

"Yeah."

"Are you serious? Cheryl it's dirty there. Like really dirty."

"Come on we can totally order to go and then help you with whatever cleaning and fixing you need." Cheryl was giddy, which was new. She was rarely eager, especially when it comes to stuff that include dirt. But she's willing to help Archie, it's the least she could do. "Please?"

"Alright." The two girls squealed. "Just as long as you let me teach you how to box?"

 _Boxing, huh._ "I could totally make boxing hot." Cheryl replied, making the boy smile. "Okay, or as teenage boys like to say it, 'I'm down. I'm down, bruh."

"I'm gonna teach you some moves." Archie then proceeded to squeeze her arms. "You've got some muscle. We just have to enhance that."

Cheryl can see how ecstatic the boy is with teaching her to box.

"It's good self defense too."

After talking for a bit more and Josie saying bye to her boyfriend, Cheryl entered the class. The class that she shares with Toni. She tries to ease the anxiety by opening her phone and quickly exiting gallery so she could avoid looking at their pictures. She was scrolling through instagram mindlessly, reading posts about the recent gossip on Kylie Jenner and Khloe Kardashian when the door busted open revealing a very out of breath Toni. She tried averting her expression back on her phone, but Toni….she was in front of her.

"Cher."

Cheryl fixed her eyes on her phone like superglue. She didn't need this heartbreak right now.

"Cheryl, please look at me. Can we talk?"

The redhead can not only feel Toni's eyes on her but also the whole classroom's. And so slowly, she looked up, her face empty of any emotion.

She took a deep breath first. "Toni. What do you want?"

"I wanna talk, please. Outside." The brunette clutched her duffel bag harder on her chest.

"I'm not certain I can do that."

"Cheryl, please. Don't do this to me."

 _Don't do this to me._ Cheryl feels her blood literally boiling in her veins. She's going to go all HBIC on Toni, she can feel it.

"I'm not doing anything to you, Topaz."

Toni laughed bitterly. Is this what it has come to? All she wanted was her personal space. She's homeless, for Christ's sakes. She just wanted her old self back. She wants to call Cheryl childish, she wants to tell her how immature she's being. But she's not about to make a scene. Or start a scene herself. So she says, "Do you have anything to do after class? Let's grab a bite at Pop's before my shift."

"I have plans. Sorry."

"Cheryl...please." She's starting to get irritated. Because Cheryl had to do this to her. In front of everyone. Toni could even bet someone was recording their little exchange and posting it later in their instagram story with the hashtag "chonifight" hashtag "teamcherylblossom" hashtag "cherylblossomdefensesquad". And in all honesty, Toni feels like an idiot for getting rejected like that in front of everyone.  _An absolute fucking idiot._

Thank fuck Miss Fabray entered the room, diverting all the attention on her. Thank fuck she's careless and had scattered the papers she was carrying or Toni would've died of absolute awkwardness. She doesn't exactly know where to go from the zone where Cheryl had rejected her.

"Alright, alright. Settle down. Call me Edward Scissorhands…shame me. It's done." She said picking up the last piece of paper off the floor before looking at Toni. Toni blinked twice, thrice... _oh...oh shit._ "Miss Topaz! I said settle down."

The whole class laughed.

_Oh dear god, kill me now._

 

* * *

 

**Me [2:33pm] : cheryl let's talk please.**

**Me [3:15pm] : you clearly misunderstood everything. Just let me explain.**

**Me [3:16pm] : babe, let me explain.**

**Me [4:37pm] : i just wanna talk, cheryl. It's hard to explain here so please.**

**Me [5:01 pm] : babe, at least don't turn off your phone so i can call**

**Me [5:08pm] : i know you said you have plans but let at me at least call baby, please. You totally got it all wrong.**

Toni scrolled through the rest of the messages. The last text she got from Cheryl was from four days ago.

**Babe [11:34pm] : i miss you, tt. I want to be awake when you get home but my eyes feel incredibly heavy right now. Your dinner is in the microwave, heat it up if you get hungry. I love you. Get home soon, pls.**

And Toni wants to choke slam herself for her reply.

**Me [11:56pm] : don't wait up. Gang's staying for a few more drinks.**

"'Don't wait up _'?_ Really, Toni?!" She muttered to herself. "'Gang's staying for a few more drinks'?! What. The. Fuck. Got into you?!" She wants to beat herself. She doesn't know when or how she started to be a fuckboy.  _Because this shit, only a fuckboy would reply this kind of shit to their girlfriend, who wants to wait up for them and prepared dinner for them. You are an idiot, Topaz!_

She heard Peaches laugh beside her.

"What?"

"You got it bad, boss."

"Shut up."

"Why won't you get back with her already? I can tell it's killing you both."

"For the last time," Toni took a deep breath, "we're together. We're still together. We're just on a break."

"But why?"

She's never actually spoken to Peaches or other members of the gang about stuff like this. But like what she wants them to be, a sisterhood, maybe it's time to let her guard down around them. Like what she did when she was in the Serpents. "Because…we've been fighting a lot. And I moved out because I wanted my own personal space."

"And yet, you're the idiot bombarding her text messages and jumping up and down every time your fucking phone goes off." Peaches chuckled. "You're like a lost puppy waiting for her master."

Sometimes, this girl can really get on her nerves.  _Is that what she really looks like? Is that what she really does?_ "I just worry about her, okay? She isn't good with being alone. I'm her first real relationship."

"Probably why she thought you guys break up."

"Yeah."

"You still love her?"

"I really do." Toni said, looking down.

"Don't text her."

"Huh?"

"Don't text her. Just go talk to her. You blowing up her phone will just make her think that you want her back and that the break is over. If you wanna clarify things with her, just go talk to her. Tell her exactly what you want, that you guys aren't broken up, you just need a little break from each other."

Toni blinked twice. She couldn't believe Peaches was right. Maybe she has tolerated her girlfriend's need for attention a little too much. Instead of really talking to her about it, she kind of went off of it the wrong way. Dodging her was rude and childish. In her defense Cheryl did say some pretty hurtful things about their living situation when she tried to talk to her about her "loose canon behavior". And that's another thing she wants to talk to Cheryl about. Every time her mental health issue comes up or something about the same lines, she gets defensive. The past year hasn't been good for her poor girlfriend after all.

So maybe Toni could've done things differently. In hindsight, she knows she could've made a better choice. Maybe she should have said yes over that trip to Mont Blanc and rescheduled her roadtrip with the Poisons. She could have easily taken that chance to have a proper conversation with her girl. Maybe she should have reassured her that night she walked in on her karaoke thing with Veronica.

"You better hurry up, boss. If Red thinks you're broken up for another twenty four hours, she's gonna think it's really over. You better get your girl, boss, before I do." She teased.

Toni landed a solid punch on her arm.

"Ow! There's no need for that."

"Thanks, P."

"Anytime, boss."

* * *

 

"What's that smile for?"

Cheryl's lips couldn't help but curl wider at Archie Andrews' question towards her. She carefully placed her phone on her back pocket,  _Toni wants her back._  At that thought, her smile progressed into a full grown smirk. "Oh nothing, Archie. Where do you want these?" She said in the most innocent tone she can muster. That caught Josie's attention as well. The three of them have been cleaning for hours.

"You know I can't help but notice you always checking your phone. Is it Toni?"

Cheryl stopped in her tracks. There's no accusation on his tone at all but hearing Toni's name like that made her knees kind of wobble. Archie Andrews is reading her like an open book.

The redhead cleared her throat. "She's been...wanting to talk."

"Yeah?" Archie asked, taking another metal plate and moving it over to the neat stack at the corner.

Cheryl nodded. The redheaded boy sensed Cheryl's anxiety over the subject and he's not about to pressure her into talking about something that she's not comfortable with. "You know this still kind of amazes me." He said laughing. "You did everything. You sweeped and mopped the floors, you helped Josie wash the walls…"

The other redhead took a long breath. "Well, trust me, they made me do much worse things inside that hellhole for troubled youths…" She said before she even thought about it. She can feel her palms sweating against the material of her work gloves. She's never talked to anyone about what happened to her while she was with the sisters. It's just Toni…

"We don't have to talk about it if you're not comfortable." Archie said with another reassuring smile, which Cheryl reciprocated.

"I'm gonna go ahead and pick our food up from Pop's." Josie said catching both redheads' attention. She looked at them both for approval and of course, Cheryl had to say something.

"Don't worry, Josie. I only kissed Archie once, the turning point of my gayness. And as hot as I look right now…" She said pointing to her body. She wore a tight, worn out overall-shorts that she found deep inside her closet with a red cropped top inside that exposed her bare waist. "I'm done…." She slowly dragged out, pointing to Archie. "...playing for that team."

Josie couldn't help but chuckle. "I'm not worried…"

Cheryl raised an eyebrow at her best friend, which made the brunette giddy and flustered.

"But yeah, you do look hot." Josie said absentmindedly.

Cheryl gasped rather exaggeratingly, "Josie Mccoy, are you checking me out?"

Josie's eyes went wide. Of course, Cheryl's gonna tease her about it. She's actually kind of glad they're at that point where they can joke about Cheryl's tiny obsession over Josie. She did regret the things that she's done.

"Get out of here, girl."

Josie laughed and Archie watched the playful banter between the two girls awkwardly.

"Do I even need to ask?" Archie grumbles as he haphazardly threw his work gloves over the neatly stacked metal plates. The two laughed. "Square up, Blossom."

"What? Archie!" Confused, Cheryl followed Archie over to the ring.

It's like they've fallen into their own little world. Cheryl never thought spending time with Archie Andrews could be this good. Part of her misses Jason and wishes the two could meet. Jason will really like Archie. Another part of her is grateful. If Jason wouldn't have passed away, Archie wouldn't be there to save her that day at Sweetwater River.

And now she's slightly forgetting about the whole Toni fiasco. Boxing is really helping her focus her rage. Her heart soars at the praises that come out of Archie's mouth whenever she's done a perfect (Jab-Cross-Left uppercut-Cross). It's been a long time since she's been this validated and complimented.

After a good half an hour, the two found themselves lying on the floor of the boxing ring, staring at the ceiling, a comfortable silence surrounding them.

Yeah, she's a bit of a mess inside, Cheryl knows she's truly hard to handle. She can be too cruel at times and quick with her words, saying them before thinking about it. She used to be proud of it, using fear as a way for people to think about her. It feeds the attention monster inside her. But it's not like she's not trying to be a better person. When Toni came along, she did everything she could to be better, but she guesses it's easier to succumb to her flaws despite being aware that she might be doing things a little bit wrong.

She was a bitch to Toni when she brought up her girlfriend's living situation, she was a bitch to her when she moped around about the Poisons' new job for Veronica's speakeasy, and the most recent of them all, she was a bitch to her today at class.

"What's going inside that head, Cher?" Archie murmured, almost inaudibly.

"Just…things. You know, Archie, I never got to thank you, like properly thank you for everything that you've done for me."

Cheryl could feel Archie shaking as he chuckled. "It's cool." And then the two shared a long, charged look before they burst into laughter, remembering their little liplock last year. "So, you mind telling me what really happened between you and Josie?"

The other redhead buried her face on her arm, laughing. "Promise me you won't make fun of me?"

"Promise."

* * *

 

Toni just finished her shift at the speakeasy and it was nearing twelve midnight. Her motorcycle stopped at the gates of Thistlehouse. She carefully removed her helmet and hung it next to the cherry red one that she carries around for Cheryl. The brunette couldn't help but sigh. She hopes and she prays that this but all go well.

After another long breath, she pushed the doorbell and was surprised when Jane, Nana Rose's carer, answered seeing Cheryl's car parked there.

"Blossom Residence."

"Uh, Jane, where's Cheryl?"

"Oh she said she'll be out with her friends. Left the house before dinner. But she'll be back soon. Did you forget your key?"

Toni's jaw tightened. "Um, nevermind. I'll just wait for her here."

"Don't be silly I can let you in."

"No really, Jane. It's…It's…um…"

There was a silence and Jane going "oh" before Toni cleared her throat. "Okay, then."

She's cool. Toni's cool. She's gonna do this. She's rehearsed this thrice already at the speakeasy. She's gonna talk to her girlfriend and dismiss the information exactly how they are. No blurred lines, no mixed signals.

And surely not ten minutes later, a truck that seems to be Archie Andrews' stopped in front on the gates of Thistlehouse. Toni started shifting from foot to foot, adjusting her stance, a nervous habit that she acquired. It's been a solid minute and Toni guesses they are discussing carefully inside. In a way, she's happy Cheryl's got people now to protect her. She's proud her girlfriend is making an effort to establish relationships outside of their relationship. She just never knew Cheryl would need protection… _from her of all people._  The truck door open and there she is.

Toni had to squeeze her leg because Cheryl looked jaw-dropping with minimal make up, hair up in a bun, her tight overalls and the exposed skin of her waist. Toni swallowed a lump in her throat.  _No, sex didn't and wouldn't solve their issues._

She bid goodbye to Archie and Josie and then faced Toni. "Hey."

"Hey."

"I'm sorry about today, TT."

Man, the nickname made Toni's chest hurt. And Cheryl doesn't realize what she said.

"I didn't mean to embarrass you in front of the class."

And Toni believes that. She has to. She has to be the first person to believe her girlfriend. She knows that now.

"I texted you," Of all the possible words Toni could say, that's all she could muster, as if she didn't rehearse everything that she needs to say to Cheryl. She mentally kicks herself.

"Yeah, I was out with Archie and Josie." Cheryl said dismissively. Toni gets why she's being cold and dry right now to be honest. She deserved a kick in the head for her behavior lately. But she can tell Cheryl is waiting. Just waiting for her to apologize and beg to take her back in. And she's not about to do the latter.

"I'm sorry, Cher." And Cheryl waited. "But I'm not gonna stay here for much longer."

In all honesty, Cheryl wasn't surprised. She wanted Toni to stay and she's entertained the possibility. But after spending the day with Archie and Josie today, and boxing, some things changed for her.

"I…don't think you are."

Toni could see her eyes shining and  _oh how she wants to kiss those tears away._

"Cheryl…" She began, taking a few steps forward towards the redhead. "I'm really sorry for how I acted. I understand how you thought that I'm not your girlfriend anymore…I—I haven't been deserving of that title lately."

Cheryl kept her eyes on the ground, and Toni could only wonder the thoughts forming inside her girlfriend's head. She could clearly see the tears falling down from her face. So she got bold and placed both hands on either side of Cheryl's face wiping her tears with the pad of her thumb. "Look at me." Toni said, carefully tilting Cheryl's face so that their eyes could me. Cheryl tried harder to avert her gaze as more tears fall from her eyes. "Hey. Shh…"

It's K.O. for Cheryl. She's cornered and she couldn't bother to put her fists up for defense. Because Toni is here, she's here. And she's being thoroughly tender and loving.

"I should've chased you…that night. I knew I should've tried harder. I didn't realize sooner that you'd think you could actually lose me. No, not as easy as that. I…I've been a coward, Cher. I'm so sorry." The brunette said, "I didn't consider your feelings and your efforts, and I should have. And I'm so sorry."

"We're not—You…" Cheryl said in between sobs.

"Shh..Yeah, we didn't break up, okay? We're just taking some time apart. This is temporary, babe…"

"But why?"

"Because we need it. I…I need it."

At that Cheryl stepped away at Toni's hold. "So that's—that's it, Toni? Only you get to decide when you want to be in my life and when…when you don't?"

Toni was at a loss of words. The redhead turned around, shaking her head and ready to leave.

"Wait—wait, Cheryl. Please." Toni tried reaching for the redhead's arms but it was carefully slapped away by Cheryl.

"That's…not fair, Toni." She retorted, wiping her own tears. "You should go."

The brunette then frustratingly ran a hand over her hair.

"Toni…" Cheryl said in a much calmer, even voice. "You should go. It's late. Let's talk tomorrow."

"Really?"

"Really."

"Good night, Toni."

Toni watched Cheryl disappear inside Thistlehouse, the house that they once claimed their own, with the regret that for the second time, she didn't chase after her, but also with the hope that tomorrow,  _tomorrow_ could bring them closer to okay. Cheryl is open to discuss things. That's what's important.

They're gonna be okay.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again! So there u have chapter 2.
> 
> Thank u for the kind reviews btw.
> 
> I kind of wanted Cheryl's development to be slow as she carefully address her issues one by one. And as for Toni, girl realized she screwed up already.
> 
> And as for the requests, just know that I see you all and I'll try to incorporate what I can. So keep em coming. This is my take on what happened and also, what I want to happen so u know, keep the criticisms as constructive as possible lmao, I'm a child.
> 
> I'll probably be updating every other day now and I'm still deciding on the number of chapters.
> 
> Also, I don't proofread lmaoo. hmu


	3. all i'm left with is this scar tissue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cheryl’s mental health issues get the best of her. She acknowledges Toni’s living situation. Slight progress for Choni.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slight mentions of suicide, rape and traumatizing things. Not that much tho.
> 
> Guys, I’m trynna recruit you into the camila army lmao. Title and chapter is based on the song. It’s really really good. Like try to listen after this chapter and your heart will break even more.
> 
> Cheryl centric cuz you know i do that shit. This chapter revolves around the two of them and their relationship in general. So yeah. Enjoy the angst fest.

Of course.

Of course the shoe drops.

Cheryl Blossom have spent every single day of the past year in total disbelief that she gets to have Tonibecause she has never been the person that lucky things happen to. And truthfully, she’s fully aware having Toni is the closest to lucky that she will ever get. And then there they were, she’s free of her mother’s clutch, they’re living together and everything was happy. For once, Cheryl was happy. _Toni Topaz and Cheryl Blossom are living together_  which just… Her life was so good.  _Their_  life was so good, it was so amazing.

And for once she thought maybe the shoe isn’t dropping. Maybe there’s no shoe at all and the concept was just a lie she was forced to believe growing up due to the abuse her parents subjected her to...

But of course. Of course the shoe drops.

Her mother was right.

Maybe she really was a starving, emotional anorexic. And she fed on Toni. The poor girl has been subjected to carry all her emotional baggage. Cheryl Blossom was _damaged_.

And maybe, maybe Toni deserves more. She deserves more than her. She deserves more than an emotional wreck. And she knows she must apologize for using their living situation as an ultimatum because Cheryl knows. She knows about Toni’s past experiences with couch surfing, knows how young the brunette was when she lost her parents, her stories with social services and how literally every relative basically gave her away as if she wasn’t a human being capable of feeling rejected, as if she was a thing, a property. Maybe that’s how she’s been treating Toni lately, _her property._

But having experienced all that, Toni never did make it seem like it affected her. She faced the world headstrong and proud. It’s one of the many reasons why Cheryl admires her. Feeling unwanted growing up was something that she shared with Toni, and yet they handle things differently.

When she feels as if a threat is surrounding something that she cares about, Cheryl is conditioned to do something about it. That’s where their differences lie. Cheryl has to try, because she is _that_ girl. She’s _the girl who has to work hard for people to stay_ in her life. And most of the time, she doesn’t think about it before she’s moving on her feet.

So she doesn’t blame Toni. Not at all.

She is hurt, that’s given. But she doesn’t blame Toni.

And maybe…just maybe a real break up would solve things. Free Toni once and for all, even though she’s made it clear she’s just moving out, they’re not breaking up.

But the more Cheryl thought about that while she slept in Toni’s purple flannel last night, the more it didn’t make sense. _She just needs a break but it’s not a break up. What does that even mean? What do they can and can’t do while they’re on a break?_

She’s not even gonna lie to herself about missing Toni anymore. The moment she saw the clothing article haphazardly thrown over the laundry basket as she was putting out her own clothes for the helper to wash, her heart sank as she burst into tears. Her immediate response was to smell it. And god, it still smells like her.

How could they fix this? Is this still fixable? She has managed to screw things up like she always has. How could she tell Toni how incredibly sorry she is for the things that she’s said?

_She just needs a break but it’s not a break up._

_She just needs a break but it’s not a break up._

_She just needs a break but it’s not a break up._

_You’re not breaking up_

She chants in her head over and over until fatigue took over her.

 

* * *

 

 

“Cheryl.” A voice called her.

The redhead turned around to find out the voice belonged to no other than Veronica Lodge.

It was a terrible thing to admit. But sometimes, Cheryl just wants to punch Veronica square in the face. Like for no reason at all. Not because Veronica is the type of “friend” who acts like she cares so much about you once and then proceeds to dismiss you for the rest of your life. Not because of the utter humiliation she felt when she decided to sing that stupid song with Toni while not inviting her that night to the speakeasy.

Just for no reason.

She’d bet Archie will be proud of her when he sees the proof of the solid right hook she’d land on the Latina’s face.

But okay no, maybe another time. Not when they’d just finished Vixens’ practice and everyone was just fucking waiting for her to lose her shit and go batshit crazy from the second it began. Especially since, Toni wasn’t at practice.

“If it isn’t Veronica “Call Your Girlfriend” Lodge.” Cheryl said bitterly. “I’m afraid I couldn’t squeeze you in my schedule today. But it was a nice try.”

“Cheryl, wait.”

“What do you want, Veronica?” The redhead snapped, catching everyone’s attention, including Betty Cooper’s.

To say the brunette was shocked at her friend’s reaction was an understatement. She totally was clueless. “What’s your problem?”

“Trust me, Veronica. You _don’t_ wanna go there. So please, do me one and leave me alone?”

“Okay, whatever issue it is that you have with Toni, I’m not part of it, so calm down.” There it is. Cheryl knew Veronica wasn’t _that_ clueless. “Look, I came to apologize for what you walked in on. I swear it doesn’t mean anything. To me or to Toni. It was a just a stupid dare that I couldn’t say no to because of all the help the gang is giving me.”

Cheryl laughed bitterly. “You don’t even get it, do you? Just forget it, Veronica.” The redhead said with finality, gathering the rest of her things and stuffing them inside her bag.

She sees Veronica shake her head. “Do you even have any idea where Toni is staying at right now?”

At that Cheryl froze. _Please no._ She doesn’t want to know. Not because she doesn’t care but because she does. She really, really does. A super unhealthy amount of it.

“She’s staying at the speakeasy.” _Shit, Veronica._ “That’s where she lives.”

And there it is. The guilt. It rushed over her like a hungry lion pouncing on it pray. It’s eating her alive. It was nothing Toni didn’t want that’s for sure. That’s exactly where she was going when she said that them living together was “too soon”. She just gave the final word. But still.

“That’s where she sleeps. That’s where she showers, eats…”

 _Okay, that’s enough._ “Shut up.”

“No, Cheryl. I want you to know. It hasn’t been easy for her…”

“And do you think it’s been easy for me?! Veronica, you don’t know what you’re saying so please, just shut the _fuck_ up. And you know what this is actually so confusing for me because I can’t really remember the last time you cared about anyone other than yourself! Since when did you care about Toni or me? Or our relationship? Toni wanted to move out. She wanted to move out, okay?” _Oh, god no. Please not now._ But she couldn’t hide it anymore. Her voice is cracking, and there’s that sting in her eyes. And more words are coming out of her mouth. She doesn’t exactly know how she feels, angry...hurt…anxious? All of them at the same time? “You don’t have any idea how hard it is for me, Veronica, because _I wanted Toni to stay._ I thought our life was perfect and that she was happy living with me. But turns out, she’s not! And I’m _this_ close to losing my shit entirely trying to think about why. What reason could she possible have that trumps over…over her promise to me? She wanted to leave me. She wanted to leave all of it behind, everything…after everything.”

Suddenly she feels her throat closing up. Her heart was pounding loud in her chest. She couldn’t breathe, the room felt like it’s spinning. She was trembling and she fears losing balance. Her legs suddenly felt like jelly and couldn’t support her weight anymore. Thankfully, Veronica was quick on her feet, catching her before her body connected to the floor

“She’s having a panic attack…call Toni.” She heard Veronica say, although it’s not that clear.

Slowly, she started shaking her head. Toni _can’t_ see her right now, not like this.

“Okay, okay, bombshell. Stay with me, now? Don’t lose consciousness. Breathe with me, okay? Cheryl. Cheryl, look at me.” The brunette said palming the redhead’s face. “Look at me. Slowly, okay?”

Cheryl could feel herself sweating. She has never done this nor experienced this before. It felt like…it feels exactly like when she was drowning in Sweetwater River. _No, no, no, no._ Her breathing doubled in pace while she squeezed her eyes shut. _Cold, cold ice. And then cold, rough hands on her thighs going higher and higher…no. No, please no. What the hell is happening?_

“Cheryl, please. Open your eyes.” She heard another voice. A much calmer voice. _Cold metal cuffs as she feels the needle go through her skin._ “Baby, open your eyes for me please.”

She forced her eyes open. Slowly at first and then catching a glimpse of pink hair, she looked at her. _Toni._ She’s here. She came. Cheryl doesn’t know whether to be happy or anxious at that.

“Hey, baby.” Toni offered her a smile. “Inhale and exhale slowly for me.” She placed her hands on either side of the distraught redhead’s face replacing Ronnie. And it’s that familiarity…there’s some comfort over that. Suddenly she feels safe. Whenever Toni holds her face like that before she kissed her or before she tells her she loves her, it makes her feel like she’s the most precious thing on earth. “Deep breaths, okay Cher?”

Cheryl tried. Of course, because it’s Toni. And then her throat started feeling like it’s not on chokehold anymore. Toni slowly pressed her forehead over Cheryl’s while caressing her face with the pad of her thumbs. “That’s it. That’s my girl.”

“T—Toni..”

“Shhh…shh, focus on your breathing, Cher. Okay? I’m here.”

And Cheryl wants to cry at that. It’s crazy how she craved this girl and now…and now she’s here.

“Okay, okay. Um…” Toni tries to think of a way to get Cheryl out of her own head. “Tell me…tell me three things that you love to do. Like the first things that come to your mind.”

“Y—You…”

Toni slightly laughs at that. “Well, it’s a good thing I feel the same about you. Two more, babe.”

“B—Boxing…boxing with Archie.” She’s catching up to her breaths now, slowly.

“Okay. That’s good, baby.”

“Archery…”

The proud grin that took over Toni’s face was enough for Cheryl to calm down completely. This was something new and it terrified the living shit out of her. She’s never had a panic attack before. She’s never had flashbacks like that. She’s had a couple of nightmares, sure, but never as frightening as that.

“I knew you could do it.” The brunette said, planting a small kiss on top of the redhead’s head. And then…and then she felt arms wrapping around her waist. _Oh, it’s been so long._ Slowly, she raised her arms and wrapped it around Toni’s small shoulders.

“You’re okay.” She heard Toni whisper. “You’re okay…”

 

* * *

 

 

Cheryl refused to go to the nurse. She thinks it’s not necessary since it really was the first time that that happened to her, but Toni and Veronica have her by both her arms already, ready to drag her to the clinic.

They had to make sure it was just a panic attack and nothing more. Panic attacks should be taken seriously. They were just being sure. _Toni_ …Toni had to be sure.

“Toni, stop overreacting. I’m fine. And stop pacing, please, I’m not dying of terminal illness.” She said rolling her eyes.

But that didn’t stop the brunette, furrowing her eyebrows more instead. “That’s not funny, Cheryl!”

“What do you want me to say??” The redhead quickly retorted.

“Okay! Can we all calm down and wait for the results?” Veronica cut in. “Cheryl, this is kind of protocol, so…and Toni’s right. We have to make sure.”

 _Make sure of what?_ Cheryl snorted but okay, she’s gonna let Veronica have that, although seeing the two of them together still makes her blood boil…fine, she was a teensy bit jealous, okay? But that’s all she can admit.

After all, Veronica’s still here. And she looks like she’s worried for real. It makes Cheryl a little guilty for going off on her earlier although, she still believes she has every right to. Veronica hasn’t been a good friend to her lately. Only talking to her when she needs something…excluding her in a lot of things.

The nurse coming in took all of their attention.

“Alright, Miss Blossom, you had your first panic attack today. There seems to be clear signs for heart disease. Your lungs sound fine and you don’t seem to have any more trouble breathing. Your temperature is normal, BP is normal…you’re fine physically speaking.”

Cheryl held a proud smirk at the nurse’s words. “See. I told you.”

“But we think it’s better to get help now before things get worse, so I scheduled you a session with the school’s guidance counselor this afternoon…”

“What?! No! You can’t do that. I’m not going.”

“Cheryl.” Toni’s voice was firm and final.

“No.” Cheryl made sure her tone was more firm than Toni’s.

“Cheryl.” She could see the brunette’s jaw clenching. “Ronnie, can you please excuse us. I need to talk to Cheryl alone. Nurse Lee, thank you for all your help.”

The nurse nodded and politely complied.

“Ronnie.” Cheryl called before Veronica could exit. “Thanks.”

Veronica nodded before giving her a small smile.

Now the two are alone. Toni sat on the bed with Cheryl, just a few inches away from the redhead. She felt Cheryl stiffen so she kept her distance. She doesn’t exactly know how to go through this with her girlfriend. She’s only gets to hold Cheryl to comfort her on nights she gets the nightmares. She doesn’t know half of what it feels like, but she’s gonna damn well try.

“Toni, I’m not going.” The redhead said before she could even say something.

The brunette took a frustrated sigh. “Cheryl, why won’t you just let us help you?”

“I don’t need help! I’m fine on my own. I always have been.”

“Does this look fine to you, Cheryl? I have been tolerating this ever since we got together and I’m done, okay? I’m not gonna let you do this to yourself, or to anyone else!”

“And there it is! Fine.”

“What?”

Toni hates this. She hates this with everything that she has. She hates it when they have to hurt each other like this. They’re full on arguing again. It’s like...like nothing works anymore.

“There is your reason for leaving. I can’t believe—I can’t believe I’m hearing this.”

“No! No, okay? You’re not gonna do this right now. You know damn well why I decided to move out and it’s not because of this. _You_ asked me to move in, remember? But as soon as I felt as if you are holding that over my head, I knew I had to bounce. And you know what? That hurts me. And maybe I act around like I’m used to it, used to people throwing me away _like garbage_ when they don’t want me anymore, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t really hurt me. Nobody wanted me, okay?”

“I wanted you! I still do!” Cheryl sobbed. “Toni, I’m sorry about everything. I’m sorry for holding your living situation over your head. I shouldn’t have done that. I just got scared…I thought—I’m just…there’s really no excuse over that. I’m so sorry. And I understand why you left…I learned my lesson.” Toni wanted to move, do something. She just can’t sit there while her girlfriend cried. She wants nothing more than to hold her, but it’s like she’s stuck. _“Please, please come back._ Please, Toni. I can’t— _”_

“Hey, hey…It’s okay. Would you like for me to hold you? Is that okay?”

The redhead nodded. And with that the two girls moved closer to each other. They maneuvered until Cheryl could fit her head on Toni’s shoulder. It’s always a lost cause for Toni. A crying Cheryl Blossom has always been her weakness.

“Cher…I—I can’t. I still think we needed this space.” She said as softly as possible. She took Cheryl not flinching away as a good sign, the redhead was ready to listen to her. So she took another deep breath. “But that doesn’t mean I’m not here for you, okay? I’m still gonna be here for you. But trust me, babe. Do you trust me?” The brunette pulled away slightly to look at Cheryl as the redhead nods. “I think we need to work on ourselves first before we’re ready to take that commitment.”

“W-What do you mean?”

“I mean, me working on myself…like holding a job that actually supports me, doing things for myself. And you…I have been feeling concerned about you for a while now.” Toni started. “Cher…how do you feel?”

The redhead tried to avert her gaze once again. She’s not prepared for wherever this is headed.

“Hey,” Toni tried again, “it’s me.”

“I’m feeling fine, Toni…”

“Really?”

“N-No.”

“Okay…why?”

Cheryl took a deep breath. “I’m…It was weird.”

“What was?”

“Earlier…during my panic attack. I felt as if…I felt as if I was back there.”

“Where, Cher?” The brunette prompted patiently. She makes sure she’s being soft on her girlfriend as to not make her feel uncomfortable.

“Sweetwater river.”

Toni’s eyebrows furrowed as she took a breath. _Damn._ She knew something was wrong. They’ve been together for almost a year now and she’s just now paying attention to this.

“A-And that night with…with Nick. And the sisters…”

“What do you mean, babe?”

“I just started…seeing pictures. Like flashbacks. I don’t even know…I haven’t…”

“This is why I think…getting help form the counselor is what you need, babe. I can listen to you, and hold you while you cry, but I may not say the correct words to you, words that you need to hear. I am not really...equipped for that. I love you very much.” Toni paused as she planted another kiss on top of her girlfriend’s head. “You are very special to me and I’d like to help you the way you would help me.”

“Toni, I’m scared…”

“I know, I know. It can be scary. But just…go this once. And we won’t have to go again if you think it’s that terrible, okay?”

“O-Okay…”

“Okay?”

“Okay.

“Thank you, baby.”

 

* * *

 

 

As promised Toni dropped Cheryl off to her appointment to the guidance counselor after class. It was nearing four in the afternoon and she was making her way back to the office to see Cheryl after and ask her how it went when she saw Jughead Jones and Betty Cooper talking to someone near Weatherbee’s office. Toni couldn’t make it at first but as she walked closer she saw that it was the Tom guy. _What could they possibly be talking about?_

She saw Jughead put a hand over his shoulder and tap it before he laughed while Betty gave him a smile. Toni then diverted her attention from the trio and adjusted her purple jacket when she saw Betty looking in her direction. She gave another brave glance over them and saw Jughead and Betty bid goodbye to him.

There’s still something so familiar about that boy. It’s slightly driving Toni insane that she can’t really put her finger on it.

“Hey, you in trouble?” Toni gasped, surprised that the boy was beside her already

“No just…waiting for my girlfriend.” She tried to be polite.

“Girlfriend? You guys are back together?” And he’s doing that thing again. With that stupid dimple.

Toni clenched her jaw. “We were _never_ broken up.” She said with gritted teeth. She’s really getting tired of having to tell people that. What is it to them anyway? “Wait, how do you know about Cheryl and I?”

“Well, being the school’s shining new toy doesn’t necessarily exclude me from all the _hot goss_ that’s been going on.” He said dramatically. Toni chuckled at that.

“How’s your first week been?”

“Meh.”

“It gets better.” She assured him.

“Well it certainly got better for you, bagging HBIC Cheryl Blossom. Why wouldn’t it get better for you?” He teased. “I can’t exactly just date, I don’t know, um…Archie Andrews? Or Reggie Mantle.”

Toni laughed. “Well, I didn’t date Cheryl just for that. But yeah, it comes with perks.”

“So unfair.”

“Hey, how do you know Jughead and Betty?” The brunette couldn’t help but ask.

Tom paused for a second. “Um…I was kind of thinking about joining the Blue and Gold.”

“Oh.”

Then, the door opened revealing a very emotional Cheryl. Her eyes were tear stained. She looks sad, but gorgeous nonetheless. Toni was relieved when the redhead gave her a small smile. Maybe it went well.

“Hey, you.” Toni greeted.

“I’ll see you later, _Tiny.”_

_Wait, what?_

The boy disappeared before Toni could even say anything. Then, she feels Cheryl come close. Toni proceeded to give her girlfriend a hug

“How was it?”

“It was…okay.”

“Will we be going back?” She asked with a little enthusiasm. She feels Cheryl nod against her shoulder. “I’m so proud of you.” Toni leaned back. And suddenly, their face was close. _Too close._ Like impossible to not kiss her close. The brunette’s gaze fell to where her girlfriend’s lips are. _God, it’s been what? Almost a week?_

She can tell Cheryl wants it too. And she’s just nothing but a supportive girlfriend.

In her mind, Toni’s scared. She doesn’t know how it’ll affect their supposed “break”. But then again, they’re still girlfriends. Toni just moved out. She can still totally kiss her girl.

And so she does it, like she usually does. Hands on her girl’s cheek, while Cheryl’s arms wrapped around her neck. It wasn’t rushed or fueled by anything. She’s just proud of her girlfriend’s decision despite her reservations. If the whole school find out Cheryl Blossom is seeking counselor help, she knows it’ll be bad for her girl’s rep.

 _Fuck, they both missed this._ But Toni knows they couldn’t take it too far. So she decided to pull back after allowing herself another peck.

“I love you.” Cheryl muttered, eyes still closed. “I never got to say it back, earlier…when you said it. “

Toni smiled.

“Thank you for doing this for me.”

“Of course, babe. Thank you for agreeing. I know it’s not that easy for you. You don’t know how proud I am.”

And then Cheryl started tugging the material of Toni’s poisons jacket. “Wh-Who was that, babe? The one you were talking to earlier?”

“Oh? That? Um, apparently his name is Tom. New kid. I don’t even know much. I met him at the speakeasy last night.”

It’s as if Toni could hear the cogs turning inside of her girlfriend’s head. “Hey, do you trust me?”

It took Cheryl a second before responding. “Of course, TT.”

“’Kay, let me drop you off at home before work.”

“Actually, babe, can you drop me off at Seaside?”

“Seaside? Why?”

“To Archie’s gym. He’s been teaching me how to box.”

The brunette raised an eyebrow at her. “Boxing huh.” And Toni swallowed at the thought of Cheryl in a boxing outfit. _Tight boxing shorts that hugs her perfectly carved ass, a black tank top that exposes her long, slender arms…_ But no, no, no, no sex can wait. _It can wait._ Toni literally shook her head, which made Cheryl laugh.

“Let’s go, you horndog. I know what you were thinking.”

The redhead walked to the entrance, but not without swaying her hips a little extra for Toni to see.

This girl will be the death of her.

 

* * *

 

 

**Babe [11:57pm] : Thank you for today, TT.**

**Me: [11:58 pm] : thank you too, baby.**

**Babe: [12:00am] : see you tomorrow at school.**

**Me: [12:01am]: see you, princess. Go get some sleep.**

Toni sighed before locking her phone.

“You sure you’re okay here, T?” She heard Veronica said while the lights turn off. “You are still welcome to join Betty and I at the Pembroo—“

“I’m sure, Ronnie.” Toni reassured her, giving her a polite smile as she tugs the duvet over her.

“Hey, now that Reggie’s…gone. I’m thinking about making you my right hand woman.”

Toni looked at the Latina with her eyebrows raised.

“Don’t worry, you’re basically doing his job since he went completely MIA last monday. What I mean is a “salary raise”…

“Oh.” Renting a small apartment is the first thing that came to Toni’s mind with that. Maybe finally she can have her _own_ place.

“Night, T.”

“Night.” The brunette said with a smile on her face. The smile got bigger after hearing another ding from her phone.

But to her surprise, it’s not Cheryl.

**Unknown number [12:05 am]: Good night, Tiny. See you at school tomorrow.**

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, i’m back. So yeah, progress. Lemme know what u think please. I’m begging u all. Validate me. Lmao jk but seriously tho violent reactions are welcome. 
> 
> Just take it easy on me, i think. 
> 
> I see all the requests, and guys, I’ll try.
> 
> I’m serious about the song tho. It’s called scar tissue by camila cabello. Now is the perfect time to listen.  
> :)


	4. aint no cryin in the club

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> toni makes up with her old friends. cheryl boxes. i’m sorry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay whew, i just know i had to post this before they make up in tonight’s episode. 
> 
> whew
> 
> whew
> 
> whew 
> 
> i just uh...gotta apologize for this. this shit HURTED
> 
> I promise choni!ENDGAME. I just went thru a lot of shit today and i had to let it out. Lmfaooo :( jk

**JnMe: good morning, cher. I’ll see you at school today?**

Toni smiled nervously to herself as she locks her phone, hiding in in her back pocket. Yesterday was a good day for her and for Cheryl. Although they are still in limbo, Toni thought it’d be best to address the issues one by one. She’s always been a woman of strategy after all. So what if she’s made the wrong choices initially? The battle is not yet lost and god, does Toni hate losing…

Her heart skips a beat when her phone dinged.

**Babe [7:56am] : morning, tt. Of course.**

And even though it was short and she feels kinda stupid, she doesn’t stop the smile forming on her face. It was like when they were still getting to know each other. Toni couldn’t explain it, how there are…butterflies in her stomach. And she laughs, _how stupid does she sound now?_

“It’s either the cot at the speakeasy is growing on you or a certain redhead that shall remain nameless is making you all gooey and smiley this morning.”

Toni jumped, not expecting Veronica Lodge to be spying on her this early in the morning.

“But, I’m betting on the latter.” She gives Toni a small wink. “What’s the matter with you, T? You seem jumpy.”

Toni rolled her eyes, laughing nervously before closing her locker door and walking past Veronica. She tries not to think about the text she received last night from that unknown number. _It’s probably nothing._

“Speaking of…” the Latina caught up to her, “How is Cheryl?”

“She’s…I don’t know Ronnie. I dropped her off at Archie’s gym yesterday. Apparently, he’s been teaching her how to box. And then I only texted her good night last night and then good morning this morning. Other than that, it’s still pretty much the same. You should ask her yourself though. She’d like that.”

“Hold up. Rewind. Archie has a gym?”

Toni stops for a hot second. She doesn’t know why but it feels kind of awkward discussing _exes_ with Veronica. Don’t get her wrong, the Latina has been nothing but good to her. But having girl friends is still kind of new to her. She’s not used to having ‘girl talk’. Being in a gang and growing up with Sweet Pea and Fangs, they really didn’t discuss things like this.

“Um, yeah. I don’t really know much about that. I just know that it’s old and dirty. And they’re kind of fixing it. It’s where Cheryl spends her free time.”

Veronica narrowed her eyes, as if she was in deep thought. The silence kind of felt awkward, so she cleared her throat.

“So, Archie and Cheryl, huh.” Veronica chuckled.

“Couldn’t believe it at first either. It’s just kind of like you and me, you know…”

“I’m not sure what you mean, Antoinette.”

Sometimes…sometimes Toni thinks the universe has some unknown grudge over her, like she’s really doing a good job pissing off whoever’s up there because she’s now passing in front of Sweet Pea and Fangs who are both by their lockers, discussing something. She tries not to look at them, and she finds herself internally squirming because the two serpents have noticed her presence and are now standing like they are waiting for her.

She hears Ronnie clear her throat behind her. “I’ll catch up with you later.”

Toni swallowed before looking at the two boys, their expression unreadable. The last time they had seen each other was when Toni and Cheryl got kicked out of the Serpents, which was…a long time ago. Toni couldn’t even remember exactly how long. And then when she’d told Jughead that another serpent has Fangs by his legs hanging and ready to drop him from the second floor.

She feels her stomach hurt. These are her best friends and now, now their staring at each other awkwardly neither party knowing what to say or who to speak first. But she can feel they both want to talk.

“I’m sorry.”  “We’re sorry.” The three said simultaneously, before bursting into laughs.

It was weird but Toni can feel her eyes water while her laughter dies. And she tries to stop herself because…well, because they don’t usually do this…being soft with one another. Her friendship with these two isn’t anywhere near the word “soft”. And then she looks at Sweet Pea and Fangs to see their eyes watering too.

Toni lands a light punch over each of the two boys’ arm. “Come on, you big babies.” They didn’t need big explanations or grand gestures, Toni just knows…she just knows they’re okay.

“Your  jacket looks cool.” She hears Fangs comment.

“Oh I know you lowkey dig it, Fangs.” Toni just smirks.

“Do you think maybe you could…I don’t know set me and Pea up with two of your girls. They’re kind of hot.”

At that, Toni laughs. “Oh I don’t know…some of them aren’t really into men.” She said still chuckling. “Yeah, didn’t they…I don’t know…beat you guys up?”

“We were outnumbered!” Sweet Pea deadpanned. “Plus, I was not about to hit girls…”

The brunette raised an eyebrow at him. “Right…”

“They were very good, not gonna lie. But I’m still going with that, okay?”

“He couldn’t walk straight for days.” Fangs whispered.

“Shut up, Fangs.”

Damn, she missed laughing with them and talking about absolutely nonsense things. It was great being surrounded by female energies and all, but it did require a lot of self-pep talk on Toni’s side. She’s never really been the girly girl and spending time with these guys, it just feels so free and so _her._

And although they’re wearing different jackets now and representing different gangs, it doesn’t seem to bother Toni. These are her guys after all.

“Listen Toni, we’re sorry about Cheryl.” Sweet Pea placed a hand on her shoulder.  “But on the bright side, now that you’re not locked up in that extravagant joke for home anymore, you get to spend time with your real buddies again.” He said, playfully slapping Toni’s shoulder.

The brunette wanted to object, say Thistlehouse was far from all that, say it did kind of felt like it was her and Cheryl’s home…well, at first. And ‘locked up’? It sounded a lot more terrible coming from someone else’s mouth. Now she kind of understands why Cheryl snapped at her when she said, _“I can’t spend all my time cooped up in that house…_ **_your_ ** _bedroom.”_

But of course, she didn’t. Instead, she laughs. Toni wants to hit her head with Cheryl’s five inch Louboutin’s.

The guilt of not defending her girlfriend, if you can call it that, sat in her stomach for a solid minute until, the universe played with her again because now she sees Cheryl walking the halls with Archie Andrews beside her. The guilt doubled and now she actually wants to fucking throw up.

She wants to avoid Cheryl so bad she’s internally panicking. Because they are making their way here and Sweet Pea and Fangs seem to be having fun watching her squirm. She gives them her best death glare as the two continue to mock her.

The redhead doesn’t seem like she’s in the mood either so she gracefully passes in front of them but of course, of fucking course…Sweet Pea and Fangs had to do something.

“Hey, Red.” Sweet Pea called.

Both Archie and Cheryl stop and look at them, confusion in their faces.

“My friend Toni says hi.” He adds, and then together with Fangs, burst into laughter.

To her surprise, Cheryl didn’t say anything she just looked…sad. And it did break Toni’s heart, seeing Cheryl so broken like that. She didn’t say a witty rebuttal or roll her eyes, instead Archie started advancing towards Sweet Pea, a rough expression on his face.

“Woah, Andrews.” The raven haired boy raised both his hands in surrender, while Fangs stiffen beside him. “Relax, it was a joke.”

Cheryl was quick to put a hand over Archie’s shoulder as Toni was on her feet coming in between the two boys either. She didn’t realize her relationship with Cheryl was that strong already. Part of her is happy that Cheryl’s found someone who’ll protect her. Her girlfriend did crave a brotherly love like when Jason was still alive. But also, a huge part of her is jealous. _So fucking jealous,_ that another person gets to defend her girl. She also wants to defend Cheryl. _But from whom? Herself?_

“It wasn’t funny.” The redheaded boy said with gritted teeth.

Cheryl looks at her like she’s waiting for her to say something but it feels like her tongue got stuck at the back of her mouth. _Shit, Topaz._

“Hey, Archie. It’s fine. Let’s just go.” She said, rubbing his shoulder comfortingly.

Toni looks at his face and she wants to shiver physically  at the icy glare the boy’s giving Sweet Pea. And then suddenly, he turned to her. “Restrain your friend, Topaz.” Those were his final words to the trio before he dragged a very sad Cheryl with him.

“Damn it, Pea.” Toni lets out a frustrated sigh, rubbing her forehead. “Things are fucked up as it is.”

“I’m sorry, Tiny. I didn’t know it was that serious. I thought she was going to say something like she used to when I teased her.”

“Well.” The brunette shrugged.

“What happened, Toni?” Fangs asked.

“I…said the exact same things you said earlier, Sweet Pea. I told her I couldn’t spend all my time cooped up in her bedroom and I said us moving in together was…too soon, like I regret all of it. And then yeah, I moved out.” Toni tried to make it sound as sarcastic as possible. “Oh! And then before all that, she uh…booked a ski trip for us at Mont Blanc but I told her I have a roadtrip planned with the poisons instead. AND on top of that, she walked in on me and Veronica Lodge singing a song with the lyrics ‘ _Call your girlfriend_ _._ _It's time you had the talk_ _._ _Give your reasons_ _,_ _say it's not her fault but you just met somebody new.’”_

“Damn.” Was all Fangs could come up with.

“I know.” Toni sighed. “I fucked up.”

“But where are you staying, though?” Sweet Pea asked, knowing Toni’s past experiences with bouncing foster homes.

“Right now, at the speakeasy…But, after Ronnie promoted me to be her right hand woman, we’re talking about a salary raise. Maybe enough for me to actually get my own place. So yeah, I guess that’s one good news for me…I mean, that’s good.”

“Hell yeah, it is.” The taller serpent exclaimed, patting her back. “We celebrate those kinds of things! Maybe we could do drinks later after class? Just the three of us. No gang talk. No wearing of jackets. You know, just like old times.”

Toni’s heart soared at her friend’s words. She wants nothing more than to do that. She thinks of old times and how happy they were, just the three of them. Maybe it’s what’d satisfy her cravings. She just wants to be her old self again, _free._ But then she remembers she has to take Cheryl to her second session with the counselor after class.

“Guys…I-I can’t. I promised Cheryl I will be there for her second session with the school’s guidance counselor. Plus, won’t Jughead get mad?”

“Cheryl Blossom has an appointment with the--?!”

The brunette put her hand on Fangs’ mouth before he could even finish it. “SHH! Nobody knows okay? And you can’t tell anyone. She had to experience a severe panic attack before I had the chance to convince her to get help.”

“What?”

“Sweet Pea, I swear to God. You cannot tell anyone, okay? I shouldn’t even have told you guys…Veronica had to threaten the Vixens to secrecy.”

“Oh come on, it’s just us.” The taller serpent answered.

“I promised her I’ll be there for her.”

“I don’t know, Tiny.” She tries not to wince at the nickname. “I think Red’s supported well enough. She has Andrews. And I thought you guys broke up?”

If Toni had a dollar for every time she has to say this, she’s sure she’ll have enough to buy the speakeasy from Veronica. Okay, that was a bit of an exaggeration.  “I just…Things are still complicated between us. I really love her. We’re not broken up. I just moved out from her place. I…I _don’t belong there, Pea._ And…” Toni hesitates, she doesn’t know if she should bring this up to the guys but, they’re _her guys_. “She basically held that over my head when I called her out for all the fights between the Serpents and the Poisons.”

She sees Sweet Pea clench his jaw at that. For the first time in a long time, she sees this protective side of him and it feels…nice. You know, _feeling like someone wants to protect her._ For once, she’s the one being protected. Even though she knows she can protect herself well enough. It still feels _nice._

And it wasn’t like Toni liked that. No, it was something that she _had_ to do. It was either she learns how to protect herself or _she dies._ Toni Topaz didn’t have it easy growing up either.

The taller serpent didn’t say much. “You did the right thing, Tiny…”

But still, that doesn’t give her the excuse to do all the fuck ups that she’s done.  

“You should go with us later, Tiny.” Fangs added.

“Fangs is right. And Red will be fine on her own. You guys are on a break. And come to think of it, she’s the reason why you got kicked out of the Serpents, your family…” Sweet Pea trailed off. “Although, we’re sorry we didn’t say anything. We just thought… _I just thought_ that you’re with Cheryl no matter what. I couldn’t have convinced you to stay.”

Okay, Toni doesn’t like where this is all headed. She didn’t tell them because she wanted them to be mad at Cheryl. She wants to defend Cheryl. She wants to. So fucking badly…but then—

“You’ve been putting other people before you for a long time now. _When are you going to put yourself first, Toni_?”

Her heart clenched at that. She wanted to cry. She wanted Sweet Pea and Fangs, her unbiological brothers to hold her and cry on their shoulders. Because yes, badass Toni Topaz needs to be taken care of too. She hurts too.

But the bell rang before she could even say something. She smiles at them softly instead, before nodding.

“Hell yeah! Welcome back, Toni!”

 

X

Cheryl Blossom taps her five inch Louboutin’s onto the floor slowly as she sat on the bench beside the guidance office.

 

**Me [3:39pm] : where are you, toni?**

**Me [3:51pm] : i’m sitting by the bench outside Ms. Burke’s office.**

**Me [4:03pm] : toni?**

**Me [4:25pm] : are you coming?**

The redhead locks her phone, wiping the drops of tears on the screen.

She’s really starting to hate promises. Those that aren’t kept.

She stands up and walks away.

“Cheryl.” Leah Burke calls.  

But Cheryl just walks.

X

That evening, Cheryl punched the bag of sand a little harder. She sparred with Archie a little longer. Her workout reps increased in number. She just pushed and pushed and pushed herself until Archie Andrews had to pick her up on his shoulders just to draw her away from the sandbag.

She cries the moment her feet fell to the ground, falling on Archie’s arms.

“She said…” Cheryl sobbed. “She said she was gonna be there…she was gonna be there for me.”

The redheaded boy rubbed her back. “Shh...calm down, Cher.”

“She lied...she lied to me agai—“ Cheryl panted, trying desperately to catch her breath. She was having a complete meltdown in front of Archie again, but she doesn’t care. The ache in her heart wouldn’t stop. All she wants is for it to just _stop_.

Cheryl’s just...she can’t handle another loss again. Not after Jason. Not after what happened to her Dad. Not after her mother tried to ship her off to The Sisters. _She can’t handle another loss._ Her heart won’t be able to take it. She’s gonna be broken _beyond repair._

Archie just keeps on rubbing her back, whispering words to soothe her like “It’s okay” or “I’m here”.

“I—I want her, Arch. Please, I want her.” She pleads and begs, but Toni wouldn’t come to her.

At that Archie hugs her tighter. It’s breaking his heart to see her like this. She picks up Cheryl again and lets her cuddle into his arms. Slowly, he walks them over t the worn out couch that sat against the wall.

“I—I don’t know what to do, Archie. Please…” Cheryl pulled away slightly, looking into the boy’s eyes. And boy, did the redheaded boy’s heart break at every sob.

He held Cheryl’s hand, removing the boxing gloves from her first. He winced at her bloody knuckles. He then reached for a cloth gauze and wrapped them around Cheryl’s fist.

“First, I’m going to hold you like this…” He muttered, letting Chery’s head fall on his shoulders. “And then, you’re going to cry for as long as you like.” He then tucked the redhead’s hair away from her face while gently stroking it. “And then, you’re going to let go.”

“I love her…”

“I know you do. That’s why you have to let go.”

 

X

 

Toni glances at her phone for the fucking seventieth time already tonight. She feels extra guilty for not responding to Cheryl’s texts. But it’s not like she didn’t try. It’s just that she doesn’t...what does she day? And every time she actually unlocks her phone and tries to type something Sweet Pea and slash or Fangs would try to take it away from her.

But fuck, her guilt is eating at her.

“Step away from the phone!” Fangs exclaimed dramatically and Toni flipped him off dramatically.

They were at the speakeasy. It has been a good four hours now and it’s just really starting to bore her. Sweet Pea and Fangs had been hitting on the members of her gang, which _fuck them._ She didn’t ditch Cheryl for this.

Oh but she did.

Toni downs a shot at that. If she’s going to be an asshole to her girlfriend and putting herself first, then she’s not about to do that sober.

But fuck, does she miss Cheryl.

She misses her so much, she just feels miserable.

So she downs another shot.

And Toni glances to the empty glasses on the table. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven...fuck twelve?! She hasn’t gone more than ten before and now twelve? The room started spinning, literally. She sees Veronica shaking her head behind the bar. But she couldn’t care less.

_She wants her Cheryl._

And then someone is taking her by the hand...to the dancefloor. She narrows her eyes as if it’s gonna help focus her vision. It’s...Peaches. And she’s screaming too. Looks like nobody’s sober here so, she started screaming too. The beat of the music loud in her ears and then suddenly she’s dancing her heart out.

Sweat is dripping off her body, her head is spinning and there are bodies...bodies everywhere.

She wants nothing more than to be _free_. This is it. Life on her own. She can stay late for as long as she likes, she can party with strangers…

But in that moment of complete and utter desperation to feel something, her heart beating in her chest, her breath loud in her ears, she feels nothing but _emptiness_.

_Emptiness._

She closes her eyes and she sees Cheryl. Cheryl laughing trying to cover her face as she attempts to take another photo of the redhead.

And her eyes started to tear up. But she just kept on dancing, trying but failing to numb the pain.

But it isn’t enough.

Toni feels a body come in front of her, and hold her. Her eyes were too blurry of tears and drunkenness to see. But as she ran her hand over she feels short, curly hair. And then broad shoulders. Her hands got bold and explored more, cupping his face. His own hands exploring her body either as their bodies move to the beat of the song. His arms are now wrapped around her small waist. Her own arms snaking their way around her neck.

And then suddenly...it feels like a tidal wave. His lips were on hers. Toni’s eyes were closed as he pulls her closer. She thinks of nothing but Cheryl. Cheryl’s eyes, her cheeks, her soft, plump lips...so she gave the kiss her all. She was kissing back with impossible passion. But these lips on hers were nothing but soft. His jaw felt a little rough around her palms. And his hair... _oh no. Oh God. Fuck. FUCK FUCK FUCK!_

Toni tries to pull back with all the strength that she can muster. It took a second before her eyes could focus but then she sees it. Blonde curls, blue eyes, dimples…

“T-Tom?”

The boy smiled at him. He grabbed Toni by the waist once more to land his lips on her but Toni pushed him away.

“What the fuck?!”

Sweet Pea and Fangs have noticed the commotion by now and stopped dancing.

 _Fuck. Fuck, how could she let this happen?_ Tom started grabbing her arm again but her knees wobbled. “Hey, Toni.” He said, cupping the brunette’s face ready to kiss her again when * _slap*._

If Toni was in the right might right now, he’d give him a solid punch right in his fucking nose. She pushed him away again and then turned around, determined to get herself out of there when on the corner of her eye she sees someone, another guy. With a phone in his hand. _Recording._

_FUCK. FUCK. CHERYL— NO._

She felt another strong arms wrap around her. She was ready to punch again when she saw it was Sweet Pea supporting her weight.

Everything was blurry.

The music had stopped. And she was in Sweet Pea’s arms. She tries to make out what’s happening. Fangs looks like he’s holding the blonde boy by his collar, yelling...yelling something.

Sweet Pea was equally as mad. She can feel vibration from when he yells.

What’s confusing her is _why aren’t they beating him up already?_

She tries to watch the confrontation in front of her, although she’s in and out of it. But she tries to focus on Fangs. He’s grabbing him by his jacket, leather jacket. The boy started yelling back at him, and they yell for a while. Until Tom release Fangs’ grip on him and turn around.

A snake…serpent. Serpent.

That was the last thing Toni saw before it went completely black and she’s passed out in Sweet Pea’s arms.

 

X

 

Archie Andrews looked at the clock on the opposite side of the gym. The red numbers read 20:09.

The doors of the gym open lightly startling him, revealing a very giddy Josie with a paperbag full of Pop’s burgers with her. He glances over the sleeping redhead in his arms, sighing. _She doesn’t deserve this_.

He hears his girlfriend chuckle and then the sound of a camera clicking. “I’m captioning that, “when your bf and bff gets along more than you’d expect they would””

Archie gave Josie a small smile. The dark skinned girl got closer and her eyes widen at the sight of her best friend’s knuckles. “Oh my god. What happened?”

“Beat the sandbag till she couldn’t take it anymore.” Archie said, tucking another strand of hair away from the redhead’s face. “It was...heartbreaking. Seeing her like that. You should’ve seen it. She just couldn’t stop begging for her.”

Josie took a deep sigh. “They’re gonna work it out.” She says softly.

And Cheryl’s phone dinged on her pocket. Josie took it out with the intention to put it on silent mode when she saw what the notification was.

It was an email.

**Marked Man**

**watch!!**

**_Attachment:_ ** **TONI TOPAZ_speakeasy.mp4**

“Or not.”  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> don’t come for me love u all bye
> 
>  
> 
> leave comments ok bye


	5. secret keeping, stop the bleeding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the aftermath of the incident. almost 5k of angst, and some fluff idk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok first of all, can yall sit yall asses down? this is fanfiction omg.  
> also, if you can't handle the angst, then don't read angst.  
> also, i love the new episode esp when toni wanted to have a threesome with sp and pnc and she just stopped when she thought of cheryl. umm, sound familiar? It just shows that characters aren’t perfect and they’re allowed to show weakness or be weak. That doesn’t mean they’re bad.  
> final also, toni only cheated like 20% and we're gonna explain that in this chapter.

Toni woke up the next morning panicked because she’d dreamed of being in bed with Cheryl and Tom, all three of them, together. She bolted up, nearly falling off the six feet couch pressed against the window of Veronica Lodge’s bedroom. She felt Betty’s hands on her shoulders.  

“Hi, you okay?”

Her heart raced, and then suddenly it hits her. The pounding in her head, the after taste of the twelve tequila shots that she’s downed and…and _Tom._

Toni grabs her head as her eyes start to water, leaning her body to her knees. _No._ There’s no word quite fitting for it, the feeling she feels right now. She only thinks of this stupid Christian term her grandpa told her when she was three, _eternal damnation._ Hell, she feels like hell.

“Oh I’ll just get V.” She hears Betty’s soft voice behind her before the door opened and closed. And now it’s just silence for her.

Toni gives it to herself.

Growing up mostly alone and unwanted, Toni taught herself a lesson she’s still living by now. And it’s crying? It gets you nothing. It just makes your eyes hurt and your face red. But it gets you nothing and nowhere. It didn’t bring her parents back, it didn’t give her meals and a roof over her head, and it certainly didn’t give her a family. To Toni, crying means hopelessness. So she doesn’t cry, not after all that happened.

She learned how to get up, brush the scratches on her knees and say _it doesn’t hurt that much_ whenever she falls. And as the scratches grow into cuts and bruises from gang wars, so did her determination to keep her little oath that no matter what she’s not gonna cry and give the universe the satisfaction of bringing to tears, a state of nothing but absolute hopelessness. 

But now…now is different. It feels like she’s reliving it all again. She’s homeless, and…and if she hasn’t lost Cheryl, the one person she considers as family before, she’s certainly lost her now. And it’s twice the pain, twice the suffering. And all for what? A group of people to lead? _Personal space?_

She’s alone and she feels like shit and so she gives it to herself. Just this one time, she gives herself the option to cry, and sob and wail because…because everything is falling apart for her. _Just this one time, Toni. You are a one big fuck up, that’s what you are._

She tries to rationalize the situation to stop the tears falling from spaces between her fingers. She can just say she’s drunk and she pushed him away. He’s the one to kiss her after all. She tries to put the blame on other people, on Tom for taking advantage of her while she’s drunk. And she really was drunk, _wasted_ even. She then points a finger to Sweet Pea and Fangs. If they hadn’t convinced her to drink and go out that night to bail on Cheryl’s appointment with the guidance counselor, it wouldn’t have happened.

She wants to be angry at them. All of them.

But who was she kidding, it was all her fault. She chose to go out that night with Sweet Pea and Fangs. She chose to find an alternative solution to the emptiness and loneliness that she feels. She _just wanted to find herself again._ But she’s been making wrong decisions after wrong decisions and there’s really nothing or no one to blame but herself. She was reckless and selfish. Who knows what would’ve happened if she hadn’t fought to keep her consciousness above her?

And that’s why this once, she gives it to herself. Because it hurts. _It hurts that much._

It’s gonna destroy Cheryl. And it’s gonna destroy Toni to be the reason behind that.

 _I love you, please. I love you, please. Please._ Toni chants in her head, as if it was a spell that can take everything that happened last night back.

“T?”

Toni looked up to Veronica, eyes red and puffy.

For a moment there, she sees panic in her eyes. And Toni understands that. If she were in Ronnie’s position, she won’t know what to say or do either. But the Latina sat on the couch with her, her uncertainty evident in the amount of space sitting between them. She runs her hand to Toni’s hair instead.

“I’m so sorry Toni.”

Toni nods at that, and tries to compose herself.

“Me too.”

“What do you remember from…last night, T?” Veronica asked.

Toni swallowed. “I…was dancing…with Peaches. And then, and then somebody else…”

“Tom?” Toni growls, feeling her blood boil at the sound of his name. “Hey…”

“I-It’s not…I didn’t mean to, Ronnie.” Her voice cracked. And she hates it. One thing she hates more than crying is crying in front of other people. “I just—I wanted to feel something. I wanted to try and ease the guilt for bailing on my girlfriend when she needed me by making the most out of my decision but—but I only made it worse. I was just dancing and then suddenly, he…I didn’t really didn’t mean to, Ronnie. I was thinking of her, of Cheryl.  And now I fucked it all up.” Toni sobbed. “I pushed him away, you have to believe me.”

“I know…I know, Toni.” She tries to reassure her, rubbing her hand on her back.

It was silent for a while, neither girls knowing what to say next, until Toni had to ask. “H-How did I get here?”

Veronica gave her a weak smile. “Sweet Pea and Fangs.” She answered. “And then Betty and I changed you. Your clothes are in the dryer.”

Toni nods. “Thank you. A-And I’m sorry for the inconvenience.”

“What are you talking about? It’s totally cool. You can stay for as long as you like.” Veronica said. “Well, it’s a school day so…If you’re not feeling up for it. I understand. But Toni…”

The brunette looks at her friend and sees what looks like hesitation and pity in her eyes.

“Um, I’ve been talking to Sweet Pea and Fangs this morning and uh they told me Tom…he is a serpent. Well, was. After Jughead found out about the ploy, he didn’t hesitate kicking him out of the gang.”

“Ploy? What ploy?”

Ronnie cleared her throat. “You know how the serpents recruited a bunch of Ghoulies after their numbers went down? Turns out, he was one of them…a Ghoulie turned Serpent who wanted to get back at you for some beatdown that happened months ago.”

“What?” So that explains it. It makes sense now…how familiar he looked, the creepy stalker vibe, him calling her Tiny. Maybe he heard it from Sweet Pea and Fangs.

“And uh…Toni? Archie and Josie want to see you. At Pop’s, before school.”

“Why?”

Veronica just gave her an empathetic smile.

 

* * *

 

Toni tries not to squirm in her seat. She’s wearing the clothes from last night and she’s still feeling a little hungover. Okay, a LOT hungover. She just wants to chop her own head off and the glares that Josie Mccoy is giving her is not helping. Not that she doesn’t deserve it.

“We appreciate you coming today, Toni.” Archie says. His face is vacant of the smile he usually wears and to be honest, it’s making Toni scared. Like, shit her pants scared. The redheaded boy can be really scary.

Toni wanted to ask why, but for some reason she thinks they know about what happened, so she just nods. But how? How could they possibly know? The anticipation is killing Toni. She just wants Archie Andrews to throw her and beat her to death to get it over with. She knows she deserves it. But she waited patiently.

But Archie didn’t say anything. Instead, he fished for his phone in his front pocket. He unlocked it, typed something and then licked his lips before he gave it to Toni.

She furrowed her eyebrows, confused as to what Archie wants to convey. But she also reaches for the phone after the redheaded boy gave him an encouraging nod.

“It was sent to Cheryl last night, while we were at the gym.”

Toni’s attention went to the phone, and her confusion vanished as she realized what was happening…on the screen was…was something that made her want to throw up. It was _her_ from last night. She was just dancing, alone at first…and then, and then there he was. They were both swaying to the music. Toni felt disgusted at herself, at the way he looked at her from the bottom up. Tears started to pool from her eyes again, wiping them up harshly to stop herself. She feels _dirty._

Shame, guilt, anger and utter frustration filled Toni’s gut as she watches her drunk self, her limp body drape around him. It was nothing short of an out of body experience. Like she’s watching someone who doesn’t deserve to be in Cheryl Blossom’s life. Hell, that was someone who doesn’t deserve even one look from Cheryl Blossom.

The way she just received his touches, his kisses made Toni feel… _slutty._ The kind that people shun away never to be seen again. The kind that people used to stone. _God, put it away. Make it stop._

She locks Archie’s phone and gives it back to him before she could do something to it that she’ll regret. She looks at both of them. Archie seems laid back, like he’s doing good holding it all together. But Josie, Josie was fuming. Toni watched as she shakes her head in disappointment.

“I can’t do this, Archie.” She tells the boy.

“Josie.” He tried calming her with a hand on her thigh.

“No, I’m sorry. I can’t. I tried. But I really can’t.” She tells Archie. “Did you know how devastated she was when you decided to just drop her yesterday?” She turns her attention to Toni suddenly.

The brunette just looked down.

“You can’t convince her to try and get therapy sessions and just drop her like that,” She adds. “And…what you did—“

“Was unforgivable.” Toni’s voice was weak. “I was drunk and that doesn’t make it okay, I know that. I pushed him away…” She tries. “The video didn’t show it but I pushed him away. “ And she wants to tell them the whole story about the ploy too, but she guesses it doesn’t matter. It’s not gonna matter.

Josie didn’t talk more, and she looks down like she’s thinking about it. “I’ll just wait for you outside, Archie.”

The boy nodded and truthfully, Toni understands. She thinks she deserved more than the look of disappointment Josie gave her but she’s gonna take it.

“D-Does she…Does Cheryl know? H-How is she?” She just really, really had to ask. Because maybe…maybe she can still fix this?

Archie took a deep breath before shaking his head slowly. “She was passed out after…well, she was asleep when the email came in. Josie was smart enough to figure out her passcode.” _It was Toni’s birthday._ “Airdropped it to my phone before deleting the email and blocking the user who sent it. This is the only copy, as of now.”

 _Why?_ Toni said, but only in her head.

“I figured you can be woman enough to tell her yourself.”

To say Toni was relieved was an understatement. _Archie Andrews, you literal angel._

“And it didn’t feel right, her finding out that way. I thought it’s going to hurt her even more. You have got to be the one to tell her, Toni. That girl did nothing but worship the ground that you walk on. She loves you so much. Her ways of showing that might just seem unconventional but she loves you.”

Toni’s heart clenched at that, because she knows that. She should know that. And she should remember that. “Thank you.”

“I didn’t do it for you.”

 

* * *

 

 

Cheryl has been stuck inside Miss Burke’s office for half an hour now, and earnestly she’s been having an amazing time. Going into it to today, she was worried Miss Burke will lecture her for missing her appointment yesterday. That’s why she second guessed coming in but Josie was persistent that she should try again. Turns out, she was worried for nothing because when she saw Miss Burke today, she’s been nothing but understanding and warm.

Sometimes, Cheryl thinks Miss Burke is _too_ warm.

Like it’s so impossible for a person to be this gentle and composed, especially in a town like Riverdale.

She’s learned that her first name is Leah and that she just got her master’s degree in guidance and counseling this year and Riverdale High was her first. She was from a small town in Arizona. That’s all Cheryl knows.

It was hard talking to other people about herself at first. She wasn’t a talker, really. See, she was raised in a home where you consider the words that come out of your mouth very carefully or there’ll be some serious consequences. But once Leah started talking to her like an actual friend, not a counselor, the reservations were gone. It helps that she’s close to her age as well.

She told her about Jason and her family, about Toni, about the Serpents and the Pretty Poisons, pretty random things really. It’s just like having someone that she can talk to about her day. And unlike their first meeting, today was more laid back.

And Cheryl Blossom would’ve rolled her eyes in absolute disbelief at the thought of therapy and counseling a week ago.

“And what about boxing with Archie?” The counselor prompted.

The redhead looked down, turning in her palms so as to hide her swollen knuckles. It wasn’t as bad as last night after Archie told her to ice it but it still wouldn’t pass as normal. Leah looks at her, giving her a reassuring smile.

“Hey, it’s okay.”

“Archie’s been a big help. Especially with happened with Toni. He and Josie have been looking out for me…which, felt strange…at first. After JJ died, it really was just Toni. And Toni she’s…” She hesitates. “..she has things on her own.”

“And how do you feel about that?”

“Scared. That one day, I’m going to wake up and she’s just gone, or she doesn’t love me anymore. That’s why her moving out terrified me. It still does. I feel…like if I’m not there with her from dawn to dusk, she’s going to find someone better. It’s like I’m just waiting for her to say it, that she’s done with me.”

“Do you think she can really do that? Be done with you?”

Cheryl tries to think for a second. “I don’t…I don’t know.”

“Do you still talk to her?”

“Not since yesterday. She hasn’t texted me back either. Maybe she’s just busy with the speakeasy…”

Miss Burke nods at her before giving her a sympathetic smile. “And Toni being busy is…do you feel good about that?”

She’s not gonna lie Toni’s job at the speakeasy was something that she didn’t think her girlfriend still needed. They’ve been living together for a while now and Toni never showed signs of being uncomfortable about their situation. And it Cheryl never bothered to ask her if she is. But that’s just because she’s also comfortable sharing everything with the brunette. But apparently, Toni wasn’t.

“Maybe you should focus on that boxing gym with Archie, or your archery. You’ve mentioned how much you enjoy that. While Toni has her job, you can be busy yourself.”

Her world revolved around Toni Topaz and her girlfriend was the first one smart enough to call that out. And then Miss Burke.

“It’s never easy shifting attentions especially if you were so used to doing that and being that for so long and turning all those negative emotions into something productive, not destructive, but I know you can do it. You’re already on a great start.”

They talk for another half an hour more until Miss Burke’s alarm went off. They end their session with Cheryl saying one thing she learned today and one thing she’s grateful for.

“I learned that…” The anxiety that she feels for talking so vulnerable like that never fails to get to her. But then she reminds herself that it’s okay and talking is good. It’s not something to run away from or get scared of, it’s something that can be so constructive when done right, and when she’s not ahead with her emotions. “…talking can be enjoyable. And I’m grateful that I’m here.”

That was it plain and simple. She gives Miss Burke a smile before picking up her backpack.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?” The young counselor said, opening the door for Cheryl. “I heard there’s  a storm coming tonight so you better charge all those batteries.”

The redhead beamed at her, nodding. “Thank you, Miss Burke.”

“Call me Leah.”

Cheryl’s smile faded a little, surprised at the counselor’s words. “Are you sure? Won’t that be inappropriate?”

“Don’t be silly, Cheryl. I’m only what, like five years older than you?”

The redhead chuckles, tucking a piece of her hair behind her ear. “Okay, Leah.”

“See you tomorrow. Same time.”

Cheryl gave her one last wave before hugging her books to her chest and walking away.

 

* * *

 

 

That night, she’d texted Archie saying she’s gonna sit it out tonight and let the swelling on her fists die down completely but she’ll definitely be back tomorrow. Plus, she’s always with Archie and Josie and she feels as if their time together as a couple keeps on getting compromised because of her. She basically told them _to go see a movie, go get dinner, make love, I don’t know. Take my best friend out, Archie. She deserves it._

And surprisingly, she’s okay with that. She’s okay with staying home tonight. After her dinner with Nana Rose, she filled the bath tub with warm water, used her favorite bath bomb and put on some soft music playing in the background. She can’t even remember the last time she did this on her own.

The last time she did this, she had Toni sitting in between her legs.

She had to shake the inappropriate thoughts in her head before they could even betray her. _It’s okay, she’s okay._ Cheryl contemplates on texting her, ask her why she wasn’t at school today but decided against it. She’s trying to give Toni her space. The brunette’s gonna text her when she wants to.

The bubbles are starting to die down as she casually plays with them when she hears her phone ding. She reached for it immediately, hoping it was Toni but it wasn’t. Still, her heart smiles.

**Josie Mccoy [7:33pm] : sent a photo**

It was a photo of her and Archie at the Bijou, with her bottom lip jutted out and Archie kissing her right cheek.

**Josie Mccoy [7:33pm] : missing my girl :(**

**Me [7:34pm]: well, it’s not my fault you chose the wrong redhead, Josephine.**

Cheryl giggles at her reply, adding the rolling eyes emoji before hitting send. She hears the pitter patter of rain drops over the ceiling and hums to herself. She’s always loved the sound of the rain.

 

* * *

 

 

It was nearing 8pm when she decided to get out of the bath and slip into her comfiest night gown. She sees Toni’s flannel, putting it on immediately. It was still super early and she’s not exactly tired so she looks around to try and look for things to do.

“Hmm…” _Bingo._ She sees her sketch pad sitting on top of the bedside table. The hopeful redhead lies down on her stomach, as she happily opens the stationary and skims through her drawings. Some of them were Toni and some were herself. She hastily looked out the window trying to find inspiration when she saw a distinct light near the gates of Thistlehouse.

She thought it was nothing at first, a traveler who got lost and found the lonely mansion by accident. But it doesn’t move. And she’s been looking at it for the past ten minutes. It was raining like crazy. Someone couldn’t have been there.

The redhead quickly goes to her brother’s old room to find the pair of binoculars Jason used to have for birdhunting with their father, and then rushes back to her room. Carefully, she gave it a peak.

_Toni?_

Cheryl moved her legs as fast as it could, picking up an umbrella in the storage closet before almost diving to the front door. She tugged the flannel close to her body as the cold air hits her, remembering she’s wearing nothing but a nightgown and her girlfriend’s purple flannel.

And as she got closer she could see Toni sitting in her motorcycle, trembling and soaked. And she swears she felt her heart skip a single beat. She’s never seen her like this before, she’s…crying? _Is she crying?_

“Toni!” She yells. “Toni!”

“Cheryl?”

“Toni, what are you doing here?” The redhead tries to overpower the sound of the storm, and it’s like the umbrella is useless because of the heavy downpour.  She extends the umbrella anyways, pulling their bodies closer to each other. And Cheryl could see Toni’s eyes clearly by now, _she’s been crying._ She places her free hand over to the brunette’s face. Her lips were a little blue and trembling because of the cold, And Cheryl does the best she can not to kiss it, “What’s wrong?”

“Cheryl, I’m sorry…I’m so sorry.”

“TT, it’s…we really don’t have to discuss this here. It’s pouring hard. Let’s talk inside.” Cheryl reaches Toni’s arm, gently tugging her to the direction of the house but Toni pulled her back, closer…much closer than they’d been earlier.

“Babe, I’m sorry.” The brunette sobbed even more.

“Oh Toni, how long have you been out here? Have you lost your mind? You’re going to get sick.”

“Listen to me, listen to me.”

“I’m listening, TT. I’m here.” It has been the second time in a week that they’ve done this, in this exact same location

“I’m so sorry, okay?” Toni holds her close, both the brunette’s arm wrapped around her waist and her head tucked underneath her chin. “I didn’t mean to…” And the small brunette continued to mumble a bunch of words against her neck that she couldn’t exactly comprehend but

“TT, I couldn’t really understand.” The redhead wiped her face free of water. She’s equally soaked as Toni now. “Let’s go inside, please.”

And Toni couldn’t protest anymore at that. Part of it’s because her body’s weak and trembling for staying in the rain for so long. Talking to Cheryl wasn’t exactly the sole purpose of her coming here. She wanted to come because she wanted to see it for herself. Like a test, she wanted to find out if she could do it.

She wanted to find out if she could live with it, love Cheryl from a far. Because that’s what’s going to happen, isn’t it? She’s going to lose her…tonight.

And standing there for the past two hours, only looking at the light of Cheryl’s window has led her to the conclusion that _she couldn’t._ She couldn’t and it would kill her. But that’s not really up to her.

Cheryl rushed to the cupboards immediately fetching two warm towels. She wrapped herself around one and wrapped a very distraught Toni in another. A tiny Toni Topaz trembled in her arms, as she tries her best to produce friction and heat from rubbing the brunette’s arms and holding her close to her body.

“Has someone actually punched through your head that hard, you actually decided it was okay to stand in the rain for god knows how long, Toni?” Her voice was stern, but linked with concern. “Antoinette Topaz, you are _so wreckless.”_

Toni’s eyes started to water again at that. Because she is, and selfish and terrible.

“Hey.” Cheryl said softly, her eyes falling to Toni’s trembling lips. And so she cups her face again using both hands. And Toni feels like she’s internally dying from too much love for this woman in front of her, as she feels Cheryl’s slightly warmer lips on her own freezing ones.

And for a moment, she lets herself get lost in the kiss. Her arms gently wrapped around the redhead’s waist, holding her firmly and it was nothing, nothing at all compared to last night. She doesn’t think about how maybe this is the last she gets to hold Cheryl like this, kiss her like this. She just poured her everything into it, with the hope that maybe, maybe it’s enough. It’s enough for Cheryl to still want her.

Toni was the one to pull away. Of course the anxiety of possibly losing the love of her life tonight got to her.

She pushes it down. She tries not to think too much about it as she reaches for her back pocket. Then, she gently reached for Cheryl’s hands, bringing them to her lips as she kissed the redhead’s swollen knuckles before she placed the small flash drive in them.

“Toni, I don’t understand. What’s this?”

The brunette tries to compose herself. She’s never been this vulnerable before. “Inside this drive is something…that’s going to change our relationship, the way that you see me.”

“What are you talking about?”

 _This is it. She’s gonna tell her._ She has to. She’s sensing Cheryl’s anxiety over it and given her past experiences with drives and videos, Toni doesn’t blame her.

“Last night, I was at the speakeasy with the gang and Sweet Pea and Fangs, and uh…I got wasted.” Toni closes her eyes, taking a deep breath. “I got so wasted, babe. And then I was just dancing alone and then…and then somebody came over to me.”

“And?”

“Baby, I’m so sorry.” She held Cheryl’s hands tightly, as tears continued to pour down her face. “I’m so sorry. He kissed me. A-And, I kissed him back.”

She feels Cheryl’s whole demeanor change. She suddenly swats Toni’s arms away and backed up a few inches away from her.

_Fuck, fuck, fuck, this is it._

“Baby—“ Toni tries to get in the redhead’s personal space again.

“Don’t.”

Her voice felt sharp, like it could cut Toni and make her bleed her heart out.

She’s quiet. Cheryl’s quiet, but she Toni knows she’s thinking.

“Cheryl, please I pushed him away—“ The brunette advances again, taking another step which she quickly regretted as a sharp pain landed straight to her right cheek.

“I said don’t.” The redhead said with gritted teeth. “Don’t you _ever_ come near me again!” She pointed a finger to the person she once claimed as the love of her life, and now it’s just nothing. _Nothing._

It was nothing but the sound of Toni’s cries and the rain falling on the roof. And then she sees it, a single tear run down Cheryl Blossom’s pale cheek. And for a moment, she fears the possibility of Cheryl having a panic attack again. But she didn’t.

“Get out.”

“Please, let me explain first, okay? Cheryl,” And at this point Toni couldn’t care less if Cheryl beats her, she tries her best to get a hold of her, hugging the redhead’s waist as Cheryl struggles out of Toni’s hold.

“Let me go.”

“Let me go, Toni.”

“Don’t touch me.”

“I trusted you.”

“I trusted you.”

Toni catches her, as they both fall to the floor and Cheryl stopped resisting anymore, she just let Toni hold her.

“What I did was reckless, okay? And me being drunk doesn’t really excuse what I did. I didn’t think of how it would hurt you…again. And I understand if you…If you don’t want me anymore. I’ll leave but Cheryl…” She said, cradling Cheryl’s head as two of them cried. “Cheryl, I’ll die if I let you go again without fighting for you. It’ll kill me, babe. Please listen to me. Let me explain this.”

She felt Cheryl’s small nod.

“This boy, he has been following me for days now…and—and  I found out today from Veronica that he was a former Ghoulie and now a serpent who wants some sort of sick revenge, because of a beatdown that happened years ago. And I guess, he…he found me and thought he can destroy me through this.”

The redhead continued to cry, not knowing exactly what to feel.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, baby. I should’ve been more careful. I should’ve been more attentive, especially when I started getting weird text messages. But he saw an opportunity and took it, and…and—“

“Toni, how could you do this…”

“I’m so sorry.”

“You should…you should leave.” Cheryl’s voice was small and weak.

“Babe…”

But the redhead was standing up before Toni could even protest. She gives Toni a small nod, and then wipes her face. “You should.”

“What’s gonna happen to us now?” The brunette asked, standing up. “Cheryl.”

“I don’t…I don’t know. I don’t know if there should even be an _us_.”

“Babe, please.”

“Get out.”

Toni wants to respect Cheryl’s decision so bad. But she just can’t. If she has to court Cheryl to win her back, she will. She hasn’t tried begging on her knees yet either. So maybe…maybe she’s gonna try that. And her knees were already half bent when suddenly everything went to black, and the sound electricity dying down.

And unconsciously, she reaches for Cheryl again and she feels the redhead reaching for her too. Cheryl Blossom is afraid of the dark. In an instant, her arms wrap around the trembling girl protectively.

_“Please stay.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is gonna be two parts, 'who are you in the dark' will be up maybe tomorrow idk?  
> so yeah, that's that. i found it kind of impossible writing cheryl dialogues because her words are like too deep and honestly i'm not sure i'm doing a pretty good job. i'm just kind of writing whatever comes to my mind.
> 
> lemme know what u think?? give toni a chance or not?
> 
> lmfao imma give toni another chance anyway  
> cuz u know she's not about to lose cheryl because just one drunken kiss that she DIDN'T EVEN INITIATE. altho i'm lowkey living for the mean comments, i seriously get anxiety over them. so if u dont like, just don't read, k??
> 
> college is kicking my ass again, and the choppiness of the words is from my lack of sleep. It's been like four days now and i kind of still have three term papers in line but i'm still going to write this shit because i didn't choose the stan life, it chose me, yknow? 
> 
> anywho, see u next chapter


	6. who are you in the dark?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> second part of the last chapter. it’s basically 2k of choni dialogue. and 1k toni monologue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pls i didnt write this fic with the intention to choose sides or hate on either character i just thought of a storyline and wrote it. 
> 
> This is literally just fiction to help me cope with stress and anxiety. 
> 
> i’m sorry if it’s sucky. Lmao :(

“Toni.”

“Cher.”

Two girls fumbled in the dark as the lightning struck from the distance, illuminating everything inside the room for a split second and then followed by the sound of the roaring thunder. Toni doesn’t need to see it, but she knows Cheryl is quivering from her fear of the dark and of the loud thunder. It was a childhood fear. Toni distinctly remembers Cheryl curling up against her inside their motel room back when they were roadtripping to California. And so she holds her hand tighter.

“Okay, um my phone is not with me right now. I left it at the bike compartment.” Toni says.

“My phone is—is upstairs.” The redhead winced, as the lightning signaled the upcoming thunder. “Toni…” That last thunder was so loud, she almost didn’t hear Cheryl.

“Let me just get it. Stay here and I can—“

“No! Don’t leave.” Cheryl squeezed her hand and tugged her closer. “ _Don’t leave me.”_

“I’m not leaving, Cher. I’m just going upstairs to get your phone for flashlight. And then I could start the fireplace.”

Cheryl was panting, and Toni could literally hear her breaths shake, so she places her hand on the redhead’s face blindly. “Hey. I won’t leave. I promise, okay?” But Cheryl’s grip only tightens around her hands. “Okay, come with me?”

Toni started to walk to the direction of the bedroom she once claimed her own. And even though it was dark, Toni has this house memorized like the back of her hand, thinking of all the times the two of them had to stumble around after getting tipsy and rushing over to their bedroom to have sex. She knows every surface, every step, every turn by heart.

Once they got inside the bedroom, Toni was hit by some kind of nostalgia. It hasn’t even been a week and yet she feels as if she was gone for decades. Everything was the same as before she left. The only difference was that, all of her belongings were gone like she never even was here.

Toni’s thoughts got distracted by Cheryl’s phone light turning on. It illuminated half of her face and _god,_ Cheryl Blossom looked _divine_ , the kind that you put inside a museum never to be touched or harmed by anyone else. Toni thinks it’s unfair how breathtaking she can be, all with her soaked hair and face bare of any make up. Suddenly, she regrets not bringing her camera.

That’s just one of the many things she regrets.

It was strange looking at Cheryl Blossom right then, with an unsettling feeling in her gut that maybe for the first time in such a long time, Toni couldn’t call her _hers._

And so Toni takes her in, tries to take a memory she can use, a memory that does not involve Cheryl hating her.

It was then that the brunette realized Cheryl was wearing her favorite purple flannel, her _soaked_ purple flannel. Slowly, she approaches the redhead as two pairs of chocolate brown eyes meet.

She took the phone from her hands after tucking a piece of wet hair behind her ears. “I’m going to get the fireplace going.” She said glancing down at Cheryl’s body and pulling the collar of the flannel. “You should get changed.”

Toni started turning around when she felt a tug at the hem of her jacket. “Wait. Don’t leave me. I-It’s…dark and—“ Cheryl panicked.

“Okay, I’m here. Come on.” Toni said, leading them to the closet.

Cheryl turned away from Toni as the redhead start to undress in front of her. Toni clears her throat and tries not to look, but who was she kidding? She _had_ to look. “It’s nothing you haven’t seen before.”

Toni clears her throat again, seeing Cheryl take off her underwear and she tries to avert her gaze, restricting herself of any agenda that does not include talking and making things right with her. Well, if she’ll allow her, of course.

“Aren’t you going to get changed as well?”

“I’ll change after, if you still want me to stay.”

The redhead nodded.

* * *

 

Bad things happen and Toni is aware of that. She knows she doesn’t really deserve anything in this world. That much she believes. But Cheryl Blossom is an entirely different thing. When she first saw her at the halls of Riverdale High, she knew she wanted to have her. Maybe how she feels then wasn’t as deep as she feels right now, maybe it was just a simple attraction driven by lust and sex at first. But after Cheryl opened up to her about her family, her struggles with her sexuality and just everything about her that night at Pop’s, she knew she was in. All in.

She fell in love head first. Without reservations, without thinking about it, and without regrets.

The only thing she regrets is betraying the woman’s trust. In everything.

“Nana’s still deep in her slumber.” Cheryl muttered softly, her body falling to the couch sitting in front of the fireplace where Toni is trying to get the woods in. “You found the candles.”

“Yeah, I hope that’s okay. I lit some in _your_ room too.” The brunette replies, chuckling. “I’ve kinda been waiting for an excuse to use them. Nice huh?”

The redhead fell silent, and Toni doesn’t know what to say either so she settled for it while she tried to get the fire going. She can work with quiet for now, at least Cheryl’s not kicking her out.

A few minutes more and the fire started to feel cozy and warm. She tosses the fire iron and excess wood to the side before closing the fence. She turns around slowly, to see Cheryl just looking at her. Her eyes were tear-stained and she has an unreadable expression in her face, but she doesn’t say anything.

“Alright.” The brunette sighs. Her eyes fall to the pieces of clothing stacked sitting beside Cheryl along with a bunch of blankets. Toni sighed feeling some kind of relief, taking a few steps forward, and gesturing towards the clothes.

“Okay?” She says carefully.

“You should get changed.” Cheryl said, standing up. “I’ll be in my bedroom.” She added. “You can see yourself out once the storm dies out.”

Cheryl was moving past her before she her mind could even grasp it.

 

* * *

 

It’s been good two hours after Cheryl resigned to her bedroom and the storm isn’t looking like it’s going to die soon. Toni has been tossing and turning the whole time and she worries Cheryl is doing much worse. With everything that she found out tonight, and all the chaos happening outside, she worries the redhead is scared and feeling alone.

At this point, it’s like she doesn’t care if Cheryl thinks she’s annoying for always being there. She just wants to see her, and be in her presence. Even if she’s asleep. _If_ tonight is their last night together, she doesn’t want to spend it like this.

She found the bedroom door open and so she carefully steps in.

“Are you awake?”

“Yeah.” She hears a small, broken voice from the bump in the bed.

“Will you talk to me please?” She doesn’t care at all if she sounds desperate as she takes a few bold steps towards the bed. The lightning illuminated the room revealing the redhead lying on her back and staring straight at the ceiling. And then the thunder comes in, making Cheryl’s breath hitch.

“I don’t know what to say to you, Toni. Part of me just wants to find right words to hurt you. The same way you hurt me.”

And it’s like the past few years have never existed to Toni because she‘s starting to tear up again. All those years she suppressed feeling like this, feeling so _hurt_ like this felt nothing. “I am hurting Cheryl.”

“You mean because I got drunk and kissed some random man?” The redhead propped herself on the headboard, meeting Toni’s eyes. They’re swollen. “Because I bailed on you to go spend some time with my friends and broke my promise? Oh wait, that was you.”

 _This is really it, isn’t it?_ She’s gonna lose her...forever. And Toni, she will just be another sorrowful chapter in Cheryl Blossom’s life. It’s over, she doesn’t get the happy ending.

The brunette releases another sigh, shaking her head and running a hand through the pink in her hair.

“ _I love you…”_ she whispers.  

“What?”

“Nothing.” Toni turned around, headed towards the door, already convincing herself that it really _is_ over.

“TT.”

The sound of the nickname breaks Toni completely. “Cher, please!” Her legs walked straight to the bed, climbing on top of it and straddling the redhead underneath her. She buries her head at the crook of Cheryl’s neck and just _inhales_ her.

Cheryl’s arms instinctively wrapped around the brunette’s small frame.

“I just—I’m sorry...I’m sorry.” She whispers against the girl’s neck while placing soft kisses on it, until it grew hungrier and hungrier following a direct route to Cheryl’s lips.

“Toni—I can’t do this.” Cheryl knows it now this time that sex is only going to complicate things instead of fixing them. It didn’t fix it before when she was the one to initiate it and it won’t fix it now.

Cheryl tried to pull away but Toni held her closer. It’s like some big role reversal thing that Toni couldn’t have ever pictured happening to them before but it is now.

The redhead holds her for five more seconds before Cheryl was pushing her away by the waist.

“I’m sorry.”

“You need to go, Toni. Please.”

So she lets Cheryl push her away. And Toni’s never felt so _small_ and so fragile, it’s like she’s back there. Back to the time everyone is giving her away, kicking her out. _..little Antoinette Topaz, nobody wants you._

“I understand…” She looks down, tear drop after tear drop running down her face. “...if you don’t love me anymore.” She finishes before she stood up and head to the direction of the door again.

Because it’s possible. She knows it’s possible. Especially after what she did.

“That’s not true…”

That stopped her.

“That’s why it hurts so much. I love you. I still do. I always will.”

The brunette waits.

“I just can’t trust you.”

Toni let’s her body’s full weight lean at the wall beside the door of Cheryl’s bedroom, _their former bedroom._ She tries to think of the right words to say, wiping her face.

“Remember our first fight?” Toni asked. “At the girls’ bathroom after your announcement about Moose? You made a mistake but I know you promised yourself that if you had a second chance you’d do things differently. And you did.” Toni paused. “I know that I hurt you, Cher.”

She sees Cheryl sit on the bed, tucking her knees beneath her chin.

“But I promised myself that if I can get you to listen tonight, I would tell you that...There was never a moment during that...drunken dance and the kiss that I thought about anyone else but you.”

“I...don’t know, Toni.”

“I get it.”

“No you don’t. It’s not even about one drunken kiss, Toni. Granted that it does hurt, yes. But it’s much more than that,” The redhead eplains. “It’s about how easy it was for you to convince me to do something with the promise that you are going to be there and then not show up the next day like... _like it doesn’t mean anything to you_. Like, it’s that much of an inconvenience to you.”

“It wasn’t, Cher. Believe me. I’m really, really happy that you agreed to get help.”

“Toni, I know that I did some _really_ horrible things. Like when I got us kicked out of the gang that you consider your family and all the irrational and impulsive decisions after that. I know...I know that I can be a lot to handle.

“Cher…”

“No Toni, let me finish. I felt like you were disappearing on me day after day and I did some things that I really didn’t think about because it scared me. And I’m sorry that drove you away.”

“No, Cher. I pushed you away. Because I spent half of my life alone, jumping from one friend’s couch to another. And then, I had the serpents...and then I lost that. I just didn’t know how to go from there. It was a huge part of me and I guess I looked for someone to blame, and you were just...there. _All the time.”_

“What did you want me to do?”

“Nothing, babe. I pushed you away and that’s on me.” The brunette said. “I thought it’s what I wanted. I was _so_ eager to stand on my own two feet, to be alone. Like, babe I finally have a job that can pay for a place of _my own_ , I have a bunch of people to lead and I guess I kind of got lost over that.”

Toni thinks it’s good that for once they’re having a proper conversation that’s not fueled by too much emotions. She can actually think about the things the she needs to express without the worry of bursting into tears or getting hurt by and hurting Cheryl.

“When things got so fucked up yesterday, I went into today thinking about how I’m going to lose you now, for real. And I thought maybe...maybe it’s for the best. I’m not even going to lie that went through my mind. Setting each other free would be much easier, and what I did was kind of unforgivable.”

She can tell Cheryl is really thinking about this, absorbing it word per word and so she continues.

“Because contrary to what everyone believes, I _hate_ hurting you...I really do, babe. And so I thought, I could come here tonight, tell you and apologize. I just know that you’re going to _hate_ me, absolutely hate me. And I’m going to be okay with that because at least I couldn’t hurt you any more than I had.”

And then Cheryl was sobbing.

“But the standing there earlier, while I watch you from a distance just...do your thing, it’s like watching someone from a screen. I just knew that I couldn’t do it.”

Toni tries her hardest to be as soft and as gentle as possible with her words, glancing over to the redhead occasionally to see how she’s taking it.

“The first time I saw you, like really got to see you, I remember thinking that I had to have you or I’ll die. You were just so _perfect._ There was something in you that just drew me in. I even had to make up that bullshit excuse about Fangs bailing on me just so I could talk to you.”

It was her eyes’ turn to water now. It just felt _nice_  looking back just how far they’ve come.

“You thought I was perfect?”

“Babe, who wouldn’t? And so I liked you then but I fell in love because I saw that you _weren’t._ Not at all. You had flaws. Many, actually. Sometimes, when you come home from a really long practice with the Vixens and you sleep, you snore.” Toni chuckles. “When you are in your period you are ten times as clingy.”

By now she could tell Cheryl’s already fighting a smile.

“And—“

“Oh kay, I get it already.”

The two share a smile. Toni walked over to the bed, one feet away from Cheryl.

“The point is, I stood there tonight. And I thought I couldn’t be just another admirer, another fan again I _need to be in your life,_ even though you don’t need me in yours.”

“I need you.”

The brunette reached for Cheryl’s hand.

“The pouring stopped.” Cheryl points out.

Toni looks at the window. “It did.” She took a deep breath. “Listen to me. I know I don’t really deserve anything from you. And I know you have every right to break up with me. But...but I don’t want you to. We can start over if you want. I’m...I’m going to fight for you. Let me fight for you, Cher.”

Cheryl nodded at once before she’s pressing her lips to Toni’s.

Toni knows she still has a lot to make up for. And they still have a lot of things to talk about. But as for now, she kisses her girlfriend back. That’s right, Cheryl Blossom is still her girlfriend.

“You are...the love of my life.” The redhead mutters against their lips.

“And you’re my person too, babe.” Toni answered before cupping her cheek giving Cheryl another peck. And another one. And another one. And another one, until they’re both in laughter. “I love you so much. “

“Even though I’m crazy?” The redhead teased.

“Oh baby, I love you even _more_ when you’re crazy.”

Soft giggles echoed in the room along with the sound of the power coming back.

“Woah.” Toni’s head moved around, her eyes filled with amusement. And Cheryl laughs at her girlfriend’s childlike antics.

The she remembers she has something to give back to Toni. Reaching for the drawer beside her bed, she pulled out the small, black flash drive and handed it over to the brunette.

“Babe,” Toni reaches for her hands, giving her a reassuring smile. “As much as I appreciate this. I want you to keep it.”

“But Toni—“

“Keep it until you feel like you can completely trust me again.” Toni adds. “I know you’re trying to be strong about it but it’s okay to be weak. I know I completely destroyed your trust. And babe, I want to earn it again.” So she closes the redhead’s fist around the material. “We’re going to work through it, okay? You can ask me questions and I’m going to try to be as transparent as possible. And not just about the kiss, everything.”

“Okay.”

“I want to be the kind of person that you can count on again.” Toni smiles. “So keep it. And when the time's right, you can give it back and then I’ll know. What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

“It’s...nothing.” Cheryl chuckles. “You really wanna do this?”

“Of course, why?”

“Nothing, it’s just…you’re amazing. And I’m kind of still taking it all in. Like, I’ve never seen you cry before tonight.”

“That’s because I don’t...cry. Like ever. Well, until tonight.”

Cheryl leaned in and Toni met her halfway. “Thank you.” Cheryl whispered against the brunette’s lips.

“For crying?”

“Toni—“

“Yeah, no I was just kidding. I get it.” Toni laughs. “You’re the _only one_ who gets to see that part of me.”

Cheryl pokes her side and moves to straddle the brunette’s lap. Her arms immediately curled around her girlfriend’s neck. “You know, if we’re going to start over, there are things that we can’t do.” She said using her most innocent tone.

Toni furrowed her brows, pausing for a second to think of it. _Oh._

“Babe, I never agreed to th—ow!”

Cheryl laughed poking her side again.

“But really though,” Toni starts, “all of that can wait.”

_I can wait._

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i just wanna thank everyone for the kind comments and the support the yall are giving this fic real quick. I see you all and reading your comments make my heart smile. 
> 
> some of these moments are inspired by my favorite naley moments from oth.


	7. real friends screaming gang gang gang

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> toni’s wooing cheryl. someone gets punched real hard. some fluff in the end idk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yall i just realized lmfao the reason why the storyline is the way it is...
> 
> is because i’m in college and researching about conveyance of forgiveness and dyadic coping among married couples with experience of infidelity for MONTHS now. lmfao 
> 
> not that it matters, college is slowly eating me alive. here’s a build up chapter (if that’s even a thing)
> 
> also, we still dunno what sweet pea’s last name is. or his real name. so disappointing.

“President Blossom, you are  _ absolutely _ glowing.” Veronica greeted. 

Cheryl couldn’t stop the proud smirk forming on her lips if she wanted to. Spending the night curled up against her girlfriend after weeks of fighting and almost breaking up is exactly how she’d want to seal the deal. They didn’t do anything all night except hold each other, and after some lengthy convincing, Toni finally settled on being the small spoon. But not before she had Cheryl swore never to bring it up again,  _ ever.  _

“Hmm…I’m glad you have eyes, Veronica. If what you’re saying is I look good, then when have I never?” The redhead pointed, tossing a piece of hair behind her shoulder as she took the seat across her friend in the students’ lounge. 

The Latina laughed, rolling her eyes. “It’s good to have you back.”

Meeting her eyes, she gave Veronica a genuine smile. “Thank you, Ronnie.” Maybe she feels a little guilty now for snapping at her friend last week. And now that she’s thought things through properly, maybe like Toni, Veronica has things going on for herself too. That’s why she couldn’t always check on her. Plus, she’ll never ever forget the fact that it was Veronica who went with Toni and Kevin to save her from the Sisters when Josie bailed on her. Cheryl internally cringed, all this thinking is turning her soft.

“Well, Kevin and I were just talking about prom...” the brunette trailed off. The enthusiasm in her voice was fairly noticeable. 

Cheryl thinks for a second. With everything that’s been happening, she almost forgot about the upcoming prom. It is her responsibility as the student council president to assign a committee that’s going to take care of the preparations after all. 

“Uh huh,” the redhead said, leaning back and folding her arms. “I should have known the compliment wasn’t free.” 

Veronica squints. “Oh come on, you know we plan the bombest parties in Riverdale High, bombshell.” The brunette then released an exasperated sigh. “Plus, after what happened with Reggie, and...and everything that’s been going on at home, I  _ need  _ the distraction.” 

Cheryl sympathizes over her friend. She of all people should know how awful it is to be a child of a loveless marriage. So she looks at Kevin and Veronica back and forth, narrowing her eyes at them. 

She hummed. “First of all, bombest  _ isn’t  _ a real word. And second...fine, as long as I get to supervise.”

The eager brunette clapped in enthusiasm, almost launching forward to give Cheryl a hug. “Yay!”

“I want you to report everything to me, and nothing, and I mean nothing passes without my approval.”

“Yes, yes. Thank you.”

Right by the entrance was an approaching Toni Topaz along with Betty Cooper, coffee on one hand and the other stuffed inside a pocket. Cheryl couldn’t help but roam her eyes over her girlfriend’s body hungrily. Toni Topaz in a plaid halter top, black skinny jeans and leather jacket is every girl’s dream come true. And it’s like Cheryl couldn’t stop her swooning at the sight of her girlfriend approaching.

“One gingerbread latte,” Toni handed her the drink. The redhead’s heart melted at Toni’s own handwriting, seeing  _ ‘world’s hottest girlfriend’  _ scribbled on it. “And one kiss for my girl.” Toni leaned down, pressing a short but sensual kiss “Morning, babe. You look absolutely stunning.”

The redhead lets out a quiet moan. “Not nearly as stunning as you, TT.” 

Chuckling while rolling her eyes, Toni placed a hand over her girlfriend’s cheek. “Alright, let me just grab my books and I’ll walk you to class.” Toni said before turning around. “Hey, boss, Kevin.” 

“Um, where’s  _ my  _ coffee, T?” Veronica teased. 

“Uh...sorry?” Toni shrugged before making her way out. 

The dramatic look of surprise on Veronica’s face as her jaw dropped encouraged the sly grin on the redhead’s face if it wasn’t already there. “It’s time to admit your defeat, Veronica. You can’t steal my TT away from me.” She said proudly. 

“I’m not planning to, bombshell.” Veronica huffed. “I for one, am glad someone in this room is getting treated like a queen.”

And indeed she was. She did not expect the attention monster inside her to be fed this early in the morning, but...she’ll take it.

 

* * *

Toni cruised the halls of Riverdale High with a goofy smile on her face. After her sleepover at Thistlehouse, she went back to the speakeasy to prepare for school and made a detour to her and Cheryl’s favorite coffee shop to get her girl a cup. Might as well start the wooing today. 

She opened her locker to get her stuff before she felt the presence of Sweet Pea and Fangs hovering behind her. 

“What do you guys want?” Toni deadpanned. 

“Hey, Tiny. We just uh...wanted to check in on you.” She heard Sweet Pea. “How are you?”

The brunette turned around, folding her arms. “Peachy.”

“Right.” He says awkwardly, scratching the back of his head. 

Toni looks to Fangs with raised eyebrows, expecting him to say anything. The boy squirmed under her gaze. 

“We’re sorry about what happened, Tiny. I swear we didn’t know he was planning some scheme against you. Jughead kicked him out—“

Toni rolled her eyes in frustration, dismissing the two to go back to what she was doing. 

“Look, we’re really sorry for everything. We just miss you, okay? We feel awful for what happened.” 

“It’s not just that, Pea.” Toni says. “I don’t know. Part of me wants to get mad at you guys for everything. But I’m just much more angry at myself.”

“Hey, it’s okay. We’re here for you.” The shorter serpent said. “We’re still your boys, okay?”

Sweet Pea cleared his throat. “I’m sorry about what I said about Red, too. I know you love her. How is she? How are you guys?” 

“We’re...okay. I don’t know, getting there. I’m trying to make it up to her. And uh, I’m not the one you should be apologizing to.”

“I know, I know. Kind of planning on seeing her today…”

Toni nods. 

“So, we cool?” Fangs asked. 

“Let us make it up to you, Tiny. We’ll do whatever it takes. Hey, how ‘bout we go out after school? The four of us?” The taller serpent suggested eagerly, planting a playful slap on Toni’s arm. 

Toni thinks for a second. “Actually…”

“What?”

“I might need your help for something.”

* * *

 

 

Admiration was something that isn’t new to Cheryl Blossom. But as she entered the school cafeteria hand in hand with her muse, she felt a brand new kind of pride and superiority wash over her. 

“Where do you wanna sit, babe?” The redhead tugged on her and Toni’s intertwined hands, glancing around the cafeteria with a smile that could easily make Toni’s heart skip a beat. 

She adjusted her bag over her shoulders, looking briefly over the Poisons who were looking back at her with much anticipation. But since she’s wooing, “um, wherever you wanna sit, babe.” 

“Are you sure, TT?” 

The brunette gives Peaches a knowing look and then the gang member nods at once. 

“Yeah. Of course.” She squeezes Cheryl’s hand, bringing it to her lips and placing a kiss over the girls’ knuckles. 

Cheryl tugged on Toni’s arms and it wasn’t long until she realized they were both headed towards Archie and Josie’s table. Suddenly, Toni’s hands felt sweaty as she walked behind her girlfriend. They caught the pair’s attention and Toni felt some sort of relief when she saw Archie Andrews smiling at them. Josie on the other hand, though...

“Hey guys,” the redheaded boy greeted. 

Cheryl got situated on the seat across the couple while Toni stood awkwardly looking at Josie. 

“Oh relax, Topaz. I’m not going rip your head off. Sit down.” She said rolling her eyes. 

“Uh, thanks Josie.” Toni placed her bag beside the seat and got situated herself. 

Archie laughed, snaking an arm around his girlfriend. He rubbed circles around her arm so as to soothe the agitated brunette. “So, you guys worked it out?”

“We...are still working it out.” Cheryl commented, meeting Toni’s eyes. “TT told me everything and I could not express how extremely  thankful I am for the both you.”

“Hey girl, we got you.” Josie answered, tossing a fry into her mouth. 

Cheryl smiled. 

“Uh babe,” Toni called. “I’m just going to go get our lunch.” She pecked the redhead’s cheek and then stood up. “Be right back.” 

The brunette slowly made her way to the counter, passing different tables  and stopping abruptly to the one where her gang sat before high fiving some of them. She beamed proudly at every “nice” remark, her heart soaring with joy. 

The tiny brunette then continued to make her way to the counter, passing over different tables. But there was something that made her stop in her tracks, a little group of men who seem to be whispering and cackling among themselves as she passed by. 

Toni  _ had  _ to turn around. 

Her eyebrows knitted painfully in her forehead and her fist curled up firmly at the sight of a blonde boy sitting at their center.  _ Motherfucker.  _

_ God,  _ Toni wishes she could wipe that shit-eating grin on his face with her fist. He glances at her direction one more time, as if he was taunting her, waiting for her to lose it in front of everyone and truthfully, Toni just might. 

The taunting of the boy continued as he laughs and whispers something among the group of boys that seemed to be brainwashed by his stories. Then suddenly, he’s showing something on his phone to the boy on his left. 

And Toni just  _ had  _ to do something. 

She walks over to their table briskly, her jaw clenched. 

When she’s faced with such threat, her first instinct is  _ punch now, talk later. _ And so she rushes to the table, but the boy stood, meeting her halfway with a smug grin on his face. 

“Woah, woah...Toni.” Tom said, mocking the girl, discreetly disrespecting her personal space as he started closing the distance between them. “I know you miss me. Relax.” 

“One more step and you’ll be nursing a broken nose tonight.” Toni warned, pointing a finger to the smug boy. 

But he just chuckles, not hesitating to close the space between them entirely. “Woah, babe. Don’t act like you don’t remember liking it. Do you need a refresher?” He reached for his phone. “Because I have something—“

His breath sent powerful waves of disgust over Toni, and before she knows it, she’s throwing a fist over the boy’s nose. 

Toni looks at him, her eyes filled with nothing but rage and anger. She doesn’t even notice the entire student body’s eyes on the commotion. And for a moment she fears crying again, from feeling so angry and so sick. But she tries to compose herself. 

The boy laughed, wiping the blood dripping from his nose. “You  _ slut.”  _

Toni couldn’t describe how it felt, it’s like she blacked out. Her legs move involuntarily, her mind focused on one thing.  _ Kill him.  _ Just  _ fucking  _ kill him. 

The next scenes were blurry to Toni. All she knows is she’s being held back by strong arms, and her aggressor...was suddenly on the ground, writhing in pain. 

Next thing she knows, Weatherbee is there along with a bunch of faculty members trying to break up the fight in front of her. 

“Mr. Peabody!” The principal yelled, catching the Serpent’s attention. 

Toni looks around. She sees Fangs behind her, holding her by her waist, with Cheryl and Archie in tow. She sees Jughead on his feet, dumbfounded along with a bunch of serpents. The Poisons are standing too. And then Sweet Pea, hovering over Tom, about to land his third punch before the faculty members held him by the arms. 

He was being dragged to the principal’s office when he whispered to Toni. “I got you, Tiny.” 

 

* * *

 

Toni tapped her foot anxiously outside the principal’s office. She can hear the yelling pretty clearly, and honestly she’s a little pissed at Sweet Pea for taking the fall entirely too. She knows her friend is just a detention away from expulsion and then this happens. God knows she’ll never forgive herself if he got expelled for punching the guy’s light out.  

“TT, try to calm down please.” Cheryl smiled, placing a hand to her bouncing knees. 

“He shouldn’t have stepped in.” Toni gritted her teeth. “I got him.” 

“And what would’ve happened, Toni? As much as I despise what’s happening, I’m relieved it’s not you who’s inside Weatherbee’s office. So sue me if I’m not as upset as you are.”  

“Cheryl, you don’t understand. For all I know he’s inside getting expelled.”

“Tiny, Red is right.” Toni couldn’t believe her ears.  _ That  _ coming from Fangs Fogarty, the boy Sweet Pea’s attached at the hip with. “You need to calm down. I’m sure he’s gonna be okay. Plus, you don’t have the cleanest record either, so please just, calm down and let’s wait for the verdict.” 

A few minutes more and the door to the principal’s office opened, revealing a fuming Sweet Pea. 

The trio were on their feet immediately as the tall serpent slammed the door behind him. 

“...dickheads.” Was all the boy could say as he looked at the small piece of paper that contained his sanction. 

“What’s the damage, Sweets?” Fangs asked. 

“They’re not expelling me, relax.”

Toni let out a relieved sigh. 

“But they’re not expelling the motherfucker either.” 

Toni’s eyes furrowed. “Okay, please tell me all the yelling that we heard earlier wasn’t you trying to convince Weatherbee to expel him.”

“What? He deserves it.”

“Pea, you did not—“

“Thank you, Sweet Pea.” Cheryl interrupted. 

“It’s cool, Red.” He gives the redhead a bright smile. “And uh, I guess I owe you an apology too. I’m really, really sorry. For the teasing and uh, all the things that I said to Toni that made her bail on you. It was such a dickhead move. And I swear it will never happen again.” 

“Truce.” Cheryl said, extending a hand for Sweet Pea to shake. 

The tall serpent looked at her and laughed before shaking the redhead’s hand. 

“Well, there goes our plan on going out tonight. I earned myself four detentions. Plus, a trip to the guidance office.” 

Fangs groaned. “Aw man, that sucks.”

The redhead couldn’t help but roll her eyes at the two serpents’ interaction “Leah’s not so bad. It didn’t sit right with me at first but then, it got better.” Cheryl pouted. “She’s warm.”

“Wait, who’s warm?” Toni asked, her eyebrows furrowed in confusion. 

“Leah.”

“Who?” Sweet Pea repeated. 

The redhead grunted. “The new guidance counselor.” 

_ Ohhh.  _

“ _ That _ guidance counselor?” The three followed Fangs’ stare. 

Making her way out of the counselor’s office is a brunette in a white off shoulder blouse, tight striped pencil skirt, and five inch heels. 

Toni couldn’t believe her eyes. “I didn’t expect her to be so—“ 

“HOT.” The two serpents said in unison, making Toni’s eyes roll.  

“I was gonna say young but, uh okay I guess…” Toni looked at Cheryl at once. She cleared her throat and furrowed her eyebrows, not appreciating how her girlfriend seemed to be gawking at the very young and very...visually stimulating counselor. 

Toni found herself unconsciously draping an arm around  _ her  _ girlfriend’s shoulders.

“Hey, Leah.” The redhead called, catching the counselor’s attention. 

The young counselor twirled and Toni could swear what she saw was something straight out of a Nicholas Sparks movie. And she’s starting to get agitated over Cheryl looking at her and smiling at her and just, acknowledging her presence. Whatever  _ this _ is, Toni doesn’t like it. She doesn’t like it one bit. 

“Cheryl,” The counselor greeted, giving the redhead a dazzling smile. “Who are your  _ friends _ ?” 

_ Friends? Ugh, the fuck not.  _ “Hi, I’m Toni Topaz. Cheryl’s  _ girlfriend.”  _ Toni emphasized. 

“Toni,” She gave Cheryl a knowing look. “I’ve heard a lot of good things.” 

“I’m Sweet Pea.” The taller Serpent smiled sheepishly, extending a hand. 

“And I’m Fangs.” The other Serpent cut in, taking the counselor’s hand from Sweet Pea’s grip. 

There was an awkward silence, which Toni cleared her throat for, standing closer to Cheryl and pulling her by the waist. 

“Well, I was on my way to the teachers’ lounge for a coffee refill…” The counselor trailed off. “I’ll see you guys later? Especially  _ you…”  _ She patted the Cheryl’s shoulder, which made the redhead chuckle. 

Toni was committing mass murder inside her head. 

“And me.” Sweet Pea butts in and the young counselor looks at him, confusion masking her face. “I have a slip.” 

_ God, Toni hates this.  _ She hates it even more that Sweet Pea and Fangs are acting like two lovestruck virgins. 

“Oh, I’ll see you later then,  _ Sweet Pea.”  _ She chuckled. “Bye, guys.” The older brunette turned around and walked away from the group of teenagers. 

“See you later!” The tall serpent smiled sheepishly again, waving bye to the young counselor. “Oh I’ll punch any guy for you anyday, Tiny. If I get to see  _ that  _ fine piece of a—“

“Okay! Enough. She’s good in the eyes, whatever.” Toni snapped. 

“I can’t believe Red is on first name basis with the hot guidance counselor.” Fangs added. 

Cheryl Blossom smirked. She recognizes a jealous Toni Topaz when she sees one. And boy, does it feel good to see Toni squirm in jealousy. 

Toni huffed. “Let’s get to class.” She mutters, yanking a smirking Cheryl by the hand. 

 

* * *

 

Cheryl has just finished another counseling session when she felt her phone vibrate in her pocket. 

**Archie Andrews [ 4:59pm ] : you coming over to the gym tonight, cher?**

**Me [ 5:00pm ] : yes, arch. see you xx**

She pushes the door open, revealing a sad Toni leaning against the wall, hands stuffed inside her jean pockets. She chuckles, giving her a weak smile. 

“Hey,” The redhead greets her girlfriend with a peck at the corner of her mouth. The brunette’s arms instantly wrapped around Cheryl’s waist. “What’s got you looking down-hearted, babe?”

Toni rolled her eyes teasingly. “Don’t act like you don’t know...you’re enjoying this.” 

The redhead laughed. 

“Baaaabe.” Toni whined pulling her girlfriend closer, burying her head at the crook of her neck. 

“Payback’s a bitch, babe.” Cheryl’s giggles vibrated against her neck, which Toni is placing soft kisses on.  “Full disclosure, TT. You have nothing to worry about. Leah’s...she’s—“

“—hot.” Toni answered, pulling her face away from her girlfriend’s neck for a split second. 

“A good looking woman.”

“Just say hot, babe. I get it.” 

“Fine she’s  _ hot. _ ” The redhead agreed. 

Toni grumbles again. “No, take it back. I changed my mind.” 

The redhead laughs again, swaying their bodies. “Really though. I appreciate her good looks, just like the next person but there can never be  _ anything  _ between us.”

“So...you’re not attracted to her?” The brunette asks carefully. 

“No. Were you—were you attracted to him? The guy that Sweet Pea punched?”

Toni squints her eyes, surprised at the change of topic. “I wasn’t. I appreciate that he was good-looking too though. But that’s all. Thinking about that makes me gag now. Ugh.” 

Cheryl pauses for a second. “Okay, I believe you, TT.” She said looking Toni in the eyes. “It’s just weird, I guess.”

“What is?”

“Nothing, really. It’s just that…” She can see the hesitation in the redhead’s eyes so, Toni gives her a smile to make sure she has nothing to worry about.  “...with you I worry about everyone. Boys and girls alike.”

“Hey, listen. You don’t have to worry about anything or  _ anyone.  _ I’m yours, okay?” Toni reaches for the redhead’s hand and places it on her chest. “All yours…” She presses their foreheads together. “I’m sorry that I gave you a reason to doubt that, but I’m not gonna stop until I’ve proven myself again.” 

“And you really don’t have anything to worry about Leah either. She’s just a new friend that’s all.” 

“Look at you making friends.” Toni tucked a piece of red hair away from her Cheryl’s face. 

“It’s a new thing that I’m trying, TT.” The redhead said proudly. 

“I know, I’m so proud of you.” 

The redhead smiles, giving Toni a sweet peck on the lips. 

“Nuh uh, one more.” The brunette demanded, pulling the redhead’s face gently to plant another kiss on her lips when she tried to pull away. “Okay, are we going home tonight, or boxing with Archie?”

“Boxing with Archie.” Cheryl answered, beaming brightly at her girlfriend. “You should come check it out, TT. Maybe I’ll give you a free show.” 

The brunette blushed. Cheryl in full boxing attire is something that makes the knot inside her stomach form.  _ God, she gets turned on just by thinking about it.  _ If she goes now, she won’t be be able to handle “Uh…” Toni cleared her throat. “I’m going apartment hunting with the gang today, babe. Maybe some other time…”

“Hmm...considering I got you at lunch. Okay, fine.” Cheryl roamed her hands on the brunette’s backside, before arriving at their final destination, Toni’s ass. She squeezed the flesh, and then moaned on the flustered brunette’s ear. “Suit yourself…” 

“Cher…”

But the redhead continued on her tease, licking an earlobe and kissing the brunette’s neck. 

“Cher, oh my god.” The brunette lets out when Cheryl bit her jaw a little harshly. Toni wants to pull away, but  _ god, sweet baby jesus. It has been a whole week.  _ With all the strength and willpower that she could muster, the brunette pulled away. 

Cheryl laughs. “Oh relax, Toni. I’m not going to  _ that  _ outside the guidance counselor’s office.  _ Not unless you ask me to…” _ The redhead said in her most seductive tone. 

“Okay, stop. Now you’re just really teasing me.” Toni chuckled. “I meant it when I said sex can wait.” 

“Uh huh. Okay.”

“Okay? Just like that?”

“Yeah, come on.” Cheryl intertwined their fingers. “Before I change my mind.” 

  
  
  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lemme know what u guys think. 
> 
> i still love swangs + toni brotp even tho it’s not canon tbh. it’s something good that the writers decided to sleep on. 
> 
> anyways, according to sum news, we’re finally going to get to see toni’s backstory in the show. i’m excited for that. Hbu guys? 
> 
> also, THE SPOILERS OMG.


	8. darling don’t you know what you are

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> toni makes an important decision. cheryl doesn’t exactly approve.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok wow.  
> this is 5k of fluff. JUST REALLY CHEESY FLUFF THAT’LL MAKE U CRINGE.  
> i’ve already decided that this is gonna be 10 chapters. the next is going to be split in half. So yeah. Enjoy.

Kissing Toni Topaz is something that Cheryl could _never_ get tired of. Not after weeks of constant arguments and pissing each other off. Not after three years into their relationship. Not after they’re married and have two sets of twins. And certainly not after they’re old and grey and surrounded by their grandchildren.

So as the couple stumbles around Toni’s new studio apartment, after the brunette offered to pick her girlfriend up after her boxing sessions with Archie, Cheryl thinks she can never, not for a single second, get tired of kissing one Toni Topaz.

And Toni seems fired up too, which is just right according to plan. Because she _definitely_ planned on texting her brunette girlfriend after sparring with Archie in his gym at Seaside, asking her for a ride home because she **_doesn’t wanna bother Archie and Josie for a detour to drop me off :(_ **

Toni swiped her motorcycle keys from the newly bought key holder and made a twenty minute travel to Seaside a ten minute. The smug redhead had pulled her hair out of the ponytail, adjusted her stringed boxing shorts tighter and put on Toni’s favorite flavored lip gloss. To say that the brunette was flustered the moment she’s stepped foot inside the gym, seeing the look of teasing in her girlfriend’s face was a lie. No, she wasn’t flustered. She was an _incoherent mess_.

It was even made worse by the redhead’s teasing, like her hand moving up and down Toni’s torso as the brunette attempted to have idle talk with Archie and Josie. She could tell her girlfriend was on the verge of cracking. So, she talks a little closer to Toni’s ear, finds different excuses to touch her, and sways her hips a little wilder as Archie gave her a little tour of the place.

Toni’s act looked strong, for the most part. But she keeps on clearing her throat. When the redhead had suggested that she and Archie spar one last round to show Toni her progress, Toni’s jaw felt broken like it could never close again.

It’s no secret the brunette knows how to throw a good punch as well, so as she looked at the way her girlfriend’s arm muscles flex at every punch, she could feel herself losing the war. The knot inside her stomach was there more than ever, all she could do was swallow.

When the round was finished, Toni felt like she was too. The smug redhead took off her gloves and picked up her water bottle, drinking haphazardly from it, as Toni followed the droplets of water run down from the corner of her girlfriend’s mouth to her neck and her collarbone and...and then her cleavage.

It was safe to say the brunette’s face went similar to that of a tomato.

It didn’t help that Cheryl was placing soft kisses on her neck and shoulders on the ride home too. It has been a week since the whole fiasco and sue her if she thinks they’re ready. Toni has been really making it up to her, treating her like the queen that she is. And so she thinks, it’s only fitting that she gives back. So she licked the brunette’s earlobe, whispering _“take me to your place, Antoinette.”_

So yeah, that’s how they ended up nearly bulldozing every box inside Toni’s newly rented studio apartment, as they try and navigate their pressed bodies to the couch still wrapped in plastic.

Cheryl pushes the brunette down and then straddles her immediately, like a predator on the move. “What can you say, TT? I’m good right?”

Toni’s response was nothing but a moan as her redheaded girlfriend licked her bottom lip.

But contrary to what she was doing, Toni is actually _opposed_  to this. But what can you do when you have a panting Cheryl Blossom in your lap, wearing tight boxing shorts and a dangerously low cut tank top? _Nothing._ You’re in her mercy.

So when Cheryl reintroduced her tongue to hers, Toni’s head spun. _God, fuck. Cheryl Blossom really gets everything she wants._

The redhead tugged on her Poison jacket, already making a move on taking it off while she kisses Toni’s exposed shoulders.

While Toni...well,her hands stayed close to Cheryl’s thighs, never daring to move higher. Her mind is still screaming NO in bold, capital letters at her. She’s spent days planning, obsessing even the smallest details. Is she just gonna let that go to waste?

But _god_ is Cheryl Blossom convincing…

A few minutes more of kissing, sucking and biting, the redhead notices Toni’s lack of participation in the undressing part of it all. So she takes the matter into her own hands and moved the brunette’s hands around her back, at the hem of her top.

Cheryl continues moaning sinfully as her body rocked back and forth on Toni’s lap. Then, she releases a grunt at Toni toying the hem of her shirt. “Babe.”

“Hmm?” The brunette answered from her girlfriend’s neck.

“Ugh.” Cheryl rolled her eyes. She’s agitated and not to mention, _very sexually frustrated_ and so she takes matters into her own hands. She pulled away momentarily, pulling her tank top up and tossing it away to be forgotten.

“Babe…” Toni calls, her mouth watering at the sight of Cheryl’s lace white bra. _God, only Cheryl Blossom would wear that underneath sports clothes._ “I don’t thi—“

The redhead stops her with a kiss before she could even finish the sentence. She raises Toni’s hands to the clasp of her bra, panting heavily as she plants open mouthed kisses on the brunette’s jaw.

“Cher.” Toni call out softly. “Baby.”

But the redhead only continued her assault on Toni’s neck, sucking violently and leaving marks.

Toni then reaches for the redhead’s cheek, gently pulling her away from her neck. “Babe.”

“What?!” Cheryl snapped.

Toni winced at the sudden outburst and honestly, she feels like she’s going to burst out laughing at her girlfriend’s adorableness. Because yeah, she finds Cheryl’s hot headedness _extremely adorable._

“We have to stop.” She said, catching her breath.

Cheryl’s eyebrows furrowed in confusion and absolute disbelief, before she was chuckling. “Why?”

“Because...well, um…” Toni tries to think. “I’m really serious about waiting. You know, ‘til the times right.”

The redhead full on laughed before she was reaching for Toni’s jean button and kissing her neck again.

“Baaaabe.” Toni held the redhead’s wrists. “I’m serious.”

“Toni, that’s enough. You’ve already made me laugh. Stop joking already.”

“I’m not joking.” But despite her efforts, Toni couldn’t hide her smile anymore.

Cheryl shook in laughter as she struggled to get her hands away from her girlfriend’s hold. “Toni, what are you doing? This is ridiculous.”

But the brunette grip was firm on her smug girlfriend’s wrists. “Babe, I’m serious.” Toni struggles to keep her shoulders from shaking in laughter.

“Toni, let go.”

“No.”

“Are you kidding me? Let go.”

“No.” Toni answered. “Promise me you won’t try to undress me first.”

“No. Are you fucking kidding m—ow! You’re hurting me!“

The redhead feigned being in pain, which Toni bought because her eyes suddenly widen and her grip loosens around Cheryl’s wrists. “Oh my god, baby I’m so sorry. Did it—mmph.”

Cheryl's lips were on hers again and she feels herself kissing back. Her hands roamed around the exposed skin of her girlfriends back and then suddenly she feels Cheryl smirk against her lips. She feels her jeans getting unbuttoned again and so she reaches for Cheryl’s hands again, putting them behind her back now.

“Toni, what the fuck.” The redhead’s face expression was serious.

“I told you, I’m serious!” Toni reasons out.

“About what??? Don’t you want me?” Cheryl asked in frustration. “Are you not attracted to me anymore?”

The brunette’s eyes widen at her girlfriend’s remark. She didn’t to make Cheryl feel that way, it’s just that...she has plans. And she’s come a long way, it’s a waste to back out now. God knows she wants Cheryl Blossom too...in every way she could think of.

“Baby, no. Oh my god.” Toni answered. “I am! Trust me, I am. I want you.” She removes one hand on Cheryl’s restrained arms and placed it on the redhead’s cheek.

“I want you too. So _why_ are we still talking?!” Cheryl exclaimed.

“Baby. Calm down, okay?” Toni chuckles. “It’s just that I have something planned for us. Like, for _that_.”

“You mean sex?”

Toni widens her eyes. “Yes, sex. I want our next to be...special. Fucking on a second hand couch that hasn’t been cleaned doesn’t exactly scream romantic to me.”

“Okay first all, ew. Babe, this is really gross. I almost let you make love to me on this couch.” The redhead’s face crumpled, making an effort to stand up. But Toni pulled her closer.

“Oh relax. There’s a reason why it’s covered in plastic. What’s second?”

Cheryl pouted, adjusting herself on her girlfriend’s lap. “Oh I don’t know. The dirt and stench of this couch wiped it out of my memory.”

Toni rolled her eyes. “You’re so dramatic sometimes, baby. But I’m serious, though. I really want our next to be special. Like, when you really, really feel like you can trust me again.”

“Oh TT, I know I can trust you again.” Cheryl wrapped her arms around Toni’s neck. She makes a mental note to give Toni the flashdrive back soon. She still hasn’t seen the footage and if she’s being honest, she doesn’t think she needs to.

Toni has been amazing this past week. And she feels like it’s a dream. If it’s a dream, please never ever wake Cheryl up.

The brunette sighed, placing soft kisses on Cheryl’s backhand. “I love you for that, Cher.”

The two shared a look. Cheryl just couldn’t stop smiling at her beau. “Are you absolutely certain you don’t wanna have sex with me right now, TT?”

Toni fought a laugh before taking a deep breath. “I’m sure.” She reached for her girlfriend’s shirt dangling on the arm of the couch and carefully helped her girlfriend into it.

Cheryl smiled brightly at her. The redhead’s heart feels so full she feels like she’s gonna cry, especially at the way Toni’s looking at her right now. “I love you so much, Antoinette.”

“I love you.” She replies in the softest, purest way possible.

The redhead leans in. But this time it’s gentler, like it’s more driven by love instead of lust. Toni meets her halfway, the brunette’s hand snaking its way unto red hair.

They kiss softly for a while. The kiss only involving gentle pecks. Toni pulled away slowly, meeting her girlfriend’s eyes.

“What?” Toni asks.

“It’s just, this doesn’t make any sense. I can’t be _this_ happy. It just—something has to go wrong. I know it. The other shoe will drop and—“

“Shh…” The brunette presses a finger to plump lips. “There is no shoe, Cher. Yes, bad things will happen. But that doesn’t mean you can’t let yourself be happy. You can’t sit around, waiting for it, babe. You just have to let them be. You can be happy. I can be happy. We’re going to be okay. And, you’re forgetting one important thing.”

“What?”

“We’re together. And we’re here for each other.”

By then, Cheryl couldn’t stop the tears from forming in her eyes already. _Is this possible? To love someone so deeply like this?_ Ever since Jason died, Cheryl flushed down the possibility of love for herself down the drain. But Toni...she’s...

“You’ve always been my hero, TT.”

“And you’re my hero too.” The brunette said, wiping her girlfriend’s tears away. “You save me too, Cher. In ways you don’t even know. You make strong. You make me feel loved and _wanted._ You make me feel beautiful. And...you just, make me a better woman. Someone my parents would be proud of if they’re here.”

 _God, only Toni Topaz could make her feel this way._ The redhead leans in again, capturing Toni’s lips with her own. She puts all the love, all the passion that she has to the kiss. Until she feels Toni pulling back.

“Uh babe—“ The brunette clears her throat, leaning her head over to the back rest. “Please—just.”

“Wh-What?”

She pushes Cheryl slightly and the redhead’s jaw gaped at her.

“Can you not—“

“We can’t kiss now?!” Cheryl exclaimed. “Let me kiss youuuu…” She whined.

Toni laughed, carefully giving her girlfriend a short peck.

“Hey! Give me a real kiss!”

“Babe, um just being careful. I—I really don’t trust myself when you’re being like this. Especially after that emotional conversation.”

Cheryl rolled her eyes playfully. “Ugh. Look who’s being dramatic now.”

“Cher, I’m serious.” And Toni was. She didn’t spend almost a week planning everything just so Cheryl could ruin it with a kiss. Toni knows she is _that_ weak.

“Antoinette Topaz, if you don’t give me a proper kiss right fucking now, I will throw a fucking fit. And you’re not gonna like it!”

Toni held the back of Cheryl head and pulled it closer, planting the loudest, most intense kiss on her lips.

“Another one..” The redhead demaded.

“Cher!” The brunette whined. “Can you get off of me please, my legs are dead by now.”

Cheryl feigned offensement, placing her right hand over her chest dramatically. “You wound me, Antoinette.”

The redhead then did something Toni never thought she would. Cheryl held Toni’s cheeks and licked a line up to the brunette’s nose.

“Ew, Cher. What the fuck. Saliva.” Toni wiped the line of saliva on her face with the back of her hand.

She looks at Cheryl, unable to help the smile forming on her lips. It’s rare to see her this playful and Toni finds herself always marveling at the sight of Cheryl Blossom letting her hair down. _God she’s so in love with this girl._

“Why don’t I hear such protests when I’m going down on you?” The redhead exclaimed.

“It’s because you’re too preoccupied doing that.” Toni pinches her nose. “Hoooonk.”

Cheryl swatted her hand away and then cuddled closer to her girlfriend. “I love you. I really, _really_ do.”

Toni runs her hand on the girl’s hair, in awe of how flawless her girlfriend is with mood shifts like that. “I love you too, princess.”

And the two stayed like that for a while, Cheryl tracing patterns on Toni’s arm, and the brunette playing with her girlfriend’s hair. They’re both enjoying the proximity and the dim of the room. It wasn’t until they heard a notification from Toni’s phone that the two pulled away.

Toni reaches for it blindly, unlocking her phone.

**Sweets [ 8:36pm] : it’s all set, tiny.**

“Who’s that?” Cheryl asks.

“I-It’s just Sweet Pea. He wants help asking Ronnie to prom.” Was all Toni could come up with. It was leaving her mouth before she could even think about it. _Shit_. Now she’s gonna have to talk to her two friends.

She glances at Cheryl, seeing the redhead tense up at the mention of prom. She really hopes Cheryl could be more patient with her. It’s not exactly easy to pull off the perfect promposal especially because Toni wants to keep it that way. _Perfect_ , the way Cheryl deserves it.

“Sweet Pea and V…huh. That’s weird. I always thought Frida Shallow’s still pining over Archie and she’s only using Reggie for...god knows what…but okay.” Cheryl shrugged.

“Okay, let’s not talk about them, babe. What do you wanna do?” Toni tries to change the topic. She tapped Cheryl’s butt signaling her to get off and thankfully, the redhead did not protest anymore.

Toni turned the lights on and then made her way back to the couch.

Cheryl studies the place. It’s much smaller than she thought it would be. And everything is in one room. It’s cramped and it’s so far from what she had at Thistlehouse but as she looks into the eagerness in Toni’s eyes, all she could do is smile.

“We could start unboxing your things, in _your_ apartment.” Cheryl encourages. “TT, you have an apartment.”

“I know right. It still feels unreal. Like, it’s my space.” She says carefully so as to avoid offending her girlfriend. “Crazy, right?”

“I’m so proud of you, mon amour.” And she means that. Even though she’s going to miss Toni like _crazy,_ going to miss waking up to her every morning, going to sleep wrapped up in her arms. Cheryl still thinks it’s easier for the brunette to just live with her at Thistlehouse. But she learned that as Toni’s girlfriend, the only thing important is Toni’s happiness. And with Toni, she doesn’t need to work hard. Toni wants her for her. Not for what she can give her.

“Before the tears make their appearance again, I have something for you.” Cheryl rolled her eyes. Toni makes a detour over the fridge to retrieve something on top of it and then settled back on the couch. She hands Cheryl a small piece of metal. “Don’t worry. It’s not another flash drive with a video of me kissing some dude.”

Cheryl gives the girl her best glare. She then pokes her side playfully, glancing at the key on her hand before launching into Toni’s arms for a hug.

Toni laughs, rubbing Cheryl’s back. “I’m also clearing out a drawer for you, once I get fully settled in. Or—or is that too soon?”

Cheryl shakes her head lightly.

“You’re welcome to stay here whenever you want.”

“Thank you, TT.”

“It’s nothing, cutie.” She gave her a smile. “I’ll order pizza. What do you want babe? My treat. And then let’s see what we can watch in that crappy TV.”

“Anything, Toni. Anything.”

 

* * *

 

“Toni is right you know.”

The voice distracted Cheryl from zoning out completely. She was just telling Leah everything that’s been happening, Toni getting a new apartment, her progress with boxing, how her panic attack never came back, neither did her nightmares. It’s like she’s living in a really good dream.

“Hmm?”

“When she said you shouldn’t wait for bad things to happen. They’re going to happen, Cheryl. They happen to all of us. But you have got to stop denying yourself of feeling things, especially good things.”

That last part hit particularly deep for Cheryl. All she could think about were the years she spent suppressing her sexuality all because her own mother couldn’t accept her for what she is.

“Here’s what I’ve observed from this past week’s sessions. Is it okay if I tell you?” The counselor gave her  a warm smile, and so she nods. “You are a perfectionist. And based on your stories with your mother and your father, I can’t blame you for being one. You don’t like it when things aren’t perfect for you. And so you do something about it. But you know, once in a while things get really messed up. And I want you to know that you have nothing to be afraid of anymore. You’re out of your mother’s grasp, you can let yourself feel, Cheryl. You can let it...how do kids say it? suck? You can let it suck for a while. Embrace the suck.”

Cheryl would’ve snickered at the wordings of the young counselor if she didn’t think she was right. “Embrace the suck…” Cheryl repeats.

“Yeah, embrace it. Be perfectly imperfect.”

Cheryl remembers Toni’s words to her during the storm. _I fell in love with you because you weren’t. You had flaws._ And she thinks maybe if she lets her guard and bitchy persona down more often like she does with Toni, people will start to see the real her more.

 

* * *

 

It was safe to say the redhead was agitated. First, Toni wouldn’t have sex with her, which she totally understands. Well, trying to understand. Don’t get her wrong, she loved Toni for it. But _god,_ is she struggling to keep it in her pants for what? Two weeks now? Right, two weeks. And two weeks is too long for someone who’s been getting laid pretty regularly for the past year.

So yeah, she was pissed.

And it’s not just that. Toni hasn’t replied properly to her texts today or last night either. Not to mention, she’s also running late to class. She gets that she’s probably busy with her new apartment, getting settled in but _fuck_ she needs her _Toni time._ She knows she’s sounding really lame inside her head. And it’s the starving attention monster inside of her talking.

So she closes her eyes, takes a deep breath and tries to imagine how her precious girlfriend’s eyes light up every time someone brings up her new apartment. It wasn’t big, and everything inside are bargains from thrift shops but it was Toni’s.

She tries using basic analogy, like what Leah told her. _I love Toni, Toni loves the new apartment, and so therefore, I love the new apartment._

 _I love the new apartment._ She repeats it over and over in her head. _I love the new apartment._ Even though, it’s hogging pretty much all her Toni time.

The redhead smiles at herself over the small heart-shaped mirror attached on her locker door. _It’s okay._ Toni promised it’s not going to happen again. And she trusts Toni.

“Ever the narcissist, Cheryl Blossom.” She hears Josie say from behind her.

She gives her friend a chuckle and an eye roll. “I was giving myself a pep talk, about Toni…”

“Uh huh, girl giving you a hard time again?”

“No. No, not exactly.”

The two ladies started walking, Josie looking at her like she’s just buying it.

“Spill, bombshell…”

“She’s just busy moving in to her new place. It’s fine.” The redhead says softly. “I’m still learning how to deal with it.”

Josie gives her a reassuring smile. “You’re doing great, Cher.”

They both stop in front of Josie’s locker. And then, the dark skinned woman was squealing in surprise and excitement at the sight of her very bright, very pink and very in-your-face locker decoration. Inside was a tiny cut out picture of a certain redheaded boy, holding a note that says, “ _will you go to prom with me?”_ along with rose petals and pictures of the two from a photo booth hanging in glitter lights.

And then Cheryl feels Archie Andrews himself  hovering beside her.

“Hey.” He says to the both of them.

Cheryl was a deer in the headlights. She doesn’t know what to do but smile at the couple.

“You totally pimped my locker!” Josie exclaimed, jumping into her now _official_ boyfriend’s arms.

“So? Will you?” The redheaded boy prompted.

“As if there’s an answer aside from yes.” Josie rolled her eyes before giving Archie a kiss.

As much as Cheryl wants to glare at the couple and be bitter that her own love life is malnourished, she knows she’s happy for them. “You guys are so disgusting.” She feigned gagging before snapping a photo of the two.

Part of her feels sad, expecting Toni to do some extravagant thing like this. But she knows if she’s going to end up holding the love of her life’s hand at prom, she’s already one lucky gal. _Okay, but still._ Maybe...

She tucks her phone back in her pocket, a sigh of relief escaped her mouth. _There she is,_ power walking towards the trio. She looks extremely tired, but _beautiful_ nevertheless. Always beautiful.

“Hey babe, sorry I’m late. There was an electricity problem and so my alarm apparently wasn’t plugged in. I’m so sorry.” She gives the redhead a hurried kiss. “Here’s your coffee. I’m just going to get my stuff in my locker. And then I’ll walk you to class. Donthatemeloveyou.”

Cheryl was dumbfounded. Toni was running away before she could even blink.

She finds herself carefully eyeing the cup. She thought it would be the perfect way for Toni to ask her, just a lazy ‘ _prom?’_ haphazardly scribbled in her girlfriend’s own handwriting on the cup. But nothing. She pouted. _Okay._

“Wow, coffee and a kiss.” Josie says, rubbing circles on Archie’s arm.

The redhead smirked. “It’s the best part of my day.”

 

* * *

 

By the time lunch rolled around, Cheryl was antsy. With all the promposals happening around them left and right, she couldn’t blame herself. _Of course she wouldn’t._

Even that beanie wearing hobo had asked cousin Betty in front of everyone. And that’s saying something because Cheryl just knows that those two are the type who’d just sit down and discuss things like, you know prom.

She looks at Toni forking her fries, her loud chewing starting to set Cheryl’s impatient bum off.

“What?” The brunette asks her.

“Nothing.”

 

* * *

 

 

They walk together towards class. They have the next period together. And by this point, Cheryl fears if she’s going to get asked at all. Toni might think that because they’re a couple, it’s given. So she’s just going to straight up talk to her girlfriend. _Communication is key._

Or maybe she’ll just ask Toni. To prom. There’s nothing wrong with that.

So she tugs their intertwined hands, stopping the brunette from stepping in.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, TT...uh…” _fuck, she did not think this through._

“Hey, what’s up?” Toni places a hand on her cheek.

“Are you gonna ask me or what?” The redhead stomped a foot.

“What? Babe, what are you talking about?”

But before she could open her mouth, Toni’s phone is going off in her pocket.

“Hold that thought. It’s Sweet Pea. He’s never called me before, like ever. Must be important.” Toni places several kisses on the redhead’s cheek.

“I love you, don’t hate me.”

The redhead rolls her eyes, pouting and stomping as she enters the room.

_“Nice save, Sweets.”_

 

* * *

 

 

“You know you’re going to suffocate your feet.”

Cheryl hears Betty behind her. She groans, tugging on the shoelaces of her white sneakers even tighter. She adjusts her Vixens uniform, her pout longer than that of a swordfish.

“If your shoes don’t feel comfortable, you might fall or trip risking yourself of injuries like sprain or even splitting your ankle in two.”

The redhead groans even louder. “Let’s be real, cousin. You don’t really care about my ankle. So what do you want?”

The blonde raised an eyebrow at her. “Hey, I’m just looking out for you. You seem upset. Do you want to talk about it?”

Betty sits on the bench with her, which surprised the redhead. She can’t even remember the last time she had a meaningful conversation with her blonde cousin. In fact, she doesn’t even know if they’ve had one at all. Something that doesn’t involve serial killer fathers or drug lord mothers.

Cheryl sighs. She’s going to try. She promised herself she’s going to. “Fine. Since you’re…” _god, it’s hard._ “You’ve been in a relationship longer than I have, I guess you can help me. But do _not_ disappoint me. If you do, I’m never talking to you again.”

The blonde chuckles. _Cheryl Blossom asking her for relationship advice._ “I’m all ears.”

 

* * *

 

 

After what felt like hours of Cheryl just ranting to Betty about not just her current Toni and prom situation but also everything that happened in the past two weeks, the two managed to pull themselves out of the gym lockers to start Vixen practice.

But what Cheryl saw after opening the double doors of Riverdale High’s gym was enough to floor her. Absolutely floor her.  

Everyone’s here.

The whole student body.

Like there’s a basketball game. But there isn’t.

There are lights everywhere. Phone lights.

She feels anxiety bubbling in her stomach. Which is weird because she’s never had it when there are eyes on her.

But god, it’s there.

Everyone’s there too.

She recognizes Sweet Pea and Fangs at the farthest right corner of a line where boys and girls stood.

She sees Veronica looking at her with a shit eating grin on her face. Archie and Josie are there too.

Pink and red balloons scattered around the spacious room along with different decors of the same colors.

It looks like it came straight out of pinterest.

Cheryl looks to Betty, who motioned for her to step in.  

So she did.

One foot in front of the other.

T’was nothing but the sound of her footsteps. Everyone is quiet, like they’re all holding their breaths.

She steps closer, and closer, and closer until she sees _her._

Cheryl’s mind short circuited.

What. The.

Toni. She’s here.

She’s in the middle.

Toni in tight black slacks and a white button up shirt neatly tucked around her waist.

Toni holding a big bouquet of red flowers. A little bigger for her to hold if she’s being honest.

Her brown locks with pink stripes graciously curled, falling perfectly on her shoulders.

 _Jesus Christ._ She looks good.

The redhead’s jaw hang open, and Toni laughed at her.

“Antoinette Topaz, what is going on?”

The brunette shrugged. Toni was beaming at her like a child, motioning for her to step closer.

The brunette snapped her fingers and then one by one the people lined up, Poisons and Serpents, open their jackets revealing a white shirt painted with red letters on them.

For a moment, Cheryl’s mind couldn’t work. She feels dumb staring at the letters. But then slowly she reads.

**WILL YOU GO TO PROM WITH ME?**

Her heart was beating in her chest so loud, she feels like she’s going to have another panic attack. _Is this real?_ Maybe she’s experiencing hallucinations again. So she swallows thickly.

Toni really did all this. It’s real.

“What do you say, Bombshell?” Toni prompts. “These roses are red. Your lipstick is red. I don’t know what to say. Don’t make me stand here all day.”

Cheryl laughs at her girlfriend’s attempt to rhyme.

“Be my date for the prom?”

Cheryl could feel her eyes water. She couldn’t care less of her HBIC rep. Toni is being so soft with her. So she moves her legs as fast as she could running straight to her TT.

Toni almost loses her balance at the force of Cheryl’s hug, but she managed, wrapping her free hand around the redhead’s torso.

“Is that a yes?”

Cheryl sniffs. She’s probably going to regret tearing up in front of the whole student body later. She reaches for Toni’s face, cradling it with so much love and passion before she’s pressing their lips together.

“Oui, mon amour.” The redhead says.

The lights open and then the band is playing something. She pulled Toni in for another kiss.

_Yep, she’s never getting tired of this. Not now. Not ever._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> eeeeek idk where this came from tbh im very sleep deprived. thank you for reading this fic. and thank you for sticking by my shitty writing. i love you all.


	9. the way we love is so unique

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it’s the day of prom. cheryl finds out something. some fluff. and more fluff.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi! i’m sorry for posting this a day late. had a lot on my plate. but here it is anyway. 
> 
> writing domestic choni fluff is really really funnnn. Anyways. Enjoy.

Looking at the utter chaos happening before her eyes, Cheryl Blossom realizes one thing:  _ it sucks.  _

Everything sucks. 

The tables and chairs were all out of place. The lights aren’t working. The colors aren’t the right shade. And don’t get her started with the stage decorations. It’s all a mess, one big hot mess. 

And to think the prom is tonight. 

_ Embrace the suck.  _ She replays in her head. She tries to breathe deep, squeezing the freshly bought latte in one hand. She couldn’t believe she’s going to have a bitchy episode this early in the morning, specially after the kiss-coffee routine with Toni.  _ Calm down, Cheryl. It’s too early to go all Cruella Deville.  _

Plus, she’s trying this new thing called being nice. 

But when she sees someone try to put up a fake Eiffel Tower prop that looks a little close to, and she cannot stress over it enough, a male genitalia, she feels the angel of good dying on her left ear.  

_ That’s it.  _

“VERONICA CECILIA LODGE!” The redhead screamed, stopping everything at once. She continues to breathe hard, seeing the Latina rush up to her, with cousin Betty in tow. 

“Cheryl! She’s having another panic attack call Toni.” The raven haired girl said. 

“DON’T CALL TONI, I AM NOT HAVING A PANIC ATTACK. BUT I MIGHT ATTACK YOU...PHYSICALLY FOR ALL THIS...WHATEVER THE FUCK THIS IS!” The redhead exclaimed. 

“What?” The Latina furrowed her eyebrows. “I double checked everything and ran everything by you!”

“What is that?! I did not approve of that! Take  _ that _ monstrosity down now!” Cheryl pointed a finger over the piece of cardboard. “It looks...it looks like—ugh! I can’t even say it, I’m going to gag!” The redhead shivered in disgust. 

“Use your words!” 

“A PENIS!” 

Betty snorted, stopping as soon as she sees Cheryl giving her signature icy glare. Veronica turned around at once, glancing over the piece of cardboard and the boy taping it to the wall. The Latina rolled her eyes. 

“Kevin!” She calls, widening her eyes at their friend, motioning towards the stage. Kevin nodded and attended the situation straightaway. Veronica then paid her attention back to the fuming president. “That...is the prototype. I don’t know why it got there. But that,” the Latina trailed off, pointing over to a much better 3D model, “is the one you approved.”

Cheryl lets out an angry sigh. “Fine.” 

Veronica places a hand over the redhead’s shoulder, squeezing them tightly. “You need to relax, bombshell.” She teases. “Drink your coffee.”

“Why is everyone moving like prom is next year?!” The redhead cried out once again, startling the smug brunette. “You all need to stop slouching and start doing! The tables and chairs aren’t going to move by themselves!”

“Okay Cheryl, look at the staff that you assigned me. You gave me half of the mathletes and the theater people! I need muscle.” 

Cheryl rolled her eyes. “Fine.” She huffed, looking at Betty. “I’ll ask the Poisons and the Serpents if they can help us. In the meantime, keep an eye on this band of baboons. And double time people!” 

“That’s probably a good idea. Shall I go tell Jug and Toni now?” Betty suggested. 

“Wait, are you sure? Are they even in good terms?” Veronica asked. 

The blonde hummed, squinting her eyes. “They used to be in  _ super _ good terms. I’m sure they’re fine working with each other.”

“Plus, poisons and serpents drama is so last week. I’ll ask ma cherie, I’m sure she’ll be more than happy to be of assistance to  _ amour de sa vie.” _

Cheryl watched the exchange that happened before her eyes intensely. Veronica gave Betty a knowing look before giving her the smallest head shake known to existence. The blonde cleared her throat, looking around for anything to divert the topic. 

“What?” The redhead asked. “What is it? You two aren’t subtle enough.” She steps in between the two girls. “Spill. Now!”

 

* * *

 

“JUGHEAD JONES?!”

The sound of her fuming girlfriend startled the gang leader so much so that the brunette almost fell from the arm of the desk she was propped on, Veronica and Betty behind the redhead. 

Toni’s eyes widen, before they’re meeting Betty’s eyes.  _ Oh shit.  _

“Toni, Jughead Jones!”

It took Toni a solid minute to snap out of it, moving on her feet and placing a comforting hand on her girlfriend’s ams. “Um...babe, what is going on?”

Toni takes one hard look over the redhead’s face.  _ Shit,  _ this isn’t good. This isn’t good at all. 

“We need the Poisons and the Serpents at the gym right now. Prom preparations.” Veronica announced and Toni has never seen a room clear so fast. It was only the two of them and badass gang leader Toni Topaz could feel herself cowering under her girlfriend’s icy glare.  _ She still looks cute,  _ Toni thought. Just, the scary kind of cute.

So Toni looks down, shifting from one foot to the other.

“Toni.” 

“Babe?” Her head snapped up.

The brunette fights a smile. Cheryl’s response was nothing but a pout with her hands on her waist, and she must’ve noticed because she could swear she heard a low growl from Cheryl.  _ Okay damn, she must take this seriously.  _

“Don’t  _ babe _ me, Toni. Jughead Jones?!” The redhead whined.

“What about...Jughead, babe?” She asked in the most innocent tone she could muster. 

“Oh cut the crap, Antoinette.” Toni winced at the use of her full name. “You kissed him.”

Toni opens her mouth to say something, wanting to say anything but instead she just looked like a fish out of water. She really needs to improve communicating with Cheryl during times like these. 

“Say something!” 

Toni panics, reaching for the redhead’s arms and rubbing smooth circles on them. “I’m sorry?” 

The redhead growls, rolling her eyes and shaking her head. “Wrong answer! Babe, tell me it isn’t true!” Cheryl exclaimed stomping her feet. “You did not kiss that beanie head!”

“Okay first of all, it’s in the past. It happened before I even met you.” She said, placing a hand on the redhead’s face. “And second, it doesn’t matter now. Okay? I’m with you.”

“Of course it matters Toni! He’s Jughead Jones!”

“Okay, my standard feels insulted.”

But the redhead had pouted even more. “Imagine how I feel about that.”

Toni sighed. As much as she wants to avoid upsetting Cheryl the day before prom, and her  _ ‘Big Finish’  _ as she liked to call it, she promised her she would be honest with her. She promised transparency and so she took another deep breath.  _ Here goes nothing.  _

“I’m sorry I haven’t got the chance to tell you, baby. I promise I didn’t mean to.”

“Did you have feelings for him?” Cheryl asks immediately.

“I-I...no? I didn’t think so?” The brunette stammered. 

“You don’t think so? As in you’re not sure?” 

“I love you?”

“Ugh! Have fun dancing by yourself later.”

Cheryl storms out leaving very confused and very dazed Toni alone with her thoughts .  _ God, being Cheryl Blossom’s girlfriend,  _ everyone’d think she’d have a handle on it by now. 

“BABY! I’m sure you don’t mean that?!”

_ Well shit.  _

* * *

 

 

“ Archie told me you might be here.” 

Cheryl stops for a second, glancing over her previous gang leader, desperately catching her breath. Thank fuck for the literal punching bag that she’s beating for almost an hour since she decided to play hooky or it’ll be his face instead. 

To be honest, Cheryl doesn’t know why she’s so upset over it either. It happened before she met Toni. And it was just a kiss, right? If she can forgive Toni for drunk kissing someone in  _ their  _ current timeline, then why is she so mad about it? Maybe it’s just the Jughead Jones factor more than anything else. 

“Are you trying to imagine my face?” The beanie wearing boy asked, adjusting his leather jacket. 

The redhead continues to punch. “Maybe. Did Toni send you here?”

“Maybe.” 

“What do you want, hobo?” Cheryl pants continuing her assault towards the bag. 

Jughead shrugged. “Okay you’re right. Toni threatened me, held me by the lapels of my jacket and told me that if I don’t go and talk to you, she’ll slice me open and put all my organs inside my beanie.” 

“Sounds about right.” Cheryl chuckled sarcastically, doing a perfect jab-cross-right hook. 

“Ooh.” The serpent gasped. “And she also told me that you can do that now and I should be careful with my words.”

“And what is it exactly that you want to say, pray tell?”

“That I’m sorry.” Jughead responds. 

Cheryl scoffed. “About the kiss?”

“About everything. The kiss, the PG-13 grope session after…”

“There’s a PG-13 grope session after?!” The redhead exclaimed before punching the bag five times, the sound of the hits taking over the cramped gym. 

Jughead stood awkwardly, his mouth hung open staring at how the angry redhead beat the punching bag like her life depended on it, or his own face attached to it. Either way. “Why does it matter, Cheryl? It happened in the past. And did I mention she rejected me before anything could even begin?”

“She did?” That seem to interest Cheryl. 

The serpent nods. “It was a weird time for me and Betty and I were on a break. And I guess, she was there for me as a friend. And uh, she basically told me she wasn’t interested in becoming somebody’s rebound and that she’s more into girls anyway. She probably forgot to tell you about it because it doesn’t matter to her at all.”

Cheryl pauses for a second, trying to absorb what her former gang leader had said. 

“Look, I know you’ve never really  _ not  _ look down on me. But deep down I know you’re upset because I’m the one who got you and Toni kicked out of the Serpents. It just so happened that we also shared a kiss.”

Cheryl swallows, putting her fists down and looking Jughead in the eye. 

“You can wear that invisible crown in your head all you want, but you also know deep down you had no right to kick Toni out of the gang.” Cheryl stopped there. She knows she’s half of the reason why Toni got kicked out and she’s not about to admit that in front of Jughead Jones. 

Jughead gave her a tight-lipped smile. “Of course I did. But that doesn’t necessarily mean I made the right decision. That’s why I’m here. To apologize. I went overboard with that stupid code, but I did what I had to do. The serpents needed the job. And you were the price to pay.” 

Cheryl rolled her eyes and then went back to beating the bag. 

“But on the bright side, I think it doesn’t matter much if I regret my decision. Toni looks happy where she is right now.” 

Panting, she reaches for the bottle of water and chugged a decent amount of it before turning her attention back to the serpent. “Are you done? You can exit right where you entered.”

 

Jughead sighed. “Toni loves you, Cheryl. You can be upset at me all you want, but please don’t take it out on her. Plus, she’s been planning for this for  _ weeks  _ now.”

Cheryl rolled her eyes once more. “I wasn’t planning on really ditching her. It just feels...nice watching her squirm in panic.”

“Only you would find that cute.” Jughead said shaking his head and chuckling. “Listen, I’m really sorry. I guess I’m speaking in behalf of the serpents too. I just want this stupid bad air between serpents and poisons to be gone. Riverdale High’s big enough for us to co-exist.”

“Then I shouldn’t be the one you should be apologizing too.” 

“I know. And I did.”

Cheryl gives him a curt nod. That’s all that matters to her now, knowing that he apologized to Toni. The serpent turned around, ready to leave when Cheryl calls him for the last time. And by his full name. 

“Forsythe Pendleton Jones III!”

Jughead turns around. 

“Truce.” 

He simply nods and then made his way out. 

 

* * *

 

Toni unmounts her bike, a bit of anxiety taking over her as she swipes the key from under the doormat and then unlocking the door belonging to the house she once called her own. Jughead had told her through text that her girlfriend was indeed at the boxing gym and that they had their talk already. Cheryl would be at home by then but Toni lets another hour pass just to be sure. 

“Cher.” She calls softly from the entrance of the bedroom, catching the attention of the redhead. Toni takes note that her girlfriend is still on her full boxing gear. 

Cheryl looked up, zipping her bag close as she meets Toni’s eyes. She tilts her expressionless face, waiting for the brunette to say something. 

“How was your session?” Toni stuffed her hands inside her jacket, leaning on the doorway. 

“Eventful.” Cheryl looks at her bag, idly rummaging through her stuff. “Jughead talked to me.”

The brunette did her signature head tilt up with a raise of her eyebrows, motioning for Cheryl to go on. “And?”

“He apologized. For everything.” Cheryl deadpanned. But truth be told, she’s settled her feelings on it already. She’s done some significant growing over the past few weeks and she’s kind of proud of the progress she’s done. But that doesn’t mean she won’t use this for her advantage for as long as she can…especially ‘cause she wants her  _ princess time.  _

But Toni must’ve seen through her because she doesn’t seem like she’s really, genuinely panicking. She has a playful smirk on her face and Cheryl just knows, she needs to up her game another level. 

“For the kiss…” The redhead continues. “For the PG-13 grope session that you two had, amongst other things.”

Toni laughs, making a beeline towards the edge of Cheryl’s four poster bed where the redhead stood. Toni licks her lips, sporting a sheepish grin on her face as she tugs on the string of Cheryl’s boxing shorts. 

The redhead fell on her lap, draping an arm around Toni’s neck lazily, a massive pout still adorning her face. She could shiver feeling Toni’s breaths on her cheek. And it wasn’t long until the brunette is peppering kisses on her cheek either. 

_ Damn, Cheryl Blossom always wins.  _

“Okay, what’s really got my baby all pouty?” Toni continued drawing circles on the redhead’s thigh. “You can’t seriously risk losing prom queen because of a stupid kiss that happened way before I even met you.” 

“Correction. It wasn’t just a kiss.” The redhead whined. “And who said I won’t be going to prom anyways? I just won’t be going with you.” 

Toni raised another eyebrow at her acting girlfriend. “You won’t do that to me!” The brunette gasped before planting the loudest kisses on her girlfriend’s neck. Cheryl released a soft giggle while Toni felt bold wiggling her index finger on the redhead’s waist, while snuggling closer to her. 

“Toni!” Cheryl exclaimed, immediately reaching for Toni’s offensing finger. “I swear to God, you know how much I hate it when you do that.” 

“Do what?” Toni mocked, attacking Cheryl’s waist once again. 

The redhead struggled to contain her laughs but it wasn’t long until she’s a panting mess on her smug girlfriend’s lap. Cheryl lets out loud cackles that would’ve made her deserving of a painful pinch in the arm if her mother could hear her. 

Toni looks at the redhead, all while attacking her waist with tickles, and it’s like Cheryl is a song that she can never get out of her head. A song that has a good verse and an even better chorus. The whole world seems to stop, and Toni hated clichés, but something tells her it won’t matter much as long as she’s around Cheryl Blossom. 

The sound of the redhead’s laughs echoed around the room, making Toni’s heart flutter. She really couldn’t do it. She can’t  _ not _ be a part of this redhead’s life. She can’t love anybody else. 

“Toni! My cheeks hurt...stop!” Cheryl demanded making another attempt to stand up and move away from Toni, but the brunette’s grip was firm around her waist. 

Toni, finally realizing she’s had enough, stopped her attacks and just held a panting Cheryl on her lap. “Okay, I’m done. I’m done, I promise.”  

Cheryl moved one leg and planting it on the other side of Toni’s body. “I hate you.” She muttered, pressing their foreheads together. 

“I’m sure you do.” Toni tilts her head up, pressing a soft kiss on her girlfriend’s now nude lips. It starts innocent at first, it always does. But then Cheryl runs a hand over the pink streaks in her hair, and licks her bottom lip and suddenly Toni’s head is spinning. The kiss grows heated in a matter of seconds. And Toni finds herself struggling not to flip them both over, pin Cheryl down on the bed and make her scream until she couldn’t anymore. 

Toni has got to be the one to pull away. And so she does. 

Cheryl hummed, running her tongue over her top lip. “Virgin Toni makes her appearance once again.” 

Toni rolls her eyes, cupping a handful of the redhead’s ass. 

“Don’t worry, babe. I find it... _ extremely appealing.”  _

“So I get my prom date back?” 

Cheryl lets out what Toni thought to be the most seductive laugh known to human existence. “Not...before you…” She trails off, tracing her index finger along the brunette’s chin. Her face suddenly changes back to normal. “Write me an entire list of people you’ve been with.” 

Toni blinks at once. “What?”

“Hook ups, relationships, kisses…”

“Even the ones by spin the bottle?”

“Do you want to be dancing with  _ moi  _ tonight,  _ mon chéri _ ?”

“Cheryl, are you serious?” 

“Dixie chicks serious.”

“Why? Don’t you think I’ve suffered enough already?” Toni whined, pressing her forehead onto her girlfriend’s shoulders. 

“Because! Who knows, I might be walking in the same premises as them? Or worse? I could be going to the same hair salon as them!”

Toni snorted. “I’ve stayed on the Southside all my life. Trust me when I say you don’t have to worry about going to the same salon as my past...people.”

“Toni!”

“Cher, they don’t matter anymore!”

“‘ _ They’?!  _ How many is  _ they,  _ Toni?”

“Look, I’m with the hottest, sexiest, most beautiful person right now. And I still believe I’m taking her to prom tonight. Isn’t that all that matters?”

“No.” Cheryl answered as Toni lets out another frustrated sigh. “I can give you mine, you!”

“Um, you kissed Archie Andrews, babe. Oh and Moose Mason!” 

Cheryl rolled her eyes. “Those were barely kisses.”

“But still!” The brunette exclaimed. “Look, it doesn’t matter who I hooked up with in the past, Cher. What matters is, you’re the only person I want to hook up with  _ for the rest of my life.” _

There was a short pause after that. It’s like Toni’s smartass rebuttals backfired. Either girls shocked at Toni’s little declaration. Cheryl’s heart feels like it’s going to explode in her chest. 

“F—for the rest of your life?”

Toni managed to calm down, placing her hand on Cheryl’s face, rubbing her cheek with the pad of her thumb. “ _ I’m cuckoo bananas for you, obvi!”  _ Toni said, mimicking her girlfriend as best as she could. 

Cheryl lands a playful slap on Toni’s shoulder.  _ God, only Toni Topaz could do this to her.  _

_ “Won’t you be my date to the prom?”  _ Toni continues. “Without that...stupid list you’re trying to make me do. Babe, I know I promised you could ask me and I would tell you everything that you need to know but trust me when I say, you don’t need to know this.”

Cheryl smiles, taking a deep breath before nodding. “Okay.”

Toni’s face sported an unstoppable grin. “I’m so proud of your progress baby. In everything.”

The redhead smirked. “I know, right? I’m doing it. I’m taking Leah’s advice. I’m breathing and listening and trying not to think about all your past conquests, how many they are…”

“Good. They’re all from the Southside anyways.” Toni reassures. “Except for...for Liz who was a Serpent—and then she’s now in the Poisons…”

“WHAT?!”

“We barely dated, baby. Trust me.”

Cheryl’s mouth hang open. “Okay.” She said, getting off of the brunette’s lap. “I can’t—“ was all she could say before she’s disappearing into the en suite bathroom. 

“Wait, cher! You’ll still go to the prom with me, right?”

Toni hears an indistinct NO from the bathroom before she’s crashing on the bed, inhaling her girlfriend’s scent and smiling. 

“I’ll pick you up at 6, baby!”

 

 

All her life Cheryl thought she doesn’t belong. She had Jason and he protected her and loved her and made her feel like she’s wanted but she never truly felt like they belong to each other. Jason belonged to Polly and Jason belonged to their parents and their family business and where did that leave her? 

But she completely understands. She loved, adored and admired her twin brother immensely for being that shelter of protection and love for her. So when he died, Cheryl was left out of love and anything that came close to that. 

Not until Toni

There is nothing in this world that could ever make her feel as loved and as wanted as Toni Topaz looking into her eyes, corsage on one hand and her camera on the other. 

And Cheryl tries to think, so she fumbles with the corsage she has on her own hand. She used to absolutely hate feeling dumb. But being in a relationship with one Toni Topaz, she learned that it’s something that’s going to constantly happen. Especially because Toni is here, on her doorway...wearing a tight long black gown. Her hair fell softly into big waves of pink on her shoulders.  _ Angel. Goddess.  _

_ Fuck, what word is it?  _ There is a word for it. Cheryl knows there is. And she’s desperately trying to find it inside her head. 

Elega—no. Eth— _ ethereal.  _

_ That’s it. Ethereal.  _

And it’s like her throat closed up on its own again. She could see how dangerously low cut the dress is in the back. 

“You look beautiful.” Toni says, snapping a photo of her before giggling. She let her camera dangle loose around her neck before fidgeting for the red and white set of corsage on her hand. “May I?”

Toni reached for her hand, planting a soft kiss over it before wrapping the ribbon around her wrist. Cheryl couldn’t stop gawking at her girlfriend. Even after seeing the girl on different occasions, she still manages to go into shock at how extremely well the brunette cleans up. 

Cheryl shakes her head and tries to focus on the task at hand. It’s her turn to put the baby blue and pink corsage on her girlfriend. Toni chuckles at her struggle. 

The brunette takes one long look over her girlfriend as well and she mentally high fives herself.  _ Damn,  _ she really did bag the hottest girl in Riverdale. 

She always did love how the redhead’s pale skin contrasted the color red. And she just couldn’t wait to leave marks on that patch of flawless skin on her shoulders. And  _ god,  _ that high slit is enough to put Toni into cardiac arrest.

“Done, TT.” The redhead remarked. 

“You ready?” Toni extended a hand for her girlfriend to take. And Cheryl was just now registering where the two of then will be riding. Her jaw hung open at the sight of the ten-person limousine parked before the gates of Thistlehouse. “Don’t worry. I didn’t rob some rich guy and throw his body at the trunk. The guys and I pooled our money. Come on, beautiful.” She beckoned. “We’re picking up Josie next.” 

“Wait.” Cheryl tugged on their intertwined fingers. “Y-You look beautiful too, Toni.”

Toni chuckles, pulling on the redhead’s arms and pressing a soft kiss on her lips. 

“Come on. I can’t wait to show you off.” 

And together, they made their way to the limousine, as the window rolled down revealing the group inside. The cheers of their friends resounded along with the loud upbeat music. She feels Toni lift their hands and hears her shout for joy, gesturing towards her and mouthing “MINE”. 

And Cheryl thinks, Toni could lead her anywhere she wants.  _ Absolutely anywhere.  _ And she’s forever, forever going to let the brunette lead the way. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yo i really feel like a jughead interaction was something that needs to happen in order for them to heal properly. and i’m just now realizing how incredibly hard it is to write canon compliant. Lmao. I just hope this isn’t too ooc for all of them. 
> 
> anyways. hmu. Final chapter is the prom. And there’s gonna be smut, i hope that’s okay. Pray for my soul.


	10. and when touch i’m shivering

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> choni goes to prom !!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oh god i cried, literally shed tears writing this. enjoy. 
> 
> Also, take a shot for all the times you see “real” and “tug” maybe the hallucination fic slightly got to me.

Cheryl catches herself smiling. It’s the fifth time already since they boarded the ten-man limousine, along with their friends. It’s a little loud inside, a little messy. She doesn’t get to even blink before someone is snapping a photo, but Cheryl thinks she wouldn’t have it any other way. Especially because she’s here. With Toni and their friends....on the way to their senior prom. And this is all real. It isn’t a product of her imagination, or a powerful delusion. She’s here.

She takes another second to digest that information again. She’s on the way to her senior prom with Toni,  _ the love of her life.  _

And she flushes down every thought in her head that says she’s going to wake up soon, shivers at the thought of Penelope Blossom hearing her mind think.

But once in a while, she hears Toni’s laughs, and she reminds herself that it’s real. Her girlfriend has been sitting across her, trapped into taking selfies with Sweet Pea and Fangs for the past twenty minutes now. And she’s been looking at the girl for longer. God, she’s been feeling dumb ever since she opened the door and saw Toni in that tight black gown. 

And Cheryl thinks she’s unnerving Toni with her hard stare because she squints at her, a small flush crossing her cheeks. 

“Cheryl?” 

The redhead turns her head to meet Archie’s eyes. He stumbles, somehow managing to squeeze himself in the small space between her and Josie. 

“Is there something wrong? Why aren’t you having fun?” The boy asks, a hint of laughter in his voice despite his concerns.

“Oh I am,  _ cher frère.  _ I’m just taking a second to take all these in...I guess.” She looks down. “Archie...this is real, right? I’m _ happy, _ and this is real.”

The redheaded boy gives him his signature smile, and Cheryl’s heart settles. “It is, Cher. So you better take the moment.” Archie takes a sip of champagne. “And smile. Happy looks good on you.”

She takes a second to look back at Toni. “So I’ve been told.” That’s all the reassurance that she needs right there, and she’s never been more thankful to Archie Andrews for saving her life more than once. And as she looks at Toni looking back at them with the proudest, sweetest smile, something tells her she’s not the only one feeling like that .

And she feels the same too, for Sweet Pea and Fangs. She’s thankful for them for taking care of Toni during the years that she wasn’t in the brunette’s life, the years that nobody wasn’t. And Cheryl can truthfully see now, how important it is for Toni to have her family back. She used to think the brunette belongs to her. And she’s never felt more happy to be proven wrong. While Toni reassures her that she is indeed hers, Cheryl can safely conclude that Toni is her own person. And that it’s okay.  _ It’s okay to belong to yourself.  _ She belongs to herself now. She doesn’t belong to the Blossoms, she doesn’t belong to her mother’s hateful and homophobic remarks, and she doesn’t belong to her ugly past nor her fear of not belonging to something. She belongs to now. And now is good. 

She feels more than happy that Toni chose her to share her life with. It’s something so wonderful that she thinks she can never thank the universe enough for giving her. Because Toni chose her, out of seven point five billion, she chose her. 

She stops her eyes from watering, thinking about that. Those were words she’d never even consider before, with her conceited and self-centered manners. But now, she almost lost her and thinking about how Toni never gave up on them makes her want to cry again. Because she loves Toni...so much and Toni loved her back, chose her, continues to choose her...out of seven point five billion. She fought for her and because of that she’s on her way to her senior prom...with Toni. The love of her life.

God, it still feels unreal. She just used to fantasize about this. And now it’s happening. 

“Penny for your thoughts…” She hears someone whisper in her ear. And she doesn’t even need to look to know it’s Toni. Her heart just knows...just knows how to beat so fast whenever she’s close by. 

Cheryl smiles, shifting so she can accommodate the tiny brunette in their cramped position. Archie and Josie were kind enough to scoot so Toni could go back to her original position, by her girlfriend’s side. 

The brunette brushes the hair on her shoulders affectionately before pressing featherlight kisses on the skin there. She just couldn’t help herself. “Something wrong?”

Cheryl shakes her head gently. “Nothing, TT.” She whispers, ignoring the loud yelling from the friends in the background. “I’m just so happy.”

Toni laughs. “Me too, princess. I’m so looking forward to tonight. Specially ‘cause my girl gets to win prom queen tonight.” 

Cheryl used to think that was the dream...win prom queen. But no, it isn’t. The dream is here, sitting in front of her. And it isn’t just a dream now. 

“Damn, I really don’t know what I did to deserve this.” Toni adds. 

At that, Cheryl rolled her eyes. “Think it’s the other way around, TT. Plus, flattery will get you anywhere.”

“Oh I’m counting on that tonight, bombshell.” Toni sends her a wink. “That’s why I’m betting on all my best compliments tonight.”

Cheryl laughs. Two could play this game. She leaned in closer, her breath ghosting the brunette’s ear. “You sure you could handle me?” 

Toni places her hand on the redhead’s bare thigh, inching it higher and higher through the slit on her gown. “Oh I know i can. And if I were you, I wouldn’t spend all my energies on dancing tonight, ‘cuz you’re going to need it for what I have in store for you.” 

The redhead shivers, Toni’s own breath hitting her neck softly as she whispers back. “Baby, don’t be all talk…”

“Oh there wouldn’t be much talking tonight, I’m sure of that. It’s... _ fuck  _ first, and then talk later...if you’re still awake for that.” 

Cheryl bites her lip, after weeks of waiting, god...please. It’s taking her everything to stop herself from begging for Toni to just take her home and take her over and over and over...but it’s  _ their  _ senior prom. They will never get this back. They’ve waited long enough already. What’s a few hours, right? She can totally do this. 

“Hey, hey, hey! Break it up! Wait until the prom is over at least. Geez!” Sweet Pea yelled, putting everyone’s attention on them. Cheryl felt Toni’s hands lower as the brunette gives the tall Serpent her middle finger. 

Toni was about to say some witty remark about how awkward Archie, Josie, Sweet Pea and Veronica must feel being in the same limo when the ride stopped, and immediately cheers echoed around.  _ Shit, they’re here.  _

Cheryl took her hand, lacing their fingers together. “You ready,  _ mon trésor? _ ”

Toni grins, planting both hands on Cheryl’s cheek before pulling her for another soft kiss. “Ready! Come on, come on.” She exits the limousine, softly tugging Cheryl behind. 

As the two walk the red carpet, nothing else mattered to Cheryl. Not the flashes of camera technically blinding them, not the cheers of the people around. It’s an extraordinary thing, to have Toni lead her without doubting the brunette for a second. She trails behind and she doesn’t worry where Toni will lead her, she doesn’t think about anything but this girl’s hand in hers.

And it feels extremely liberating, to have this sort of trust towards someone without having it consume her. 

Toni holds her from behind while they take a picture. Of course, it was a lot of persisting. But after ten million snarky comments, Cheryl managed to get the photographer to take another one with her holding Toni. And now they have two sets. 

Toni tugs on her again, leading her towards the tables. “Where do you wanna sit, babe?”

Cheryl’s heart warms up at the sudden deja vu. “ _ Wherever you wanna sit, babe.”  _

The brunette’s eyes landed on the swarm of girls wearing black and purple. “I’m just going to say hi to them. And then we can sit with our friends. 

“But wait,” Cheryl stops the brunette before she could go. “Do you wanna sit there? Because we can.” 

“They’ll survive without me for once.” The brunette squeezed her hand. “And I wanna get back at Sweet Pea for earlier. Let me just think of something.” Toni was pecking her lips before she knows it and then she’s darting towards the Pretty Poisons’ table. 

She looks around taking in her surroundings. Veronica and Kevin did a great job and she makes a mental note to thank them later. Her peripheral vision tells her someone is approaching. So Cheryl turns her head to see the young counselor, wearing a black pantsuit. 

“Cheryl Blossom, you clean up very well.” Miss Burke remarked. 

Cheryl tried to take the proud smirk down a notch, she was talking to her guidance counselor after all. “I can say the same for you, Miss Burke.”

“How are you feeling?” The young counselor smiled. “I’m not trying to therapize you right now, just so we’re clear. I just want to know how you’re feeling...as a friend.”

Cheryl couldn’t help but roll her eyes. “I’m happy, Leah. More than I’ve ever been. Thank you for making me realize things.”

“Oh I didn’t do anything. I just sat down and listened to you talk and talk for hours. It was all you, hun. I just helped you through it.” Miss Burked put a reassuring hand on her arm, squeezing it a little. “Listen, as much as I’ll miss our sessions, don’t come in again. Not for a while, I think.”

“What? Why?” Cheryl snapped, furrowing her brows in confusion.  

The young counselor, amused by the redhead’s reaction, chuckled. “You’re free of the guidance office, Cheryl. You’ve done it. Although you can still technically come in, you know if you want someone to talk to, I’m there. But I think you should just spend those extra hours with your friends, your girlfriend...talk to them. I think you have to spend your energies making more meaningful relationships especially ‘cause you’re a senior.”

Cheryl released the breath that she was holding. 

“That’s why I won’t take too much of your time tonight. Go be young. And don’t be afraid to show people who you really are. And uh...your girlfriend is coming over here.” 

The redhead hasn’t been able to turn around before she felt arms snaking around her waist. Jealous Toni is something that can never fail to amuse her. Chuckling, she shakes her head. “Toni.” And god, her girlfriend has been so clingy lately too. 

“Miss Topaz, I was just telling Miss Blossom that she’s free of counseling for now.”

Toni raised an eyebrow. “Really?”

“Yes, really. But I told her the guidance office will always be open for her...and you. You know just someone you guys can talk to...if you want. You should come check it out.”

The brunette takes a deep breath. Huh, counseling. “Um, okay maybe.” Toni cleared her throat, looking at the encouraging smile Cheryl is giving her. “Thank you, Miss Burke. For uh, that and all your help with Cheryl.”

The young counselor beamed at the two women. “I’m happy to be of service. Guys, I would love to talk more but I really have to go. You ladies enjoy the night. Stay away from trouble. I will be watching you.” She teased, pointing two fingers at them before running off. 

“She’s great, isn’t she?” The two girls watched as the guidance counselor disappeared. 

The brunette scoffed at the smile on her girlfriend’s lips. “Please.” She muttered under her breath. 

“Why are you so mean to her?” Cheryl whined, tracing the brunette’s exposed back as she wraps her arm around her waist. 

Toni gasped. “What are you talking about? I just thanked her. I was polite.”

“Uh huh.”

“What?”

The redhead hummed, deciding to play this game a little longer because let’s face it, it’s amusing and it feels great. “I like her pantsuit. A real power statement.”

“But you like gowns  _ more,  _ right?” Toni asked expectantly. “Right?”

Cheryl was tracing patterns on the brunette’s back, leaning in. “Of course.” She whispers on her girlfriend’s lips before closing the gap. God, it’s like they’re  _ always  _ kissing, or touching and it’s making her head spin. The prom hasn’t even started. 

The redhead pulls away, before she’s letting the brunette lead her to their table. 

 

* * *

Her first dance of the night is Cheryl. It has to be Cheryl. 

But it wasn’t long until Sweet Pea and Fangs were taking their hands and both men slow danced the two women. With Sweet Pea taking Cheryl and Fangs taking Toni first. And then, they switch. 

Archie Andrews danced with Cheryl too. And then Josie Mccoy, all while teasing Toni with a smug face over the redhead’s shoulders. Toni feared her eyes getting stuck from too much eye rolling. 

And then they all jumped around for a while, with the upbeat music, with Jughead Jones and Betty Cooper leading the charge. Who knew, right? And the beanie wearing boy is surprisingly without his beanie tonight. 

And it wasn’t long before Sweet Pea is threatening to throw someone into the punch. When Toni rushed to see who it was, she wishes she had her hands on him instead. It was Tom. The watchers broke the fight and Sweet Pea surprisingly listened at one scold by Miss Burke. They leave him alone. He didn’t bother them all night. 

Kevin and Fangs became official. Cheryl was the first person Kevin had told and then Toni by extension. She later confronted Fangs and then congratulated the serpent in having his first official boyfriend. 

Toni then finds Cheryl and led her to the dancefloor once again. 

* * *

 

They’ve been dancing for an hour, maybe two...simply swaying into the music, Cheryl’s arms draped closely around her shoulders. She could feel the redhead’s breath on her skin. At this point Toni doesn’t even know what song is playing. All she knows is that it’s soft and they’re supposed to slow dance to it. And God, does she want to slow dance with Cheryl for the rest of the night. There is absolutely nothing in this fucking world that she’d rather be doing.

So she continues swaying their pressed bodies to the music more. She doesn’t care if the music is slightly lethargic, all she cares about is the woman in her arms. 

That is until Best Part by Daniel Caesar came on. 

Toni could her herself hum in approval as the intro of the song plays, the soft humming of the singer resounding in her ears. And then she finds herself whispering the lyrics into Cheryl’s ear, her hold on the redhead’s waist tightens.

_ You don't know, babe, when you hold me _

_ And kiss me slowly, it's the sweetest thing _

 

Cheryl raises her head and looks at Toni, for the first time in the past hour. And as Toni looks back, she could feel her heart seizing in her chest. 

She’s close. Too close, like she could almost see the single splashes of color that makes up the girl’s chocolate brown eyes. And Toni is in awe of how this sight still has the ability to bring her to her knees. It isn’t as light as before because now, she knows what it’s like to almost lose it. And it’s like all her feelings have reawakened and now they’re stronger than ever. 

Cheryl really took her in, after her collection of bad choices and moments of weakness. She really took her in, ready to start fresh, a clean slate. And Toni thinks, for a girl with the word “bitch” as a label, her girlfriend has the biggest heart.

And so Toni raises her hand to touch her girlfriend’s cheek, continuously humming the lyrics.

_ I just wanna see _

_ I just wanna see how beautiful you are _

_ You know that I see it, I know you're a star _

The redhead snuggles closer to her, burying her head into the crook of her neck. And Toni thinks, all those years she spent feeling alone, like nobody wanted her, they’re all preparing her for this...this moment right here where she feels the most wanted, in Cheryl’s arms, swaying to the cheesiest song, and feeling a love so intense and so profound like nothing, nothing in this world could ever compare.

_ It's the sunrise _

_ And those brown eyes, yes _

_ You're the one that I desire _

_ When we wake up _

_ And then we make love _

_ It makes me feel so nice _

She tries to look around the other couples dancing around them and somehow she feels this hubris forming in her chest. None of them have what they have. Cheryl’s taught her something no book or wise man ever could, just by being in her space and learning about her stories and sharing a life with her. Because that’s what they do, and that’s what Toni would like to do, probably for the rest of her life...share her life with Cheryl. 

She might sound foolish or people would tell her she’s too young but no, not too young to know she wants her, til her last living breath. She wants her. 

_ You're the sunshine on my life _

“I want you.” She whispers, while the chorus played. “For the rest of our miserable lives. I want you. I want the craziness, I want everything. And I know this might seem weird ‘cause I just moved out and all the things that happened between us and I don’t—I don’t have a ring. And—oh my god.” Toni stuttered. “This isn’t—this isn’t what it is! I’m not proposing. It’s not—it’s like a pre proposal...if that’s a thing. But like, I don’t know. It’s not even a pre proposal. It’s just me saying I want you forever, maybe...if you’d have me.”

The redhead was shocked, speechless. 

“We could...we could plan our future together. You know, college. We’ve never really talked about that after you got me into Highsmith. And uh, after college. How many kids you want...if—if you want some...oh my god, did that scare you?” The brunette panicked, backing away slightly. “I know it’s a little weird considering I just cleared a drawer for you at my place. And—and…”

“Hey,” the redhead chuckles, pulling Toni back into her embrace. She shakes her head at her girlfriend’s antics. This fool is literally forgetting that they lived together for months before she got her own place. “I want that too, TT. Let’s plan and maybe clear two drawers for me. One at a time.” 

Toni sighs, letting herself sink into the redhead’s embrace. “One at a time…” she repeats. “We’re doing it right this time?”

The redhead nods. “Yes, babe.” She kisses Toni’s ear. “I’ll never forget this.”

“Consider this a pre pre proposal, bombshell.”

Cheryl laughs, the song then arrives at its outro. And then they both see Principal Weatherbee taking center stage. The lights come to life and the couples dancing in pairs dissolved into a big crowd. 

“Students of Riverdale High, it’s time to announce prom king and queen.” 

Toni’s heart soared, looking at her girlfriend. Because she really managed to bag the hottest girl on campus, and probably the world. And so she claps, her eyes fixed on Cheryl. 

The girl gripped her hand and she could feel Cheryl thinking, could hear her heart beating loud in her ears, could see how incredibly nervous she is. “What’s wrong?” She asks the redhead. 

“Let’s go.”

“What?”

“Let’s  _ go.” _

Cheryl tugs on her arm while Toni’s face matched those of the people they were passing through. And she’s so confused. Now she’s internally panicking. Did she say something that might’ve turned Cheryl off? Was it a little too much, her confession? 

“Cheryl, stop wait.” Toni managed to stop their tracks before they could exit the doors. “What’s going on? Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, TT.”

“Then why are we leaving? Is it because you’re nervous? You don’t have to be, baby. We all know you’re going to win.”

“It’s not that, Toni. Come on!” The redhead tries to pull her again. 

“Cheryl, you’ve been waiting for this all your life. I know…this is the dream, babe. Remember?”

“No. The dream is you, Toni!” She argues back. “I don’t want to be up there without you. I don’t want to dance with anybody else but you. So come on. Let’s ditch this thing. What do you say?”

_ God.  _ “I fucking love you so much.” Toni smashes their lips together. It isn’t gentle, not in the slightest, but it is powerful and passionate. The kind of kiss that gets you feeling like you’re ready to take on the world. 

And as the two ladies ran into the moonlight, they could barely hear the sound of the echoes calling Cheryl Blossom. It was all giggles and small confessions of love as the owner of the name being called lets one Toni Topaz lead her to the uncertain world. 

 

****

* * *

 

Cheryl wasn’t dumb enough to know where this trail leads. Toni in a black gown hasn’t yet consumed all her remaining brain cells, thankfully. She knows it’s the way back to the brunette’s studio apartment. 

But that’s all she knows. 

They’ve been laughing for the entire ride and she hasn’t really gotten to believe that she really ran away from her own prom queen coronation. But as her girlfriend stumbles to get the door of her small apartment unlocked, she thinks it was worth it. 

She doesn’t miss the way Toni touches her on the ride here either, doesn’t overlook the way Toni’s gaze would fall from her eyes to her lips and then to her body. And she can’t believe that they’re  _ here.  _ At this point, they’re ready. So ready. They’ve been ready for a while now. But Cheryl knows it’s better than to follow her girlfriend’s lead. 

Toni manages to get the hinge unlocked before she’s giggling and facing Cheryl. “This is a really big diversion from the plan. Close your eyes.” 

“Babe, why?”

“Just do it, please.” Toni demanded. 

Cheryl tries to reason out, opens her mouth to say something, but decides against it and just lets her eyelids flutter shut. 

She hears Toni open the door and she feels her gently dragging her inside. “Wait! Don’t open them just yet.” Toni’s hand disappeared from her arm and for a moment, she felt scared because it’s literally dark. But then again, she trusts Toni so she takes a deep breath. “Wait...don’t open them just yet.” She hears the brunette again, chuckling. 

“Toni, what is going on…” It was a statement more than a question. 

“You still have your eyes closed?”

“Yeah. What is taking this so long?”

“Can you be patient please? It’s not exactly eas—eyes still closed?”

Cheryl sighs impatiently. “Yes, Toni.” 

“Open them.”

Slowly, her eyelids open. And it was...dark. Just dark. 

“Uh...babe?”

And then it flashes before her eyes. Toni...did this. She did all of this. She hung twinkly lights on the ceiling, lit fifty candles and scattered rose petals around the floor leading towards her double bed. 

It feels like a lifetime ago. The day she met this tiny brunette at the halls of Riverdale High, she didn’t expect that she’s gonna be here, in her newly rented studio apartment, getting swept off her feet, figuratively. She’s just so...in love with this person. 

Toni shows up, a sheepish grin on her face. They don’t talk. They just stand there, three feet apart. Until Toni got closer, and closer and closer. She she just looked at her. She wonders how much time has passed. And there’s something so pure and so serene about this shared silence that Cheryl could feel as if they’re one. She could hear Toni’s breaths, could see her blink and it’s like they’re in sync. 

“Cher?”

“I love you.” She repeats those three words again as if she hadn’t made it clear earlier. “I love you.” Just in case Toni’s wondering. 

“I love you too.” 

She lifts her hand to cup Toni’s face for what felt like the hundredth time tonight, the brunette looking at her with so much lust and desire Cheryl doesn’t know what to do. 

Toni doesn’t make her figure it out. The brunette’s hand traveled around her waist, subtly finding the zipper of her dress. Toni is unzipping her again, and her head spins because the gesture alone doesn’t fail to spark her arousal. 

Toni’s hands come to the expanse of her shoulders, gently tugging on the straps of her dress. Their eyes met for a second, the brunette’s way of asking consent. Cheryl lifts her arm up, letting the top half of her dress pooling around her torso, her way of giving consent. 

Cheryl could literally die at the way Toni is looking at her right now. So she tugs at the brunette closer, pressing their foreheads together, hands on either side of her cheeks. 

“I love you…” she repeats again, just to make sure Toni knows. 

Toni’s lips where ghosting her own. “I love you, Toni.” She repeats for the fourth time and then Toni was kissing her, hard but soft at the same time. The brunette pulls away, kissing both of her closed eyelids, and then her cheeks, jaw, neck...chest. 

Cheryl moans at the feeling of her girlfriend’s soft lips travelling the line in between her breasts. Toni tugs on her dress, letting it pool around her feet before she’s kneeling down placing kisses on her thighs. 

Cheryl must’ve gotten the message and so she steps out of her dress completely. Toni stayed down, pulling on the straps of her red high heels, gently easing the redhead out of them. 

Aside from her panties, Cheryl is naked. 

Toni takes one long look at the girl standing in front of her again. She takes in everything, the rising and falling of the redhead’s chest, her nervous swallowing. Toni could cry at how beautiful her girlfriend is. And so she tugs on her own dress, pulling it swiftly above her head. She steps out of her own shoes, wondering if Cheryl could feel how nervous she is. 

She guides Cheryl to the bed, sitting the redhead down until she’s towering over her. Toni rakes her hand over to Cheryl’s hair before diving down and giving her all to the kiss. 

And Cheryl kisses her back. Their kisses grew faster and more fervent as seconds pass by, and Toni could feel herself wanting more, could feel herself getting hungrier by the minute. And so she guides Cheryl higher up the bed, until they reached the wooden headboard. Toni moves by her knees, diligently planting them on each side of Cheryl’s hips all while their lips are still connected. 

“Toni…” Cheryl moaned at Toni while the brunette sucked vigorously against her neck. 

“Shh...I love you too.” Toni lays them down. 

The redhead’s lip part, watching Toni take one nipple into her mouth. “ _ Fuck _ .” She mutters, her fingers pulling on pink strands. She fights to keep her eyes open, not wanting to miss a second of what it looks like to have her girlfriend at her breast. “Toni…” she calls again, as the brunette took the other nipple, and replaced her mouth with her hand with the other. 

Toni lets go of the bud with a loud pop, deciding this isn’t the time to be aggressive and leave marks. She wants this soft and slow, and passionate. So she goes back to kiss her girlfriend’s lips. 

But with the moans escaping her girlfriend’s mouth, Toni knows she couldn’t just be soft and slow. And the pressure in between her own legs is now starting to feel uncomfortable. 

So she nudges Cheryl’s legs and shuffling to accommodate her.  She cups her girlfriend firmly through the fabric of her underwear and it makes Cheryl’s back arch beneath her. She had to break their kiss to watch it.  _ Oh god, wet.  _

“Toni, please.” It falls so easily from Cheryl’s lips. “Please, baby…”

_ Fuck,  _ her mind went blank when Cheryl’s hips thrusted forward, her wetness rocking back into her hand. 

She feels herself salivating and so she licks the redhead’s neck before she’s kissing her way down her body. She toys at the band of her girlfriend’s lace panties, licking a small line underneath the belly button. 

Cheryl lets out the filthiest moan and it’s like Toni doesn’t even care if she gets noise complaints the next morning because that was music to her ears. Better than any other song. 

“Tell me what you want, Cher.”

The redhead responded by opening her legs wider and snaking her fingers along the pink streaks

Toni places kisses over the skin of her exposed inner thighs. “I wanna hear you say it.”

Cheryl growled, suddenly out of patient of this game Toni is playing. “I want you.” 

Toni purred, hooking her index fingers unto the band of the underwear, tugging it down the redhead’s legs. She looks up at Chery, with nothing but lust and desire in her eyes as she places a thumb into the girl’s clit, circling it slowly. 

“Toni…”

A smug smirk tugged on Toni’s lips. She knows what she’s doing isn’t enough and she knows she should be gentle and loving but she just couldn’t help it. She finds an irritated Cheryl cute. 

“I want...fuck.” 

“Babe, you gotta be more specific than that.” She said blowing air into the redhead’s exposed bud. 

The redhead sighed in frustration while Toni could feel her resolve slowly dying down. Especially after she takes another look at Cheryl Blossom, legs wide open, lips slightly parted and one hand gripping her own hair. 

As tough and as bossy Cheryl played, this is what really gets her going. 

“Come on, Cher…” Toni prompted, licking the crease where thigh meets butt. 

“I want you to fuck me!” The redhead screams in frustration.

_ Jesus Christ. “I love it when you say that.” _

“I want y-your mouth on me. Please.”

“My mouth?” Toni teases for the last time. She swears, it’s the last time. 

“Y-Yes. Please, please, please  _ fuck _ me baby.”

_ God,  _ if she wasn’t wet before, Toni’s definitely dripping by now. 

“Cher.”

“JESUS TONI, WHAT?”

Toni laughs. “I love you.” And then she’s diving straight to Cheryl’s core. She presses her tongue against Cheryl, lapping her as the redhead’s head fall loudly against the mattress. 

She yanks Cheryl’s right leg, raising it and letting it fall unto her shoulders to gain a better angle.  

The brunette sucked and licked as Cheryl’s loud moans echoed around the small room. The confident tongue delved deep inside and Cheryl almost screamed. Toni sees her putting the back of her free hand in between her lips to stop the moaning and she had to pull back. 

“Stop covering your mouth or I’ll stop.” She says firmly. “I want to hear you, is that clear?” 

Toni reaches for Cheryl’s free hand as the redhead nods, intertwining their fingers to keep her locked in. 

“Am I clear?”

Cheryl nods again. 

“Let us try that again. You’re gonna let me hear you or I’ll stop. Is  _ that  _ clear?” She says, more firmly. 

“Y-Yes.” 

“Good girl.” 

_ Jesus.  _ What Toni had planned to be the sweetest, most romantic sexual reunification has turned into...this. But god, it’s so worth it. 

“Oh  _ fuck. _ ” Her breathing was harsh and uneven as Toni goes back to the earlier task at hand. And Cheryl could feel herself getting close. The sight of Toni’s head being buried in between her thighs alone has her begging for release already. 

The side-to-side motion cause her brain to short circuit and god, she’s impossibly close. 

Toni pulled away slightly, replacing her mouth with two digits. “You’re close, baby. I can tell.”

Cheryl whimpers. 

She curled her digits upward and the played the redhead’s clit with her tongue. “Let go, baby girl. Cum for me.” And like on command, Cheryl’s body bolted. Her back arched up from the bed, and Toni had to hold her hips to keep her still. 

“Beautiful.” Toni mumbles, staring at her panting girlfriend, eyes shut firmly, lips parted widely. “So beautiful.” She places a soft kiss on the redhead’s temple. 

She cuddles into Cheryl, rakes a hand through the redhead’s hair as she tries to recover from her orgasm. 

“I’ll...I’ll just take a minute, TT. And then I’m going to rock your world.” 

“Uh huh. Like, you’re not already passing out as we speak. Rock my world tomorrow morning, baby.” Toni blows all the candles off, leaving the twinkly lights open before snuggling back to Cheryl. 

Cheryl smiles against the brunette’s neck. She was drifting off when she remembers something, yanking her awake. And she could tell Toni was on the verge of falling asleep too because of her reaction. 

“Cher. Wha—“

“Your flash drive.”

Toni groaned as she watches the redhead stumbles around the apartment in search of her purse. “Babe, it can wait tomorrow.”

“No, it can’t.” 

Cheryl sat on the double bed, all in her naked glory flashing Toni that small piece of plastic and metal. Toni takes the drive, shoving it to her drawer. 

“I do trust you, TT. Completely.” Cheryl declares. 

Toni squints at her. “I really can’t focus at anything until you cover up, Cher. It’s—I...please.”

“Come here.” Cheryl commands softly, patting her lap. 

Toni finds herself complying, straddling the redhead. She really intended this to be about Cheryl, but as her girlfriend stares at her with so much longing and lust, she couldn’t help it anymore. 

Cheryl kisses her, tries to give her the same amount of passion in her kisses. But she knows Toni is passed foreplay by now. So she reaches for the string of the brunette’s underwear, tugging it to the side. She runs her fingers through the brunette’s folds. 

“You’re so wet, babe.” 

“Could you hear the sounds you were making?” Toni answers, before letting out a moan of her own. “Cher...inside please. I’m already  _ so _ close.” And that’s true. Hearing Cheryl was enough to bring her to the edge. 

The sound of desperation from her girlfriend’s demands were enough for Cheryl to completely comply, inserting two fingers inside the brunette. 

Rotating her hips in sync with her girlfriend’s hand, Toni urged Cheryl to move faster. And the redhead decided not to drag it out by picking up the pace. She marvels at the sight of the brunette, moving on top of her, panting and moaning in her ear. 

She feels like an _ object.  _

And she couldn’t give a single fuck about that because fuck, Toni can just take what she wants right there. 

“Babe, I’m so close…”

Cheryl wrapped her free arm around Toni. “You can let it go, baby...I’m here. I love you.” 

_ Fuck,  _ Toni Topaz doesn’t cry. She hasn’t ever since that night of the storm. But when Cheryl’s pleasing her and whispering things like that in her ear she couldn’t help the watering in her eyes. 

Toni rolled her hips even faster, caught up with the heat and passion emanating from the two of them as she presses her forehead on her girlfriend’s shoulders. Cheryl’s fingers curved ever so slightly inside of her and she’s coming undone with an uncontrolled cry of satisfaction, her body getting what it had been craving. 

And  _ shit _ , she’s crying. 

She sags against Cheryl, sobbing. 

“Shh...It’s okay. I’m here.” Cheryl rubs a comforting hand over the brunette’s spine. 

It feels wonderful, fucking mind blowing that she gets to have this, share this life with this human being that she loves and loves her back. 

“I love you.” Cheryl repeats again, like an old broken tape but Toni thinks it only gets better. 

She lets Cheryl hold her, lets herself cry at the arms of the woman that she loves. And she tells her it’s going to be okay. Something’s going to give, another shoe will drop. The world is fucked up like that. But Toni thinks, the world can drop as many shoes as it fucking wants, as long as they have each other through it all, somehow they’ll be okay. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> yo it’s done!! Thank you so much for having faith in this fic. I hope you guys are as satisfied with the ending as i am. Please, please, please let me know what you think. my heart will be so happy to hear from you. i love you all.

**Author's Note:**

> yikes.
> 
> okay, if u want to say hi or give me a virtual punch i'm on twitter and tumblr under inyourbeanie.


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